# Cheap jokes about Americans **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [May 18, 2005, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342 "2005-05-18T01:42:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/81 "2005-05-20T13:24:24Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > In American English. In Australian English, you are all Yanks. You callin’ me a “Yank?” Them’s fightin’ words in these parts, hoss. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/82 "2005-05-20T13:30:16Z")
> [@spoke-](#): > > You callin’ me a “Yank?” > > Them’s fightin’ words in these parts, hoss. > > 😃 This message has not reached all your compatriots. There is a message board, run by American ex-pats here in the UK, called _[UK-Yankee.com](http://UK-Yankee.com)_ ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/83 "2005-05-20T13:33:56Z")
Down here, we fought a rather large-scale war against “Yanks” a few years back. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/84 "2005-05-20T13:44:44Z")
> [@Jeff Lichtman](#): > > I wish I could remember where I first heard this: > > To people outside the U.S., a Yankee is an American. > > To people in the southern states, a Yankee is a northerner. > > To people in the north, a Yankee is someone from New England. > > To New Englanders, a Yankee is someone from Vermont. > > To Vermonters, a Yankee is someone who eats pie for breakfast. Obviously not all uses of the work “Yankee” by Americans fall into this rubric. The New York Yankees, for example, take their name from the connotation of the national nickname, the meaning usually only employed by non-Americans. They aren’t claiming to represent Ma and Pa Kettle, after all. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/85 "2005-05-20T13:47:25Z")
> [@Rayne Man](#): > > This message has not reached all your compatriots. There is a message board, run by American ex-pats here in the UK, called _[UK-Yankee.com](http://UK-Yankee.com)_ From that page I have found a thread entitled [Romance Novel Covers reinvented](http://talk.uk-yankee.com/index.php?topic=12060.0) 😃😃😃😃😃 ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/86 "2005-05-20T19:58:56Z")
> [@spoke-](#): > > Down here, we fought a rather large-scale war against “Yanks” a few years back. Yes, and you lost. Get over it. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/87 "2005-05-20T21:08:32Z")
This reminds me of a time in Dublin when I happened upon an establishment with the oxymoronic name (to American ears) “The Yankee Rebel” (featuring a large Confederate battle flag painted across the front of the place, IIRC). “The Yankee Rebel?” To balance the scales, I’m going to start a bar in Atlanta called “The English Rapparee.” ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/88 "2005-05-20T21:42:03Z")
> [@spoke-](#): > > To balance the scales, I’m going to start a bar in Atlanta called “The English Rapparee.” Go ahead, it’ll whoosh us all 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ignatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/3be4f8/32.png) [@Ignatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ignatz)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/89 "2005-05-20T23:22:59Z")
> [@betenoir](#): > > You forgot Climax (north of Blue Balls, just go straight through Intercourse). And that’s just before Paradise. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/90 "2005-05-21T04:44:15Z")
> [@betenoir](#): > > And beyond that, it _started out_ British as a name for ALL Americans…so I’d say y’all have dibs. Nah, the Dutch colonists were the first to apply it the English colonists. So, applied to Americans, it’s always been an “American” thing. Though the Dutch picked it up from the Belgians, who applied it to _them_, back in the Old World, so if anyone has dibs, it’s the Belgians. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/91 "2005-05-21T05:13:09Z")
What do you callsomeone who speaks three or more languages? _Multi-lingual._ What do you call someone who speaks two languages? _Bilingual._ What do you call someone who only speaks one language? _An American._ ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/92 "2005-05-21T06:32:06Z")
> [@Enola Straight](#): > > What do you callsomeone who speaks three or more languages? > _Multi-lingual._ > > What do you call someone who speaks two languages? > _Bilingual._ > > What do you call someone who only speaks one language? > _An American._ I am afraid that equally applies to us Brits. We are notoriously famous for not learning and speaking other languages. ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/93 "2005-05-21T08:35:03Z")
