# Chit chat on cell phone in public... rude? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 20, 2003, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575 "2003-10-20T20:31:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/21 "2003-10-21T13:18:29Z")
Damn, **Eve**. I like the cut of your jib. _Try to be more interesting!_ I’ve got to remember that. Tee-hee. ---
**Author:** ![AngelicGemma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/439d5e/32.png) [@AngelicGemma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelicGemma)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/22 "2003-10-21T13:45:56Z")
Unless there being annoying loud it doesn’t bother me. And most people I come across on phones are just talking normally. Guess I’m lucky! ---
**Author:** ![Baby\_Fish\_Mouth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a8b319/32.png) [@Baby\_Fish\_Mouth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baby_Fish_Mouth)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/23 "2003-10-21T14:17:45Z")
It boggles my mind that someone would WANT to have a loud, personal conversation on their cell in public. I was once riding the bus and there was a girl on her cell phone next to me. She was having a very dramatic fight with her boyfriend, and I know the whole bus could hear it. That’s just kind of pathetic. ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/24 "2003-10-21T15:32:57Z")
I have run across several cases of downright rude. 1. sitting in a restaurant, a guy at the table next to me takes a phone call. He proceeds to spend the next 10 minutes discussing a medical procedure he had taken part in. He sounded like some kind of healthcare worker. If it had been an emergancy, that would be one thing. This sounded like the answer to a “What did you do today” kind of question. 2. Going to a live performance. You know the person. They get a phone call 1 minute after someone walks on stage and asked people to turn off the ringers on their phones and pagers. And then there are the just plain pathetic. I was in a bar listening to a live band last weekend. The guy next to me picks up his phone and makes a call. Ahh, DUH. I can’t hear myself think. What do you suspect the person on the other end of that call can hear? ---
**Author:** ![NoGoodNamesLeft](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/8797f3/32.png) [@NoGoodNamesLeft](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NoGoodNamesLeft)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/25 "2003-10-21T17:07:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scarlett67 \* > \*\*I went to the local downtown mall and sat at one end of a quiet area with tables and good lighting. It was the middle of the day and the mall was nearly deserted; and no one was in “my” area except people occasionally walking through. A radio station was playing at low volume over the speakers, just enough distraction to keep me from getting bored with my paperwork, but not intrusive. > > After about 45 minutes of peace, two women sat down **at the table directly across from me,** unpacked their lunches, and started yakking. I could clearly hear every word. Apparently they were oblivious to the twenty other tables in that zone, especially the ones **at the other end of the room,** and also to me at my table with papers spread out, bent over my work. Granted, I accept that I was not in a library and had zero right to expect absolute quiet or not to be disturbed. But give me a break – these women completely changed the character of the room from quiet to yakkasaurusville. > \*\* Tough beans. Take your ass to a library if you want peace and quiet. I don’t think there’s a reasonable expectation of serenity in a mall food court. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee59a6/32.png) [@CrazyMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyMonkey)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/26 "2003-10-21T17:08:30Z")
Hey, you guys are talking about me! I talk on my cell phone in public places, and it’s often idle chit-chat. If I can take a little bit of boredom out of grocery shopping and save a little time by catching up with my friends while I’m at it, good for me! I’m never rude about it. I speak in a normal tone of voice, I pay attention to where I’m going and what’s going on around me, and when I get to the checkout line, I tell whoever I’m talking to I’ll call them back or they have to hold _before_ it’s my turn with the cashier. Yet some people always feel they must give me dirty looks. IMHO, they are the ones being rude. Even though I partake in the frequent public cell phone conversation, it used to annoy me when others did it as well. When I thought about it, this is what I decided: annoyance comes from discomfort. What was discomforting was that when I heard someone’s public phone conversation and I wasn’t otherwise engaged, I would listen in. No big deal, that’s just human nature, and you all know you do it. The discomfort comes from A) I can only hear 1/2 the conversation, and B) because the other person isn’t visually engaged, they are much more likely to notice me listening in on their conversation. B is actually quite uncomfortable. So, since my discomfort is a result of my own voyeurism (and yours is too – admit it!), I figure my annoyance is my own fault, not anybody else’s. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/27 "2003-10-21T17:35:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CrazyMonkey \* > **I’m never rude about it. I speak in a normal tone of voice, I pay attention to where I’m going and what’s going on around me, and when I get to the checkout line, I tell whoever I’m talking to I’ll call them back or they have to hold _before_ it’s my turn with the cashier. Yet some people always feel they must give me dirty looks. IMHO, they are the ones being rude.** Are you _sure_ you’re talking “in a normal tone of voice?” Most of the people I have to admonish on the train had no idea they were shrieking till I brought it to their attention. ---
