The Max and Ruby books, near as I can tell the point is a lonely young brother better not try to be included in his older sisters life. With no parental supervision whatsoever the neglected kid grows up oppressed under the absolutism of a sexist bossy impossible to please little drama queen.
I’d completely forgotten about that book until this thread. At the end, though, he discovers he likes hanging out with the baby.
Angelina Balllerina. The moral of the stories (and associated shows) is that you can be a right little selfish bitch to everyone around you but it all turns out ok if you just apologize winningly enough.
Feh. Hate her.
The dog gets his dinner. Though I don’t think anyone would have minded if it had been the other thing. The guy was a total bastard. The dog was probably able to eat his food because Mary had gone upstairs to put a pillow over his face.
Here is cruel Frederick, see!
A horrid wicked boy was he;
He caught the flies, poor little things,
And then tore off their tiny wings,
He killed the birds, and broke the chairs,
And threw the kitten down the stairs;
And oh! far worse than all beside,
He whipped his Mary, till she cried.
After he beats the dog for no reason it bites him. About time time somebody stood up to the creep.
I have a similar problem with The Last of the Really Great Whangdoodles. The story begins with three children meeting a weird old man in the park and going with him to his house. IIRC, they also lie to their parents about where they’ve been.
Tom Brown’s Schooldays. Because boys love cuddling each other. Yes, I know it was written in a different time.
Looks like we didn’t try EVERYTHING.
And the third book, where they find Mrs. McGregor’s husband, who disappeared years ago after being accused of stealing a lot of money. She takes him back without even a “Where the fuck have you been?”
Message: If you’re a three-year old girl and your mom doesn’t pay enough attention to you at the laundromat, wander away from her and go talk to guy who looks like an over-the-top pedophile stereotype - she will soon feel properly ashamed of herself.
Heh, in my misspent youth I was briefly singer in a band that used as lyrics the “little suck a thumb” and “cruel fred” poems from the Struwwelpeter.
Even as a little kid, I could tell this song was meant as a joke. I think we need to give it a pass.
This. A thousand times this.
Most deplorable protagonist in modern children’s books.
She whines constantly.
She cannot bear not being the star of the show.
She treats her friends and family like crap.
Even the stories themselves are horrible, though – the antagonists are often completely in the right, and yet they are given an unearned comeuppance.
Wait in line and get your tickets when Angelina forgot to get hers? You’ll end up with shitty seats after her dad has fortunately already gotten good tickets (and an interview with the stars) through his work. Guess you shouldn’t be mildly unpleasant to everybody’s favorite mouse.
This one always seems to come up in these types of threads, and I never get it. I adore that story. Does it maybe miss being seen that the parent in the story lets the child win? “I love you to the moon .. and back” only comes after the kid has fallen asleep. It’s exactly the sort of safe and reassuring “contest” that kids love to have with their parents, and I just love it.
If we’re straying into television shows I’m going to mention Peppa Pig. Every show she abuses her father, makes her little brother cry and acts like a horrible selfish brat. She doesn’t even TRY to be nice. She’s also the reason my daughter goes stomping through muddy puddles at every opportunity.
And I’ll second Thomas the Tank Engine. Every epsiode Thomas is asked to do something, screws it up badly and ruins everything. Then he decides to do it properly and all is well again. Except that nobody seems to mind the chaos he’s already caused. In one episode he was messing around and ruined a boxcar load of drinks for a children’s party. But it was okay, because he went back and got more! Never mind that because of him they had to spend twice as much on drinks. Idiot train…
The Gruffalo books have a simple lesson for children: If they get into trouble they should lie. If they keep lying for long enough, everything will be ok.
This is *exactly *what I want my kids to be thinking.
We’ve started on the Brer Rabbit stories. They’re fun, obviously, but for every Tar Baby story where Brer Rabbit uses his wits to escape from being dinner there are a half a dozen where he steals from or humiliates the stupid just because he can. If you recast the stories in the Warrior rather than Trickster archetype they would go something like (dialect-free version):
“One day Brer Rabbit was walking by the river when he saw Brer Fox. ‘Here’s a chance for some fun!’ he thought to himself. So he walked up to Brer Fox and punched him hard in the face. Then threw him in the river. ‘Ha-ha!’ laughed Brer Rabbit. ‘That’ll teach old Brer Fox.’”
Thirding Thomas. It was always a bit weird - one of the original tales was of Henry, who stayed in a tunnel rather than go out in the rain. So the Fat Controller went totally Cask of Amontillado on him and bricked him into the tunnel for months on end. A lesson in conflict resolution for us all, there.
Now the moral is mainly “If you screw up simple instructions by goofing around, all will be forgiven” but there are occasional weirder episodes. For instance, one recent episode was heartfelt agit-prop about the evil of having Health and Safety codes in the workplace. I think the Daily Mail must have editorial control.