# chick tract **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 18, 2002, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718 "2002-06-18T18:23:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Omega\_Glory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/7c8e57/32.png) [@Omega\_Glory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omega_Glory)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2002, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/1 "2002-06-18T18:23:27Z")
Just stopped lurking to ask if anyone has seen this yet. Sorry if it’s come up before. [http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/5012/5012\_01.asp](http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/5012/5012_01.asp) I’m almost convinced now that this guy is just joking around. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2002, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/2 "2002-06-18T18:46:45Z")
I don’t normally get into the Chick bashing because it’s so trite, but this one _does_ make me start to wonder if the guy is really serious anymore. Some thoughts: The witch’s name is “Samantha”. I’m suprised she didn’t wiggle her nose. “ **Charmed** , I’m sure” (bolding Chicks) looks like Jack’s been watching the WB. “Samantha, the Harry Potter books open a doorway that will put untold millions of kids in to hell” I never did trust that book mobile guy. “… A King James version. It’s the only version Satan hasn’t messed with” I can’t think of anything even mildly witty here, I’m just speechless. Jack Chick is probably a nutcase, but sometimes I wonder if he’s a genious pulling an elaborate hoax on the extreme religous right. ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2002, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/3 "2002-06-18T18:52:58Z")
anyone notice Omega Glory’s initials? OG ! ---
**Author:** ![Wikkit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c0e974/32.png) [@Wikkit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wikkit)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2002, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/4 "2002-06-18T19:56:53Z")
Am I the only one who’s opened a chick tract thread in the pit hoping that the person is complaining about an expanse of land used for growing baby chickens? ---
**Author:** ![Journeyman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/779978/32.png) [@Journeyman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Journeyman)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2002, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/5 "2002-06-18T22:35:15Z")
I don’t mean to offend, but Chick has been pretty thoroughly bashed. I thought he was funny for a while, but when the realization that he means every word sinks in, I want very much to go away and forget about him. Fenris wrote a couple of parodies of Chick tracts that were quite funny. You ought to be able to search them up, though they might have been lost in The Winter of Our Missed Content. All that said, welcome to the boards! ---
**Author:** ![butter\_pie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aca169/32.png) [@butter\_pie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butter_pie)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2002, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/6 "2002-06-18T23:05:24Z")
Why do the Bible guys in these things always look like slimy perverts, with those little mustaches? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2002, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/7 "2002-06-19T02:50:56Z")
Because it’s always the same guy-“Bob.” ---
**Author:** ![butter\_pie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aca169/32.png) [@butter\_pie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butter_pie)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2002, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/8 "2002-06-19T03:55:21Z")
Hmm… [Coincidence?](http://www.subgenius.com/) ---
**Author:** ![DeadlyAccurate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ac91a4/32.png) [@DeadlyAccurate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeadlyAccurate)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2002, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/9 "2002-06-19T04:07:13Z")
For a while now I’ve had this sneaking suspicion that Jack Chick is a very elaborate hoaxster. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Kentzel-Griffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ccd318/32.png) [@John\_Kentzel-Griffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Kentzel-Griffin)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2002, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/10 "2002-06-19T11:38:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by \*\*\*throatshot \*\* > For a while now I’ve had this sneaking suspicion that Jack Chick is a very elaborate hoaxster. The thought occured to me, but I doubt it. At any rate, those who push those stupid tracts _really_ believe in them. It’s kinda sad. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2002, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/11 "2002-06-19T12:38:44Z")
> [@](#): > > Fenris wrote a couple of parodies of Chick tracts that were quite funny. [AHEM!!!](http://www.teemings.com/extras/spoofe01.html) Better recognize, yo. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/12 "2002-06-20T01:46:47Z")
Wow. There’s a woman with a familiar spirit at **Endor**? The crazy Ewoks. You just can’t trust 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/13 "2002-06-20T02:11:05Z")
Jack Chick influences [Mark Trail?](http://www.azcentral.com/ent/comics/marktrail.html) You be the judge. ---
**Author:** ![Already\_in\_Use](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Already\_in\_Use](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Already_in_Use)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/14 "2002-06-20T07:43:55Z")
That’s funny, Jin, I made a post a while back commenting on the same thing. Also note how many tracts refer to “Connie”, “Bob”'s wife. ---
**Author:** ![Hamish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a5b964/32.png) [@Hamish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamish)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/15 "2002-06-20T17:49:45Z")
Thanks for the link, **Omega Glory**. As a gay Wiccan, I intend to make liberal use of that tract for sig lines on various boards. For the record, I think he really does believe what he says. The problem with being a satirist these days is that life is always so much more absurd. Anyway, almost every Chick tract spawns a Pit thread, here. I don’t think you’ll find anyone who agrees with him at the SDMB. Even the conservative, evangelical Christians here seem to think of him more as an embarassment than anything else. I wonder what he’d say if he knew the King whose name is attached to the “the only version of the Bible Satan hasn’t messed with” had a male lover named George. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/16 "2002-06-20T18:23:23Z")
He does address that, **Hamish** , saying it’s a lie. Uh huh. King James was a jerk anyway. So it really doesn’t matter. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/17 "2002-06-20T18:25:45Z")
Now, don’t be nasty about George Villiers, Duke of Buckingham, **Hamish** ; it’s not his fault that he was young and good-looking and able to wrap the King and the Prince of Wales around his, uh, little finger. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Hamish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a5b964/32.png) [@Hamish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamish)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/18 "2002-06-20T19:30:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\*He does address that, **Hamish** , saying it’s a lie. Uh huh. > > King James was a jerk anyway. So it really doesn’t matter. > > 😛 \*\* Haven’t read that tract, yet, but I can picture it: "There was no better Christian than King James. Champion of the witch hunts, scourge of parliament, a hero to all those who know how dangerous tolerance is. "Any rumours of his homosexuality or closet Catholicism are the result of rampant liberalism, the Gay Agenda, and the secular-humanist conspiracy. Widespread acceptance of these theories can only blamed on subliminal messages in the Harry Potter books. “King James – a real American hero.” 😃 > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Polycarp_ > \*\*Now, don’t be nasty about George Villiers, Duke of Buckingham, Hamish; it’s not his fault that he was young and good-looking and able to wrap the King and the Prince of Wales around his, uh, little finger. \*\* Oh I wasn’t being nasty to him. I have very little opinion about the James’ “gentleman of the bedchamber” – I’m reserving myjudgment until after I see the webcam pictures 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/19 "2002-06-20T20:07:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\* > King James was a jerk anyway. So it really doesn’t matter. > \*\* That’s not fair…he was better than his son. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2002, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718/20 "2002-06-20T20:15:01Z")
Yeah, but his mother kicked both their asses. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chick-tract/114718.md?page=2)