# Check-in for All male Newbies.... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 22, 2000, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235 "2000-06-22T20:19:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/41 "2000-06-22T21:53:11Z")
> [@](#): > > **Naw, I don’t mind; just stay here and hold my …hand. 😉** Well, since I finally got here…_glares at Ayesha_ Oh VB, I think you need a…private examination. Come with me, please. _leading way behind the curtain_ ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/42 "2000-06-22T21:56:18Z")
:: enters room :: :: looks around :: _sigh_ ::disrobes:: ::looks around again:: “Hey what are you laughing at” ::leaves room shattered:: Keith ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/43 "2000-06-22T22:10:21Z")
OK Winky99 here they are. ( \* Y \* ) Qualified enough for ya ? Now strip. ---
**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/44 "2000-06-22T22:13:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > **Naw, I don’t mind; just stay here and hold my …hand. 😉** > > Well, since I finally got here…_glares at Ayesha_ > > Oh VB, I think you need a…private examination. Come with me, please. _leading way behind the curtain_ > \*\* Now, Falcon, I realize that I’ve lost some weight. But, I haven’t lost _that_ much! I’m still here. 😛 Why don’t you go help out with MettalicAsh or ArkonDLoC? They seem to need more help at the moment. 😉 You can finish up with VB as soon as I’m done with him. Ok? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![winky99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/71c47a/32.png) [@winky99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/winky99)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/45 "2000-06-22T22:14:04Z")
_very excited_ Yes Maam!!! ::Hops up on table:: Aieee thats cold!!! ---
**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/46 "2000-06-22T22:15:45Z")
Ummm, _this_ curtain, Falcon? Uhhhh…Ok… ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/47 "2000-06-22T22:27:56Z")
Well, purp, it looks like he went with me… 😉 Now VB, let’s test how well your…reflexes are. _grins slowly, adjusts VERY short and tight uniform, and moves behind the curtain_ ---
**Author:** ![ArkonDLoC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a8b319/32.png) [@ArkonDLoC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArkonDLoC)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/48 "2000-06-22T22:38:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > Why don’t you go help out with MettalicAsh or ArkonDLoC? They seem to need more help at the moment. 😉 > > \*\* I can wait. I’ll just use the time to study, if someone would be so kind as to remind me what subject we’re here for? And why is everyone wearing such tight clothing? :Ajusts sleeve of Darth Maul style robe: ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/49 "2000-06-22T22:41:13Z")
::Thinking to self _damn, how did she get all 4 tires replaced so fast_:: Oh HI Falcon, my friend. I was just feeling err, filling in till you got here. So now you’re here I’l just be going now. ::turns and flees:: Please don’t let her catch me. ---
**Author:** ![Sofis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Sofis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofis)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/50 "2000-06-22T22:42:30Z")
You’re the kind of people my mother warned me about, aren’t you? Great! I’m joining right in :D. ---
**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/51 "2000-06-22T22:52:37Z")
**Hummph!** _FINE_. Be that way, then. I’ll just go over here and sit by myself in the corner…alone… By myself with this oil and… ---
**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/52 "2000-06-22T22:59:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > **Hummph!** _FINE_. Be that way, then. I’ll just go over here and sit by myself in the corner…alone… > > By myself with this oil and… > \*\* Ummmmm…Is it cinnamon oil? ---
**Author:** ![pipefitter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/97f17d/32.png) [@pipefitter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pipefitter)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/53 "2000-06-22T23:02:55Z")
Here I am, ready for my check-up… **What do you mean I have my gown on backwards, I always put the ties in front!** ---
**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/54 "2000-06-22T23:04:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > Ummmmm…Is it cinnamon oil? > \*\* Naturally, my dear. What else would I have for you? I _know_ how much you like the cinnamon flavor…😉 ---
**Author:** ![Nilvedman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/46a35a/32.png) [@Nilvedman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nilvedman)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/55 "2000-06-22T23:04:41Z")
Am I the only male newbie who can keep his pants on? For crying out… Well, I’ll just stand in the corner here and make sure things don’t get too far out of hand… Yeah, that’s right… just standing over here in the corner… Oh, don’t stop on account of me! I was just standing here looking for my keys in my pocket when… I have to go now… Oh, dear. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/56 "2000-06-22T23:07:38Z")
_smiles at VB_ Of course…I have cinammon oil too… 😉 And I’m a busty redhead… And Ayesha! Come back! After all, Eve isn’t here yet. We still need a doctor! ---
**Author:** ![Sassy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@Sassy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sassy)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/57 "2000-06-22T23:29:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\*H-e-l-l-o…Is there anyone available to see me? \*\* Rubes, honey - put that down. They are very busy here, as you can see, but I will keep you company. How’ve you been? Why don’t you whisper it…🆒 ---
**Author:** ![GaWd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f08c70/32.png) [@GaWd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaWd)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2000, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/58 "2000-06-23T00:13:22Z")
Ok, I’m game. I’ll just strip and sit right on down here until one of you lovely ladies can see me. \ And it’s one I don’t have! -Sam ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2000, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/59 "2000-06-23T00:14:04Z")
All for your delight, I am not here. Er, I am here. But I am nervous. I haven’t had a physical done in about two years. Anyone care to guide me through it very slowly? And btw I do not like oil. Now, can someone explain to me how this works? And what’s with the delivery truck full of various gels and oils? [aside] I wonder if I should have brought a stun-gun[/aside] I’ll just be here in the lobby rearranging the . . . uh . . . magazines. Or seat cushions. Or something. ---
**Author:** ![ArkonDLoC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a8b319/32.png) [@ArkonDLoC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArkonDLoC)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2000, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235/60 "2000-06-23T00:26:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > > I’ll just be here in the lobby rearranging the . . . uh . . . magazines. Or seat cushions. Or something. > \*\* Forget the excuses: just run like I’m about to. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/check-in-for-all-male-newbies/23235.md?page=4)