# Cheating, porn use and the Coolidge Effect **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 6, 2013, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154 "2013-03-06T04:14:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/21 "2013-03-06T10:12:59Z")
> [@Nunzio\_Tavulari](#): > > Then recognize that and stop demeaning her in front of strangers by repeatedly describing her as a 5. Bring up her better points. On this board I’m sometimes wanting feedback about my thoughts - my actual thoughts not ones that have heaps of P.C. spin on them. This kind of showing of my actual thoughts is based on therapy I’ve had. > [@](#): > > …I’m certain that a little drawing on a wall was just as erotic to the viewer as an internet porn site. Possibly more so, as hundreds of spray-tanned, artificially enhanced porn actors splayed out across the screen can be anything but erotic. So a little drawing on the wall is “possibly more so” erotic than a person surfing the Internet with high-def images and videos of whatever tickles their fancy that would have so much variety that it could entertain them for weeks on end (e.g. if they investigate all the different fetishes and look at all the videos their favorite pro or amateur stars have made) > [@](#): > > I have no problems with children being exposed to pornography. All humans are sexual beings, but individuals awaken to those feelings at different ages. How do you define child? I’m talking about childhood… then there is adolescence. I’d say a typical child is between 5 and 10. > [@](#): > > Twelve or thirteen ids a child under the law, but I know that at that age I was doing everything I could to see pictures of naked ladies. It’s a natural curiosity. Internet porn isn’t just pictures of naked ladies! It often involves cum shots, gang bangs, etc. > [@](#): > > At nine, I couldn’t have cared less. I often saw women and girls in changing rooms at the beach and in stores and they incited no interest in me. At five, I’m not sure that I cared how bodies were configured. But what if they had access to porn? BTW a friend of mine got naked with a girl when they were about 5 - she would have learnt that from somewhere. > [@](#): > > Children will have sex when their hormones tell them to. Whether they know what sex is or not makes a difference… it makes the difference between them experimenting with touching and knowing how to have sex including oral sex, etc. > [@](#): > > Before that, they may be curious but they won’t stay interested for long. No child I know would be the least bit interested in putting any part of their anatomy where people poop comes from. I suspect that if you gave a kid access to every bit of porn that existed they’d find some of it very interesting… > [@](#): > > …If we treat sex as a natural human function instead of repressing it, there may be increased use of contraceptives as fewer will be inclined to hide them from their parents and peers. We’ve tried a lot of other stuff to reduce teen pregnancy, why not give this a try? Is looking at super-attractive women (whatever a person’s definition of that is) have sex or be sexual for ages (even hours on end) a “natural human function”? With porn it is like having thousands of unique sexual partners. Naturally a typical human being would only have a few sexual partners in their lifetime. > [@](#): > > Because I think you are posting outrageous topics with the hope of drawing outrageous reactions. I have doubts about the veracity of your claims. I take that last part as a compliment - it shows my life is somewhat unbelievable. ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/22 "2013-03-06T10:36:47Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > Just before my wife told me and her brother that she had a very bad dream last night but didn’t want to talk about it. I asked her if she was embarrassed but she said she wasn’t. Later she revealed that in her dream she was cheating on me… it seems even my loyal wife isn’t immune to the Coolidge Effect… She just said that in the dream she was crying a lot - that’s a good sign. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/23 "2013-03-06T12:22:14Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > Just before my wife told me and her brother that she had a very bad dream last night but didn’t want to talk about it. I asked her if she was embarrassed but she said she wasn’t. Later she revealed that in her dream she was cheating on me… it seems even my loyal wife isn’t immune to the Coolidge Effect… :dubious: In my dreams I’ve (occasionally) killed people, stolen things, and gone out without clothes on; it doesn’t mean I’d happily be a murderer, thief, or nudist. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/24 "2013-03-06T12:23:05Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > She just said that in the dream she was crying a lot - that’s a good sign. Does she cry often during the day? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/25 "2013-03-06T15:00:52Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > Later she revealed that in her dream she was cheating on me… it seems even my loyal wife isn’t immune to the Coolidge Effect… But that’s not the same thing as you described above. A heterosexual woman who’s attracted to one adult male is normally going to also be attracted to other adult males. But the point you were presenting in your OP is that somebody who’s been attracted to adult males for a long enough time will get bored with them and start being attracted to something else. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/26 "2013-03-06T21:03:57Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > I was just thinking about cartoon porn… in the past I’ve seen very explicit pictures of Bart and Lisa and Maggie getting up to mischief - it was meant to be humorous I think… e.g. Bart getting Maggie to suck his doodle. More recently I’ve seen more erotic Simpsons parodies though in them Bart and Lisa had hit puberty and Lisa had breasts, etc - maybe so it couldn’t be considered child pornography. Not his doodle.:eek: ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/27 "2013-03-06T21:06:23Z")
