# Choose your own superpowers **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 8, 2003, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291 "2003-04-08T12:23:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Sock\_Munkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Sock\_Munkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sock_Munkey)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/21 "2003-04-09T01:51:23Z")
Well, Storm can pretty much do that. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/22 "2003-04-09T02:04:10Z")
No one’s picked Superman? Well how can you beat Superman? He’s like God (except fot that kryptonite thing). Super strength, invulnerability. He can fly at unlimited speed. He can fly in space and don’t forget _X-Ray vision_. Come on, we all know what we’d do with X-Ray vison. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/23 "2003-04-09T02:46:55Z")
Screw the X-ray vision, Diogenes, give me the pheromes that make me irresistable to all babes. DreadCthulhu: It wouldn’t be a problem if I were bisexual. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/24 "2003-04-09T05:10:13Z")
I’d pick 3. The power to turn invisible(with my clothes on), the power to defeat any lock or security system with ease, and the ability to move without sound or leaving any trace of my existance there. That could be very useful. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/25 "2003-04-09T06:29:00Z")
Mimic from X-Men comics. Powers: Able to take on all the superlative abilities of anyone within a one mile radius, if I’m remembering my collector’s card right. Limitations: Only able to take on the abilities of people within a five hundred yard radius. Reasons: Well, duh. I’d always be the fastest, strongest, most flexible, resilient, etc person around me. It’d be especially useful if I decided to pursue a sports career. ---
**Author:** ![Weird\_AL\_Einstein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c67d28/32.png) [@Weird\_AL\_Einstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weird_AL_Einstein)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/26 "2003-04-09T07:25:59Z")
I’d take the powers of a character who is immortal. Is Superman immortal? Actually no, after reading “Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex”, I decided I wouldn’t want Superman’s powers. Just someone who’s immortal. Barring that, it would be cool to have the powers of The Mule, from Isaac Asimov’s “Foundation” series… ---
**Author:** ![wierdo203](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f14d63/32.png) [@wierdo203](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wierdo203)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 10:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/27 "2003-04-09T10:59:59Z")
Well, I’ve seen some X-men, and I’d take Jean Gray’s power, except that I have to transmit force from my body to do that. That would be cool, I just have to twitch my hands around, and rope does stuff. And it doesn’t need to be rope. But I have to have the physical strength to do it normally, even if I can’t reach. ---
**Author:** ![Alcibiades](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/cab0a1/32.png) [@Alcibiades](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alcibiades)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/28 "2003-04-09T13:44:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by wierdo203 \* > \*\*Well, I’ve seen some X-men, and I’d take Jean Gray’s power, except that I have to transmit force from my body to do that. That would be cool, I just have to twitch my hands around, and rope does stuff. And it doesn’t need to be rope. But I have to have the physical strength to do it normally, even if I can’t reach. \*\* Taking that a step further, I’d take Dark Phoenix’s power. Munch! There goes a star. Burp! Where is Galactus, I want an arm wrestle! Limitation: tendency to cosmic-level violence, killing races of people, that sort of thing. Maybe, then Rachel Summers’ powers: she used to mess up from time to time because she was inexperienced with them. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/29 "2003-04-09T14:01:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bippy the Beardless \* > **The ultimate super power is a prehensile penis, but I don’t know any comic book character with that ability.** Not to beat a dead horse, but…_Super-Skrull_! With the power of super-elasticity, a prehensile penis is only one of the many party tricks which are child’s play for the _Super-Skrull_! ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/30 "2003-04-09T14:02:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by The Peyote Coyote \* > \*\*You guys are such !@#$% geeks. > > Give me the Mandrill’s power: pheromes that enable you to mentally control all good-looking women. Now you’re talking!!! \*\* [Happy Birthday] You look like a monkey / and you smell like one too! [/Happy Birthday] ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/31 "2003-04-10T00:30:53Z")
Yes, otto, but if I get all the babes, who gives a rat’s ass? Certainly not me. ---
