# Channel Surfing Game **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 20, 2004, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002 "2004-07-20T14:49:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/1 "2004-07-20T14:49:24Z")
The point of this exercise is to insert a (preferably funny or interesting) snippet from a random TV channel. It’ll usually work best if you start and stop in mid-sentence. The posts should read like channel surfing. No need to quote previous posts. It should work just fine in free-form. For example: “…How could you think such a thing, Chad? Didn’t you know that the only thing I ever wanted from you was a…” “…new Ronco vegetable peeler and clothing steamer! You can dice, slice, and press everything from tomatoes to wool suits to…” “…Adolf Hitler. His brazen invasion of Poland caught Chamberlain by surprise, who said to the British parliament…” “…I am the Lord your God, quoting from chapter 7, verse 8. And then, when the children went out from Israel…” ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/2 "2004-07-20T15:44:15Z")
“…they taught the Pilgrims how to plant corn. And then the first Thanksgiving…” “…football game, one of the most exciting ever, which featured a leaping…” “…giant anteater, another denizen of the rain forest whose solitary lifestyle…” “…is not well suited for this kind of political discourse…” ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/3 "2004-07-20T15:53:10Z")
…especially between two male penguins. Quite often, the female will… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/4 "2004-07-20T16:41:02Z")
“…buy a vowel, Pat…” “…Boone, who blazed the famous Wilderness Trail…” “…mix well, then put in an ungreased…” ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/5 "2004-07-20T16:45:07Z")
“…Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?” “…Martha Stewart, sentenced to five months in…” “…Fallujah, while more bombs went off today in…” “…Truly, you have a dizzying intellect…” ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/6 "2004-07-20T18:45:31Z")
“…not unlike the ‘B’ movies of the early…” “…Bird Special, only 2.99 from now until we…” “…remember to never use two condoms at once, because…” ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/7 "2004-07-20T19:08:21Z")
…at this stage of the early universe, high energy leptrons are… …f@#$ing crazy! This whole G@#$$%mn plan is f@#$%ing crazy. Why would you… …get the money, see. Meatwad get the honeys… …from a former Iraqi intelligence minister. This is expected to have… ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/8 "2004-07-20T20:32:10Z")
… chicken fat! … ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/9 "2004-07-20T20:41:08Z")
…anywhere? DeVry can make your career go… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/10 "2004-07-20T20:42:53Z")
“…in the toilet bowl. The blue water…” ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/11 "2004-07-20T21:35:17Z")
“…is the best tasting water on Earth. Ask for it by…” ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/12 "2004-07-20T21:51:00Z")
“… SUNDAY! SUNDAY! SUNDAY! Watch Big Daddy and other drag…” “… Queens, where our Amy Rijkstadt is at Shea Stadium to interview…” “… the huge rabbit, as large as a three-year-old child…” ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/13 "2004-07-20T22:35:17Z")
…was moaning erotically! And this kind of stuff, this sleeze, is on network television where our kids… …buy the Ronco Official Turnup Tweedler and get a free… …hot rod without a carbourater? That’s about as useful as… …the humpback whale’s blowhole, which helps it… ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/14 "2004-07-20T23:01:53Z")
…eject magma 300 feet into the air. Superhot poison gases… …emerged from Air Force One today… …and firefighters evacuated the town of… …Athens, in preparation for the Summer… ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2004, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/15 "2004-07-20T23:23:53Z")
…visit from Aunt Trudy. I’m surprised you didn’t realize that she’ll be here tomorrow… …along with the leopard, one of the deadliest predators of the Serengeti. The mother wildebeest attempts to defend her calf while the leopard… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/16 "2004-07-21T01:40:01Z")
“…is outta here! And the crowd goes…” “…down 32 points, while the NASDAQ…” ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/17 "2004-07-21T02:09:19Z")
“…and he says he’s hooked on the Matrix movie series…” “…the beast will, at some point, pull back from the airship…” “…it was a really gut-wrenching time for the city…” “…they said that it’s been a political tug-of-war…” “…you are sixty days post transplant…” “…gift from the network when you make the…” “…Damien Miller ends the dream right there…” “…the birth of the first star…” “…she wouldn’t take no for an answer. And she was so sure you would be interested in her…” “…roughly south southeast…” “…when it comes to new ideas, Kenmore leaves no…” “…stroke and heart attack…” “…out now on Playstation 2 and XBox…” [sub]Why is this so fun?[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/18 "2004-07-21T02:48:50Z")
…16 people were killed when a big… …candy bar filled with rich nougat and coated with delicious… …eczema? get rid of it fast with new, improved… …deck stain, then we’ll rustproof the railing with… ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/19 "2004-07-21T03:05:11Z")
… a duck! … … last seen leaving the parking garage driving … … scattered showers with a possibility of … ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2004, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002/20 "2004-07-21T05:57:20Z")
“…headache, nausea, diarrhea, sore throat and…” “…he woke up from the coma, but doesn’t remember where he hid…” “…the greatest deal since…” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/channel-surfing-game/256002.md?page=2)