# Characters that you would smother with a pillow for the good of humanity **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 12, 2016, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783 "2016-09-12T20:16:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2016, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/41 "2016-09-13T21:58:56Z")
> [@Typo\_Negative](#): > > Not evil characters, mind you. Just the really annoying ones. The mindbogglingly stupid ones. > > For instance, I watched _The Pope of Greenwich Village_ the other day. The whole dang film. And I kept hoping that _somebody_ would shoot Paulie! Or shoot Charlie because he keeps hanging around him and blaming him and whining when Paulie’s antics inevitably blow back on him. I would totally smother Paulie with a pillow. “They took my thumbs.” > [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > I don’t recall the character’s name, but she was a character from _Maximum Overdrive_, a real suck fest of a movie Stephen King both wrote and directed. It was about big rig trucks coming to life and killing people. She had this really fake southern accent, a loud annoying whiny voice, and overly histrionic constant crying. > > Every time somebody discovered a truck-squashed victim, she’d be right there squawling “IS HE DEYUDD? OOOWAH OOOOYYYYEEEEWWWW!!” She deserved a concrete pillow and 10-12 more attempts on her life just to make sure. That was Yeardly (Lisa Simpson) Smith playing Connie and yes, that character was the sewer rat in a cesspool of a movie. My nomination? Everyone on “New Girl,” except Cece. And maybe Coach. ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2016, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/42 "2016-09-13T22:05:57Z")
Old Christine. (Julia Louise Dreyfuss on The New Adventures of Old Christine). Thanks to insomnia, I have been wide-eyed and awake and watching this, and I never in my life wanted to off a tv character so badly. Also her stupid unconsciously incestuous brother. I may let the Wanda Sykes character live, though. She’s sassy, though uncomfortably out of place on the show. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2016, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/43 "2016-09-13T23:07:12Z")
Not that any of the characters from **The Sopranos** deserved to live, but David Scatino, played by the usually reliable Robert Patrick, I wanted to smother. So whiny and pathetic, I kept wanting Tony to grab him, release him into the South Jersey woods and hunt him for sport. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2016, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/44 "2016-09-13T23:31:52Z")
> [@Hermione](#): > > Aw, why her? Most of the other characters cited in this thread are selfish, irresponsible, arrogant, or what have you. Melanie’s genuinely good–truly desiring to see others happy and willing to embrace people her society writes off because she sees good in them. (Witness her treatment of Belle Watling–or Rhett, for that matter.) She sees beyond Southern society’s (often superficial and judgmental) values to understand people’s true value–you could make a case that she even does this for Scarlett, recognizing what WAS good in her even if Scarlett’s PTSD twisted those qualities. > > She’s also strong in a different way from Scarlett–she’s coolheaded in a crisis (check out how she handles the men’s return from the Shantytown raid! And how she grabbed the sword and ran out to face the Yankee intruder when she was practically an invalid!) and, again, willing to stand up to everyone in her world in favor of what she believes to be right. > > And if you ask me, she’s a lot savvier than she lets on. Some say she was stupid for not realizing Scarlett’s feelings for Ashley. I think she might well have sensed them on some level but felt that Scarlett wasn’t really a threat–that whatever feelings Ashley had for Scarlett were only superficial. > > Finally, what I find most admirable about her is the fact that she suffers the same losses, deprivations, and trauma that Scarlett does–but she doesn’t allow them to harden or embitter her. > > You ask me, humanity could USE more people like her. You should have read about how she thought in the book. Remember when Scarlett offered Ashley the job managing her mill? In the movie Melanie was glad for that as she wouldn’t have to be parted from family and friends. In the book that was _another_ reason as well. If the Wilkes family had been forced to go North, Melanie was concerned about her son having to go to school with black children, “pickaninnies” as she called them. Melanie was relieved that didn’t have to happen. ---
**Author:** ![Backwater\_Under\_Duck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ba8739/32.png) [@Backwater\_Under\_Duck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Backwater_Under_Duck)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/45 "2016-09-14T01:06:47Z")
Jeeze guys. The entire cast of Seinfeld. Yeah they were funny. Because they had funny writers. But what a miserable group of narcissistic, nasty people who totally deserved each other’s misery. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/46 "2016-09-14T01:09:25Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > Jar Jar Binks. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/8yy3q9f84EA/maxresdefault.jpg "Darth Jar Jar - Star Wars Theory") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yy3q9f84EA) ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/47 "2016-09-14T01:14:30Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > Lily Tucker- Pritchet(Modern Family) - What an unpleasant creature. I found her character amusing for a minute but the one note, sarcastic brat routing has gotten old that’s what we get for making daria types popular on tv … ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/48 "2016-09-14T01:20:37Z")
Lwaxana Troi was even more annoying than her daughter, which takes some doing. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/49 "2016-09-14T01:30:56Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > Lwaxana Troi was even more annoying than her daughter, which takes some doing. As big a mouth as she was, you’re gonna need two pillows. ---
**Author:** ![Tinker\_Grey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tinker_grey/32/8136_2.png) [@Tinker\_Grey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tinker_Grey)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/50 "2016-09-14T01:48:25Z")
Jenna Maroney, _30 Rock_. ---
**Author:** ![E-DUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/e-dub/32/403_2.png) [@E-DUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-DUB)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/51 "2016-09-14T03:06:49Z")
Fifty posts in and NO ONE has mentioned Neelix or Wesley Crusher? ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/52 "2016-09-14T04:49:39Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > Melanie Wilkes I’ll help. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/53 "2016-09-14T04:51:28Z")
“Flo” from the Progressive insurance commercials. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c57346/32.png) [@Little\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Pig)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/54 "2016-09-14T05:05:37Z")
> [@Idle\_Thoughts](#): > > Just for the record, I’m pretty sure the OP meant fictional characters, not real life people. If you want to discuss real life people whom you hate, please make another topic about it. Let’s keep this one narrowed down to just fictional ones. OOOOOOOOps. Sorry. Fictional characters hey? OK, Bozo. That fucking clown always did give me the creeps. Crusty too. Does Trump qualify as being a fictional character? ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 9:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/55 "2016-09-14T09:25:22Z")
> [@Rhiannon8404](#): > > I’ll help. Thanks. Most welcome. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/56 "2016-09-14T12:53:54Z")
> [@E-DUB](#): > > Fifty posts in and NO ONE has mentioned Neelix or Wesley Crusher? Everybody has already vented themselves to the point of exhaustion over their dislike of these characters. The hate eventually runs out. ---
**Author:** ![drewder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/57b2e6/32.png) [@drewder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewder)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/57 "2016-09-14T13:33:34Z")
> [@E-DUB](#): > > Fifty posts in and NO ONE has mentioned Neelix or Wesley Crusher? Funny I was going to say the same thing. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/58 "2016-09-14T13:39:32Z")
So you guys probably don’t want to see my Wesley/Neelix slash porn? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/59 "2016-09-14T13:52:38Z")
Jenny Schecter from the L Word. She was supposed to be an audience surrogate who helped introduce us to this crazy and sexy world of rich California lesbians but everything she did was awful. Every season she got terribler and terribler until the last one where she got killed, then they spent that whole season making it a mystery of who killed her but really, who cared? ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783/60 "2016-09-14T16:24:37Z")
> [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](#): > > “Flo” from the Progressive insurance commercials. I’d rather just pillow her. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/characters-that-you-would-smother-with-a-pillow-for-the-good-of-humanity/765783.md?page=4)