# Chinese US immigrant parents request "bride price" from non-Chinese US groom's parents?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chinese-us-immigrant-parents-request-bride-price-from-non-chinese-us-grooms-parents/650775>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [February 19, 2013, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chinese-us-immigrant-parents-request-bride-price-from-non-chinese-us-grooms-parents/650775 "2013-02-19T05:12:29Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\
**Post date:** [February 19, 2013, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chinese-us-immigrant-parents-request-bride-price-from-non-chinese-us-grooms-parents/650775/1 "2013-02-19T05:12:29Z")

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Per this “Ask Prudence” audio clip is this really something that they would expect to get in the US from their daughter’s non-Chinese fiance?

[Dear Prudence: My Big Fat Chinese Wedding](http://www.slate.com/articles/life/dear_prudence/2013/02/dear_prudence_my_husband_wears_women_s_gym_clothes_when_he_works_out.html)

It seems kind of grasping. Chinese are no dummies, you’d think they would realize the rules are different here.

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**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\
**Post date:** [February 19, 2013, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chinese-us-immigrant-parents-request-bride-price-from-non-chinese-us-grooms-parents/650775/2 "2013-02-19T05:18:10Z")

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> [@astro](#):
>
> Per this “Ask Prudence” audio clip is this really something that they would expect to get in the US from their daughter’s non-Chinese fiance?
> 
> [Dear Prudence: My Big Fat Chinese Wedding](http://www.slate.com/articles/life/dear_prudence/2013/02/dear_prudence_my_husband_wears_women_s_gym_clothes_when_he_works_out.html)
> 
> It seems kind of grasping. **Chinese are no dummies, you’d think they would realize the rules are different here.**

They didn’t realize they hadn’t taken over yet. 😃

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**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\
**Post date:** [February 19, 2013, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chinese-us-immigrant-parents-request-bride-price-from-non-chinese-us-grooms-parents/650775/3 "2013-02-19T06:06:25Z")

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I don’t think Prudence did her research; in Chinese culture it’s the _groom’s_ family that pays for the wedding.

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**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\
**Post date:** [February 19, 2013, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chinese-us-immigrant-parents-request-bride-price-from-non-chinese-us-grooms-parents/650775/4 "2013-02-19T15:44:52Z")

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I was about to say that my Chinese mother-in-law got ripped off, since I didn’t pay any dowry or “bride price”. But come to think of it, we did make her some gifts of cash at Xmas; my wife seemed to think that was expected, as far as supporting your parents goes.