**Author:** ![Aslan\_of\_Narnia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecd19e/32.png) [@Aslan\_of\_Narnia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aslan_of_Narnia)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/32 "2003-04-10T03:05:09Z")
I’d have the powers of the Spectre, spirit of vengeance, basically being able to give vengeance on wrong doers. Essentially invincible and untouchable, with the ability to warp reality to kill off wrong doers. He’s power is probably second only to god, at least in the comics. My Depoweration: I’d be able to dole out punishment, in a less fatal way. IE, a mugger would trip and break every bone in his body, but manage to not kill him. Things like that. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/33 "2003-04-11T21:33:45Z")
Wow, some of you are much more creative tha I am. I guess what I really wanted was a perfect body to go along with my super brain. (arrogant bastard alert!) ---
**Author:** ![raisinbread](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8491ac/32.png) [@raisinbread](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raisinbread)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/34 "2003-04-11T22:42:07Z")
I wanna be the purple hulk! Raarrr!!! Except I can change into my hulk form at will, rather than if I’m angry or under duress. ---
**Author:** ![Mephisto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/48db29/32.png) [@Mephisto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mephisto)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/35 "2003-04-11T22:52:12Z")
I would be Logan/Wolverine. [ul] [li]I could start smoking again and not worry about any ill effects.[/li][li]I could be a total badass.[/li][li]I could experience the world in the same manner as my dog and therefore bond with him even more.[/li][li]I could go through the rest of my life without having to look for a letter opener.[/li][li]I could become rich by going to parties and bars and making stupid bets . . . “Yeah, go ahead, shove a pencil through my hand . . . betcha there won’t be a mark on me in five minutes.”[/li][li]I could get more hot babes than Tony Stark. ;)[/li] [/ul] ---
**Author:** ![Scupper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Scupper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scupper)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/36 "2003-04-11T22:53:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by elf6c \* > **The power to make anyone in the world crap their pants.** Best. Power. Ever. ---
**Author:** ![raisinbread](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8491ac/32.png) [@raisinbread](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raisinbread)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/37 "2003-04-11T23:05:05Z")
Actually I’ve been reading the Wild Cards novels lately and I reckon if I had to choose from that I’d choose to have the powers of the Puppeteer except without all the evil. well okay maybe half of the evil ---
**Author:** ![Apos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/838e76/32.png) [@Apos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apos)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2003, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/38 "2003-04-12T00:16:59Z")
I think you’re wildly underestimating Vegeta. Even pre-Crisis Superman couldn’t blow up a planet, but Vegeta could way back early in the series. ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2003, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/39 "2003-04-12T01:17:53Z")
I’d maybe go for the Martian Manhunter, myself. Basically all Superman’s powers plus shapeshifting, invisibility, intangibility, and telepathy. The only real drawback is the critical vulnerability to fire, which explains why the Martians never got very far as a civilization. Heck, even _Batman_ could defeat half a dozen Martians without too much trouble, and Batman has trouble fighting Mr. Freeze. (Hint to Batman: _Use warm things!_) So: ditch the pyrophobia, damp back the physical abilities to a reasonable level (i’m thinking here about the cover of _Action Comics #1;_ the ability to heave a Packard over my head, or rip the door to a safe off its hinges). But I’d probably spend most of my time using the shapeshifting, invisibility and flight powers anyway. Or, heck, why not go for the Brass Ring? Mr. Mxyzptlk is arguably the most powerful character in comics; he basically has the ability to alter reality at will. What would a more limited version of his power be like? Possibly only a limited number of changes can be made within a given time period, or perhaps the changes themselves have to be more moderate in nature (turning a person into a wombat is possible, but turning all people into wombats isn’t). As you can see, I hate doing things by halves. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2003, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291/40 "2003-04-23T17:06:37Z")
> [@](#): > > * * * > > ## Originally posted by elf6c **The power to make anyone in the world crap their pants.** > > \*Originally posted by Scupper \* > \*\*Best. Power. Ever. \*\* Do you need to be a superhero to get that power? I have a Brother-In-Law who’s a cook at Mario’s Frijole Shack… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/choose-your-own-superpowers/167291.md?page=3)