**Author:** ![Mal\_Adroit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@Mal\_Adroit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mal_Adroit)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/28 "2003-10-21T17:48:01Z")
To answer your question, **autz,** I find it harmless _and_ obnoxious. Someone meandering through a public place blathering into a cell phone the entire time strikes me as more than a little insecure. It’s like they can’t handle being in a large place surrounded by these uncommunicative strangers; they have to carry along people they know to either (a) look like they’re loved/needed or (b) convince _themselves_ that they’re loved/needed. Of course, if you ask them about it, they’ll insist they’re “multitasking” or some such sh\*t. ---
**Author:** ![nobrainer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a587f6/32.png) [@nobrainer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nobrainer)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/29 "2003-10-21T18:00:17Z")
Chit chat on cell phone in public… rude? Yes. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/30 "2003-10-21T18:04:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NoGoodNamesLeft \* > \*\*Tough beans. Take your ass to a library if you want peace and quiet. I don’t think there’s a reasonable expectation of serenity in a mall food court. \*\* Please reread the penultimate sentence in my second paragraph: > [@](#): > > Granted, I accept that I was not in a library and had zero right to expect absolute quiet or not to be disturbed. I did not get huffy or hissy with these women. I simply noted that they could have been a little more aware of other people in their surroundings. I might also add that this was not your typical busy big-city mall, but one of the dying downtown types. It was very quiet; the area I was in used to be a food court but now has NO businesses in it whatsoever – just tables and some restrooms down a hallway. Very deserted. I have often taken my work to a busy big-city mall food court and was not disturbed at all by the noise because it was a dull roar, not a single conversation taking place at full volume five feet away. I might also add that libraries are sadly no longer quiet places either. When I want or need absolute quiet (or other control of my surroundings), I stay in my home office, where I am queen. ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/31 "2003-10-21T19:01:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by PalJuicy \* > \*\*It bothers me as well; I think it’s because it’s not an actual physical interaction between people. > \*\* I think you’ve hit the nail on the head–I didn’t know what it was until just now. When we’re walking around in the real world, we expect the other people there to react to each other in a normal, predictable way – even if it’s just subliminal, barely perceptible. One of those body language things. But when someone’s on a cell phone, he has turned away from the human beings around him, and is interacting with an invisible friend. This is unnerving to everyone else. What bugs the hell out of me is people who use cell phones during concerts and ball games. If you’d rather talk to your invisible friend than interact with the entertainment in front of you – go. Be with your friend. Try to be part of the real world. Try to be here now, for a change. ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/32 "2003-10-21T19:07:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dinsdale \* > \*\*I support legislation authorizinng - nay REQUIRING! - bystanders to grab those Nextel beep-to-talk phones/radios out of the hands of users and smash them against the nearest hard surface. \*\* I don’t get it – what is the point of those walkie-talkie things, anyway? What is their advantage over cell phones? ---
**Author:** ![CrazyMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee59a6/32.png) [@CrazyMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyMonkey)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/33 "2003-10-21T19:31:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\*Eve: \*\* Are you _sure_ you’re talking “in a normal tone of voice?” Ummmmmm…yep. That’s why I typed it. 🙂 > [@](#): > > \*\*Moody Bastard: \*\* Someone meandering through a public place blathering into a cell phone the entire time strikes me as more than a little insecure. It’s like they can’t handle being in a large place surrounded by these uncommunicative strangers; they have to carry along people they know to either (a) look like they’re loved/needed or (b) convince _themselves_ that they’re loved/needed. Yeah, because everyone that’s doing something you don’t do must be a huge loser, as opposed to, say, enjoying it, or finding it useful. :rolleyes: And you say _they_ are the rude ones. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/34 "2003-10-21T19:59:29Z")
I think cell phones in general are irritating. Ten years ago no one had them, and people survived. Unless you are in an emergency, I can’t see paying the fees and dealing with the phone ringing all the time. But, from my observation…that’s just me, because I’m probably the only person I know without one. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/35 "2003-10-21T20:57:21Z")