> [@Larry Mudd](#): > > Nah, the Dutch colonists were the first to apply it the English colonists. So, applied to Americans, it’s always been an “American” thing. > > Though the Dutch picked it up from the Belgians, who applied it to _them_, back in the Old World, so if anyone has dibs, it’s the Belgians. And there ya go. Not only does the American know nothing about Canada but the Canadian knows more about American history than the American. Well, can I at least get credit for understanding irony 😛 ? I guess I should retaliate by coming up with a derogatory name for the Belgians but honestly I can’t think of anything more derogatory than “Belgian”. (A joke I stole from some Englishmen…) ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/94 "2005-05-21T09:05:14Z")
> [@betenoir](#): > > And there ya go. Not only does the American know nothing about Canada but the Canadian knows more about American history than the American. Well, can I at least get credit for understanding irony 😛 ? > > I guess I should retaliate by coming up with a derogatory name for the Belgians but honestly I can’t think of anything more derogatory than “Belgian”. > > (A joke I stole from some Englishmen…) That , of course, is a direct pinch from the _Hitch Hiker’s Guide To The Galaxy_. According to that, the last taboo regarding swearing was to use the word **Belgium**. ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 9:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/95 "2005-05-21T09:40:35Z")
> [@betenoir](#): > > And beyond that, it _started out_ British as a name for ALL Americans…so I’d say y’all have dibs. Ya, but isn’t Yank just the polite form of Septic? ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/96 "2005-05-21T09:42:06Z")
> [@Rayne Man](#): > > That , of course, is a direct pinch from the _Hitch Hiker’s Guide To The Galaxy_. According to that, the last taboo regarding swearing was to use the word **Belgium**. Erm…actually it’s a direct pinch from Monty Python (and unlike the fucking near water, I think they get full credit for this one.) (BTW - Newark, huh? Lovely town from what I saw of it…have you ever been to the Newark we have named after it over here? No? Good! Didn’t translate well.) ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 9:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/97 "2005-05-21T09:49:29Z")
> [@China Guy](#): > > Ya, but isn’t Yank just the polite form of Septic? Hee hee…somewhere on this board (I can’t remember what the original thread was) there’s a whole discussion on whether or not “Septic” was hate speech against us poor Americans. The concept of “taking the piss” was introduced, but rejected by the more tight assed amoung us. ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/98 "2005-05-21T10:01:49Z")
> [@betenoir](#): > > Erm…actually it’s a direct pinch from Monty Python (and unlike the fucking near water, I think they get full credit for this one.) > (BTW - Newark, huh? Lovely town from what I saw of it…have you ever been to the Newark we have named after it over here? No? Good! Didn’t translate well.) I hate to disagree but the Belgium thing is from THHGTTG. I even have it on tape from the original radio show. Yes I have never heard anything good about your Newark. At least the one in New Jersey , but I think there are a few more towns of the same name over there. I don’t know what they are like. ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 10:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/99 "2005-05-21T10:21:01Z")
Yes, I know how you Poms hate to disagree 😃 but… […and a Mr. St. John of Huntingdon said he couldn’t think of anything more derogatory than Belgians.](http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode37.htm#10) Under “Prejudice”, somewhere in the middle. I believe it predates THGTTG. And anyway that’s where I got it from. And yes I was thinking of the one in New Jersey. ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2005, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342/100 "2005-05-21T10:50:10Z")
> [@betenoir](#): > > Yes, I know how you Poms hate to disagree 😃 but… > > […and a Mr. St. John of Huntingdon said he couldn’t think of anything more derogatory than Belgians.](http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode37.htm#10) > > Under “Prejudice”, somewhere in the middle. I believe it predates THGTTG. And anyway that’s where I got it from. > > And yes I was thinking of the one in New Jersey. OK I think you win that one , but it’s news to me. Do you think Douglas Adams was aware of this Monty Python sketch when he wrote is Belgium piece ? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheap-jokes-about-americans/304342.md?page=4)