Every time you talk about your wife, I feel more and more sympathy for her. ---
**Author:** ![jools](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b3f665/32.png) [@jools](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jools)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/28 "2013-03-06T21:12:07Z")
Yeah, what Guinastasia said… dang that poor girl! ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2013, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/29 "2013-03-06T21:56:10Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Does she cry often during the day? Not that I know of… BTW she sometimes pretends to cry (she pulls a funny crying face). ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/30 "2013-03-07T00:00:57Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > But that’s not the same thing as you described above. A heterosexual woman who’s attracted to one adult male is normally going to also be attracted to other adult males. But the point you were presenting in your OP is that somebody who’s been attracted to adult males for a long enough time will get bored with them and start being attracted to something else. She might be subconsciously bored though… in recent times we always start with her getting me hard, then we do missionary position then I stop when I have come (without an organism) and I sometimes say “I came” or she asks “did you come”? ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/31 "2013-03-07T00:18:10Z")
The best part of this is the reason that it’s called the Coolidge Effect. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/32 "2013-03-07T00:32:26Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > when I have come (without an organism) :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/33 "2013-03-07T01:56:02Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > She might be subconsciously bored though… in recent times we always start with her getting me hard, then we do missionary position then I stop when I have come (without an organism) and I sometimes say “I came” or she asks “did you come”? Please do me a favor and never describe your sex life again. I’m willing to have a discussion on the general topic but I really don’t want to hear your personal details. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/34 "2013-03-07T01:58:56Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > She might be subconsciously bored though… in recent times we always start with her getting me hard, then we do missionary position then I stop when I have come (without an organism) and I sometimes say “I came” or she asks “did you come”? Try again, but when you tell her you came, have her pinch your nipples. Take my word. ---
**Author:** ![bobkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c67d28/32.png) [@bobkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobkitty)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/35 "2013-03-07T02:15:44Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Please do me a favor and never describe your sex life again. > > I’m willing to have a discussion on the general topic but I really don’t want to hear your personal details. +eleventy billion. ---
**Author:** ![Beastly\_Rotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/45deac/32.png) [@Beastly\_Rotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beastly_Rotter)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/36 "2013-03-07T02:36:20Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Does she cry often during the day? Not after she drinks. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/37 "2013-03-07T02:46:49Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > when I have come (without an organism) > > > [@bump](#): > > > > :eek: Well, I guess we know why “she’s” only a 5 now. He: “You have no personality!” “She”: _\_ ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/38 "2013-03-07T02:55:31Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > I was just thinking about cartoon porn… in the past I’ve seen very explicit pictures of Bart and Lisa and Maggie getting up to mischief . . . You should see the vast amount of “My Little Pony” cartoon porn! ---
**Author:** ![Lakai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lakai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lakai)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/39 "2013-03-07T03:10:05Z")
Porn might be responsible for some decrease in sexual desire, but it is not always the sole cause of one’s low interest in their partner. [Here is an alternative explanation.](http://thelastpsychiatrist.com/2011/02/hes_just_not_that_into_anyone.html) A summary won’t do this article justice. If anyone thinks that porn is the sole cause of their low desire for their partner, then they should read this. ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2013, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154/40 "2013-03-07T07:29:13Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Please do me a favor and never describe your sex life again. > > I’m willing to have a discussion on the general topic but I really don’t want to hear your personal details. I was just justifying why my wife might in fact be a bit subconsciously bored with sex. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheating-porn-use-and-the-coolidge-effect/652154.md?page=3)