# Childhood experiences you never had **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 29, 2003, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999 "2003-04-29T21:04:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![dwc1970](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a183cd/32.png) [@dwc1970](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwc1970)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/1 "2003-04-29T21:04:12Z")
What are some of the things you never experienced as a child but most other people you know seem to have been through? These don’t necessarily have to be good things; they’re just things you can’t relate to by personal experience. Here’s my random list of things I never encountered while growing up: [ul] [li]Wear braces (I did have to wear a retainer, though)[/li][li]Get paddled at school (I had few run-ins with the principal as it was)[/li][li]Serve time in after-school detention or Saturday school[/li][li]Attend summer camp[/li][li]Get caught with porn mags[/li][li]Get caught in activity associated with said porn mags[/li][li]Participate in most pranks (tipping over an outhouse, setting a bag of dog shit on fire and leaving it on someone’s doorstep, etc.)[/li][li]Grow up with a younger sibling (I was the youngest to two older sisters)[/li][li]Stay home from school (seriously, I never missed a single day)[/li][li]Cut classes or play hooky[/li][li]Get in a fight[/li][li]Have “the big sex talk” with my parents (a friend gave me a book which I think my mom gave to him so that he could give me the book and I wouldn’t be as embarrassed)[/li][li]Play sports (after-school sports, Little League. etc.)[/li][li]Have a dog (I’m a cat lover, so I don’t really regret missing out on this)[/li][/ul] ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/2 "2003-04-29T21:08:53Z")
Never had an [imaginary friend](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=180417) ---
**Author:** ![TheOnlySaneOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@TheOnlySaneOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheOnlySaneOne)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/3 "2003-04-29T21:46:00Z")
I never broke a bone. Ever. ---
**Author:** ![Blackeyes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f6c823/32.png) [@Blackeyes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackeyes)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/4 "2003-04-29T23:04:21Z")
Flintstone’s Chewable Tablets. Why me? ---
**Author:** ![Super\_Gnat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Super\_Gnat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Super_Gnat)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/5 "2003-04-29T23:16:34Z")
Never broken a bone. Also, never got stitches until I was 15; don’t know if that counts or not. Never graduated from kindergarten. (though I attended) Never thought boys were icky. 😛 Never went to an overnight summer camp (again, until I was a teenager.) ---
**Author:** ![Shera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Shera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shera)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/6 "2003-04-29T23:16:36Z")
I never broke a bone either. I never went to Chucky Cheese, or anything like that. I never had any younger siblings either (youngest of 4). However, enough people are in the same boat so I never really feel I missed out on that. The one thing that really used to bug me when I was a kid, because all of the neighbors did it and it seemed like so much fun, was going to Sunday school. I never did it. My family wasn’t religous so I never got to go, but every Sunday there would be no one in the neighborhood to play with because they were all at church. I hated that then, it doesn’t bug me that much now. ---
**Author:** ![FranticMad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c68b51/32.png) [@FranticMad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FranticMad)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/7 "2003-04-29T23:38:11Z")
Never had a conversation or walk with grandparents. ---
**Author:** ![Eman\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Eman\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eman_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/8 "2003-04-29T23:43:33Z")
Summer Camp? What’s that? ---
**Author:** ![chigger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@chigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chigger)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/9 "2003-04-29T23:55:23Z")
I never had a dad. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/10 "2003-04-29T23:57:34Z")
I never had a “first woody.” I’ve been getting erections as far back as I can remember. It blows my mind when I hear people say they never got one until they were 12 or 13. ---
**Author:** ![Aankh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@Aankh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aankh)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/11 "2003-04-30T00:04:06Z")
never had a close female friend. never saw anything even remotely pornographic till i hit 17. ---
**Author:** ![Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laughing_Lagomorph)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/12 "2003-04-30T00:06:13Z")
Never broke a bone. Never cut classes. Never had the big sex talk either, thank God. Never did the cross country trip with the whole family in the station wagon to the Grand Canyon (or Disney World, or whatever). Didn’t go to the Senior Prom, or any school dance. No drugs or smoking. No underage drinking (well, until college). ---