> [@](#): > > Someone meandering through a public place blathering into a cell phone the entire time strikes me as more than a little insecure. It’s like they can’t handle being in a large place surrounded by these uncommunicative strangers; they have to carry along people they know to either (a) look like they’re loved/needed or (b) convince _themselves_ that they’re loved/needed. Actually, I think [bold] Moody Bastard[/bold] nailed it. I see these people exactly the same way, which explains why I’m completely embarrassed to have anyone catch me talking on my cell phone in public. ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/36 "2003-10-21T22:10:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jsc1953 \* > \*\*I don’t get it – what is the point of those walkie-talkie things, anyway? What is their advantage over cell phones? \*\* Because regular cell phones weren’t annoying enough? 😉 Seriously though - my husband has one for work, and they’re all on the same “network” and can ‘beep and talk’ each other for free (no charge for minutes). AFAIK, you have to be on the same network, or get other people’s code to be able to ‘beep and talk’ to other people with the Nextel phones - you can’t just go get one and start yammering away. I think they sell them to companies with that idea; it’s “free” to use the walkie-talkie feature with all the employees on the network, but then they get screwed on minutes for the phone feature. My husband only has something like 200 minutes on the cell feature. ---
**Author:** ![moi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@moi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moi)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2003, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/37 "2003-10-21T22:33:58Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Baby Fish Mouth_ > \*\*It boggles my mind that someone would WANT to have a loud, personal conversation on their cell in public. > > I was once riding the bus and there was a girl on her cell phone next to me. She was having a very dramatic fight with her boyfriend, and I know the whole bus could hear it. That’s just kind of pathetic. \*\* I call my husband on my cell whilst riding the train home from school; we’re living separately (_not_ separated!) a few days a week until I finish my degree, and it’s the only convenient time for me to call him. So, that’s the why of using my phone in public. I do make an attempt to sit in a deserted part of the train and, since my husband is one of those loud-cell-phone-talkers, I watch my volume. Other than that, I tend to use the phone in public on rare occasions and for short durations (e.g. I’m at the video store and want a quick opinion). So, the short version: Some public cell phone users have rude behaviors, but I don’t think the act of making a public phone call is rude. BTW, love your username, Baby Fish Mouth. Great movie! ---
**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/38 "2003-10-22T06:49:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Moody Bastard \* > \*\*To answer your question, **autz,** I find it harmless _and_ obnoxious. Someone meandering through a public place blathering into a cell phone the entire time strikes me as more than a little insecure. It’s like they can’t handle being in a large place surrounded by these uncommunicative strangers; they have to carry along people they know to either (a) look like they’re loved/needed or (b) convince _themselves_ that they’re loved/needed. > > Of course, if you ask them about it, they’ll insist they’re “multitasking” or some such sh\*t. \*\* How do you know why they’re on the phone? If they’re being unnecessarily loud, or not watching where they’re going, that’s unquestionably rude. If they’re just talking - what’s the problem? I find your characterisation just as rude as the worst mobile phone user. ---
**Author:** ![Floater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/dc4da7/32.png) [@Floater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Floater)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/39 "2003-10-22T11:27:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Baby Fish Mouth \* > I was once riding the bus and there was a girl on her cell phone next to me. She was having a very dramatic fight with her boyfriend, and I know the whole bus could hear it. That’s just kind of pathetic. Apparently there is a word in Swedish and Norwegian for people like that: **mobilblottare** = mobile exhibisionist. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575/40 "2003-10-22T11:40:45Z")
_Originally posted by SnoopyFan_ > [@](#): > > I think people who walk around with a cell attached to their ear look insecure. Cell phones are the security blanket of the 21st century. When I read this I smacked myself in the forehead. That’s _exactly_ what it makes me think of, Linus and his blanket. Ironic that it should be **SnoopyFan** that brought it up. I’m sorry if that makes me rude, but that’s the impression I get when I see people clutching their phones and gabbing about the weather while doing their shopping. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/chit-chat-on-cell-phone-in-public-rude/208575.md?page=3)