# Child-like ways to solve real world problems. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 10, 2009, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689 "2009-01-10T17:44:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Lily\_Milliner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8edcca/32.png) [@Lily\_Milliner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lily_Milliner)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/21 "2009-01-11T02:56:35Z")
As Chris DeBurgh put it in one of my favorite angsty anthems from my junior high days, Let’s put 'em in a room together And make them fight it out 'Til they see nothing from nothing Will leave nothing at a-a-a-all… (Anyone else remember this song? Anyone? Anyone? Sigh. Thought not.) ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/22 "2009-01-11T03:09:26Z")
What if we teach the world to sing in perfect harmony? And then we buy them a Coke? Surely that ought to solve something. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/23 "2009-01-11T03:49:13Z")
My way of solving all issues in the middle east: giving everyone air conditioning, porn, and booze. “I _was_ supposed to go blow myself up at the market today, but Sasha Grey has a new movie…and I’m kinda buzzed. Plus, it’s really really hot outside.” ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/24 "2009-01-11T04:34:08Z")
Religion is stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/25 "2009-01-11T04:38:04Z")
Better yet, make everyone in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict sit down and watch _Mister Rogers_ until they all learn to get along. And tell them, “If you can’t share the Holy Land, NOBODY GETS IT!” ---
**Author:** ![AllWalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@AllWalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AllWalker)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/26 "2009-01-11T04:57:07Z")
> [@Jettboy](#): > > The next Israeli/Palestinian peace conference should have milk and lots of pie available. You just can’t fight when there’s _pie_ around, man. Pie fight. ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/27 "2009-01-11T20:50:54Z")
I recommend dancing in the moonlight. [QUOTE=King Harvest] We like our fun and we never fight You can’t dance and stay uptight It’s a supernatural delight Everybody was dancing in the moonlight [/QUOTE] ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/28 "2009-01-11T20:57:59Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > What if we teach the world to sing in perfect harmony? And then we buy them a Coke? > > Surely that ought to solve something. Well, it’ll solve Coca-Cola’s stock worries for the second quarter of '09, for sure! ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/29 "2009-01-11T21:13:26Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > **Child-like ways to solve real world problems.** Palestine gets to cut while Israel gets to choose. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/30 "2009-01-11T21:25:55Z")
> [@Captain\_Carrot](#): > > Problem: feeding everyone in the world. > Solution: give everyone a good meal. “Let them eat cake !” ---
**Author:** ![bluecanary](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bluecanary/32/3614_2.png) [@bluecanary](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bluecanary)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/31 "2009-01-11T21:29:38Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > People with too much money should give it to people with not enough money. What I came into this thread to say. Utopian socialism, the most childishly stupid idea taken seriously (even now, in the 21st century) by hordes of supposedly grown-up people who ought to know better. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/32 "2009-01-11T21:33:23Z")
> [@bluecanary](#): > > What I came into this thread to say. Utopian socialism, **the most childishly stupid idea taken seriously (even now, in the 21st century) by hordes of supposedly grown-up people who ought to know better.** I’m having trouble parsing that sentence. Are you saying that sharing the wealth is a bad idea? ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/33 "2009-01-11T21:33:57Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > And? We’re quoting _Hogfather_. ---
**Author:** ![bluecanary](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bluecanary/32/3614_2.png) [@bluecanary](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bluecanary)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/34 "2009-01-11T21:36:11Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > I’m having trouble parsing that sentence. Are you saying that sharing the wealth is a bad idea? Well, yes. If you are saying that wealth should simply be divided equally across the population, then that is a seriously bad idea. Any more discussion of this would probably take this thread badly off-topic, and would be better suited to GD or perhaps the Pit. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/35 "2009-01-11T21:38:17Z")
I just wanted to be clear on what you were saying. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2009, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/36 "2009-01-11T22:09:58Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > What if we teach the world to sing in perfect harmony? And then we buy them a Coke? And get them all hyped on caffeine? That’ll just make it worse! Can we teach them to sing “Joy to the World?” Not the Xmas carol, but the _Jeremiah was a bullfrog_ song? ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2009, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/37 "2009-02-06T00:52:21Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > Famous brainbox Edward De Bono suggested sending large quantities of Marmite to the middle east, believing that the aggression in that area is being exacerbated by vitamin and mineral deficiencies that would be remedied by the stuff. > > Trouble is, even if it worked, that would just enrol the subjects into a brand new, and equally polarised dispute - love Marmite or hate it. Which is why they should use Vegemite. Or Ovaltine. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2009, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/38 "2009-02-06T01:34:07Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > My way of solving all issues in the middle east: giving everyone air conditioning, porn, and booze. > > “I _was_ supposed to go blow myself up at the market today, but Sasha Grey has a new movie…and I’m kinda buzzed. Plus, it’s really really hot outside.” Awesome. ---
**Author:** ![Sine\_Nomine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sine_nomine/32/513_2.png) [@Sine\_Nomine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sine_Nomine)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2009, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/39 "2009-02-06T02:41:27Z")
During some errands a couple weeks ago, I overheard some store employees discussing the endless Senate race here in Minnesota. One argued very convincingly that it ought to be settled by a ladder match. Plus, we could put it on Pay-Per-View and make _mucho_ revenue for the state. ---
**Author:** ![Euryphaessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Euryphaessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euryphaessa)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2009, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689/40 "2009-02-06T03:32:45Z")
There should be one pool of cars in every community that are owned by the town. People sign up for trips they want to take and when they get a carfull of people that all have the same destination, they can sign out the car and go on their trip. There, I’ve solved global warming. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/child-like-ways-to-solve-real-world-problems/480689.md?page=3)