**Author:** ![rostfrei](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7bcc69/32.png) [@rostfrei](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rostfrei)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/13 "2003-04-30T01:39:41Z")
I never got to go to DisneyWorld! Back when I was young, it seemed that all of my neighborhood pals got to go, but not me. Come to think of it, I never got to go on a family vacation anywhere…ever. ---
**Author:** ![haardvark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5ac83/32.png) [@haardvark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/haardvark)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/14 "2003-04-30T02:50:09Z")
Never had chicken pox as a kid. I even remember my Mom trying to expose me to kids in day care, Kindergarten etc. but it never took. Instead, I got ‘em 4 years ago, when I was 27. **I do not endorse this as a chicken pox strategy**. The itching was not a big deal but I had trippy fevers for about 6 days that wouldn’t break for nothin’ (103-104 degrees). I spent most of the time in the dark because reading or watching TV bothered my eyes, gave me vertigo, and sometimes got worked into my hallucinations in baaaaaaad ways. (The guest room in our house, where I stayed, has glo-in-dark star and planet stickers festooned on the ceiling from a previous occupant…that made for some wild trips at night, too). After the infection cleared up I felt like someone had beaten the stuffing out of me and replaced it with some sort of “essence of logy” for about a month or so. On a related note, I was told at eighteen that my wisdom teeth were gonna cause trouble if I didn;t get 'em out by 21. Got them out at 26 instead (a procrastinator, me). Took 4 days off work cos I said I would and planned for it, and it was a pretty easy convalescence (except for falling asleep in a chair while alone in the house eating applesauce – ended up with the stuff all down my front and somehow **soaking my left sock**. The pain fairy came on my first day back at work, so I spent the first week back stoned on ty-3’s and even more useless than usual. ---
**Author:** ![dwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwyr/32/363_2.png) [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/15 "2003-04-30T06:19:04Z")
Never had a birthday party. Never went trick or treating. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/16 "2003-04-30T06:24:26Z")
Never went to summer camp (my parents were both teachers and so had the same vacation schedule as me) Never went to summer school Never went to Sunday school (or what seemed to be the Catholic equivalent, CCD, which was on Wednesdays) Never went to church service with my parents (they never went either) Never cut classes (except for one gym class my junior year in HS) Never had the big sex talk (learned it from books) Never got caught masturbating or otherwise enjoying porno Never had siblings Never moved to a new neighborhood Never got arrested Never got sent to the principal’s office for disciplinary reasons Never got my mouth washed out with soap (did any parents actually do that?) Never broke a bone (dislocated a couple, though) Never got a black eye Never climbed a tree (tried to on a few occasions, but all the trees around our house were either too big or too small) Never got threatened with military school ---
**Author:** ![pizzabrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9c0ed/32.png) [@pizzabrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pizzabrat)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/17 "2003-04-30T06:25:09Z")
Cisco: > [@](#): > > I never had a “first woody.” I’ve been getting erections as far back as I can remember. It blows my mind when I hear people say they never got one until they were 12 or 13. That’s because it’s not true. There’s no such thing as a “first woody”, everyone has them since infanthood. Whoever told you about a “first woody” is either lying or deformed. ---
**Author:** ![pizzabrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9c0ed/32.png) [@pizzabrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pizzabrat)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/18 "2003-04-30T06:27:18Z")
Oh, and I never even knew about masturbation till I was 15. I never snuck out of the house, either, or started cursing, or thought I was invincible. ---
**Author:** ![yola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/48db29/32.png) [@yola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yola)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 9:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/19 "2003-04-30T09:49:00Z")
I never had the childhood experience of growing up in the same house, same neighborhood, same school my whole childhood. The mere thought astounded me, yet I somehow felt cheated, left out. I don’t know why but til this day I still have the moving bug in me. Never made it to Dismalworld either. Got to see and do a lot of things other kids didn’t. ---
**Author:** ![green\_bladder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/73ab20/32.png) [@green\_bladder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/green_bladder)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2003, 10:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999/20 "2003-04-30T10:02:03Z")
Never got into a fight Never broke any bones, had any stitches or dislocated anything Never smoked or did drugs Never climbed anything (fences, trees, walls) Never got caught with porn (had some \* pretty \* close calls though) Never had siblings Never had braces [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/childhood-experiences-you-never-had/171999.md?page=2)