How much sarin gas can a pigeon fart?
You win.
I also think any pigeons with devices shoved up their cloacas would not only be walking funny … er, funnier, but might have a little trouble actually flying. But maybe that’s the point, they’d drop into or waddle around the crowd in order to cause more damage?
And now I have two quotes rattling around my head:
“Rectum? Damn well, killed’em”
and
“God as my witness, I thought pigeons with explosives shoved up their ass could fly!”
It’s a dirty job, but somebody’s gotta do it. I just feel bad for that guy.
The TSA’s standard practice to visually self-inspect their own anuses; they do not use any scoping device for these checks, just extreme flexibility.
I had not seen that. Great minds.
I recall reading somewhere – this Board maybe? – about someone who would impress crowds by shooting at pigeons or doves that someone had secretly shoved a big firecracker up their cloaca. A bird would be released, and the shooter would time his shot to coincide with the bomblet going off. The results were sick but spectacular.
“I know, I Know. But they can only do it ONCE…”
Is that a Taiwainese pidgeon or a Mainland pidgeon?
Better than Haiku (hī-Coo).
Wrong country. 
Wanted: Puckered Pidgeon Pooper Prober. Must be a motivated self-starter with long spindly fingers.
40 hours a week guaranteed. 401k and full benefits. Inquire at Party Headquarters.
No Agencies Please
Craigslist, of course! but under “Pets” or “Casual Encounters”?
You have to be careful about accepting that job. If you’re too good, you can get pigeon-holed in that career.
This has been Going on for a long time, even in the United States. The process is simple, insert the specially designed probe into the proper hole (technically “cloaca” is correct, byut commonly called the “ass”), spread the tip on a special paper that checks for bomb residue.
Really, I’m surprised the people on this board have never heard of a Pigeon Ass Probe (PAP) smear.
Craigslist, the same the world over.
More like Weapons of Ass Desctruction.
Hi honey! How was work today?
I don’t want to talk about it.