# Christian stance on sex **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [June 3, 2011, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229 "2011-06-03T18:40:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![TNWPsycho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/47e85d/32.png) [@TNWPsycho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TNWPsycho)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/1 "2011-06-03T18:40:27Z")
WHat is the official stance for the Catholic church, as well as other christian sects, does it differ? Premarital sex? Marrying a divorcee? Number of partners? I remember reading somewhere (correct me if im wrong) that the bible does not have any marriage ritual in it, or say how to perform one. Rather you are married once you have sex. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/2 "2011-06-03T18:53:27Z")
> [@TNWPsycho](#): > > I remember reading somewhere (correct me if im wrong) that the bible does not have any marriage ritual in it, or say how to perform one. Rather you are married once you have sex. Jesus’ first miracle, according to John 2, was at a wedding, though the details of the ritual are missing except that wine was served at the banquet with Jesus’ help. There’s no mention of sex at Cana. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/3 "2011-06-03T19:00:48Z")
The view that having sex means you’re married is from a fringe element. We have one of those on the Board. The Catholic Church prohibits marriage _within the Church_ after divorce. Most Christian sects allow it. Peter wasn’t too thrilled about sex to say the least. Pre-marital sex is pretty much a no-no faith-wide. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/4 "2011-06-03T19:27:34Z")
Note, by the way, that there’s no remotely mainstream sect of any religion that says that sex is inherently sinful (there have been a few cults that say that, but as can be imagined, they never last long). Every religion considers sex in its proper context (i.e., in a marriage, with one’s spouse) to be a good thing. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/5 "2011-06-03T19:33:14Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > The Catholic Church prohibits marriage _within the Church_ after divorce. More specifically, the Catholic Church considers legal divorce to be a civil matter that does not affect the marriage. So if you get divorced, (a) you cannot remarry in the Church, and (b) if you marry someone in a civil ceremony, or even just have sex, you’re committing adultery, not just fornication. **TWNPsycho** , the CC considers that a marriage does not exist until it is consummated by having sex. You still have to get married in the Church, but the marriage doesn’t actually exist until you hit the sheets together. **Chronos** , the Shakers practiced celibacy. To quote Wikipedia, “turnover was high”. Nice furniture though. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/6 "2011-06-03T19:42:45Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > The Catholic Church prohibits marriage _within the Church_ after divorce. I don’t think you’re supposed to ever do it in there. ---
**Author:** ![tim-n-va](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim-n-va/32/3001_2.png) [@tim-n-va](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tim-n-va)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/7 "2011-06-03T19:54:13Z")
I don’t like the use of the word “stance”. Baptist are opposed to having sex while standing up. It looks too much like dancing. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/8 "2011-06-03T20:15:07Z")
> [@](#): > > Chronos, the Shakers practiced celibacy. Yup, they’re one of the ones I was thinking of. I wasn’t aware that the group still existed, though. They’re certainly not mainstream. ---
**Author:** ![Crotalus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crotalus/32/41_2.png) [@Crotalus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crotalus)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/9 "2011-06-03T20:17:15Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Yup, they’re one of the ones I was thinking of. I wasn’t aware that the group still existed, though. They’re certainly not mainstream. I’m pretty sure that the Shakers are extinct. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/10 "2011-06-03T20:21:55Z")
> [@Crotalus](#): > > I’m pretty sure that the Shakers are extinct. According to [this article](http://www.bustedhalo.com/features/the-last-of-the-shakers), there are three left in the world. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/11 "2011-06-03T20:23:01Z")
No, there is still one Shaker community in Maine. There are only three members, though. The Shakers used to take in orphans, who could join the faith when they were 18. Enough did to keep things going, but that practice was ended by law in the 1960’s. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/12 "2011-06-03T20:25:01Z")
> [@tim-n-va](#): > > I don’t like the use of the word “stance”. Baptist are opposed to having sex while standing up. It looks too much like dancing. And yet, at choir camp, where a good 75% of the people were Baptist, only a handful sat out of dancing. And most of them did it because they had a boyfriend. I also don’t think anyone I asked turned me down for a dance. And there’s no way I qualify as “attractive.” ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/13 "2011-06-03T20:47:39Z")
> [@tim-n-va](#): > > I don’t like the use of the word “stance”. Baptist are opposed to having sex while standing up. It looks too much like dancing. I grew up in a Southern Baptist church and we used to go on river boat cruises with the youth group - there was plenty of dancing. So not all Baptists. ---
**Author:** ![Crotalus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crotalus/32/41_2.png) [@Crotalus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crotalus)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/14 "2011-06-03T20:48:35Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > According to [this article](http://www.bustedhalo.com/features/the-last-of-the-shakers), there are three left in the world. > [@RealityChuck](#): > > No, there is still one Shaker community in Maine. There are only three members, though. > > The Shakers used to take in orphans, who could join the faith when they were 18. Enough did to keep things going, but that practice was ended by law in the 1960’s. Wow! Thanks for the info. ---
**Author:** ![Alley\_Dweller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alley_dweller/32/430_2.png) [@Alley\_Dweller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alley_Dweller)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/15 "2011-06-03T20:57:05Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > More specifically, the Catholic Church considers legal divorce to be a civil matter that does not affect the marriage. So if you get divorced, (a) you cannot remarry in the Church, and (b) if you marry someone in a civil ceremony, or even just have sex, you’re committing adultery, not just fornication. Isn’t it OK to get remarried (in the Church even) after your ex-spouse dies? ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/16 "2011-06-03T21:03:33Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > The Catholic Church prohibits marriage _within the Church_ after divorce. Technically, only as long as the other divorced spouse is alive. Once he/she dies, the survivor is a widow/widower, and can then validly marry again within the church. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/17 "2011-06-03T21:17:55Z")
> [@tim-n-va](#): > > I don’t like the use of the word “stance”. Baptist are opposed to having sex while standing up. It looks too much like dancing. It’s a joke, people. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![justanotherdeaf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/77aa72/32.png) [@justanotherdeaf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/justanotherdeaf)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/18 "2011-06-03T21:22:59Z")
> [@TNWPsycho](#): > > WHat is the official stance for the Catholic church, as well as other christian sects, does it differ? > > Premarital sex? > > Marrying a divorcee? > > Number of partners? > > I remember reading somewhere (correct me if im wrong) that the bible does not have any marriage ritual in it, or say how to perform one. Rather you are married once you have sex. any “born again” / Jesus Saves type of church premarial sex: its something you should try to avoid as you can, but if it happen, its not the end of the world for you. although, if you have no guilt or shame that God design marriage to be an image of his plans, then the church will wonder about your salvation divorce: its depends. mixed opinions number of partner, same with premarial sex. if you done all this before trusting God to wash your sins away and accept Christ as your savior (who supposedly be Gods words in flesh of his plan to humankind) ALL your past and future sins will be erased . its the matter of how willing you will obey or you will feel guilt or some chastisement from him. but people will wonder if you were sincere about your sinner prayer. ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/19 "2011-06-03T21:26:17Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > It’s a joke, people. 🙂 I did like the joke, if that’s any consolation :). ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229/20 "2011-06-03T21:35:27Z")
There are some Protestant sects that frown on divorce. When I lived in the South, my boss wanted remarry after a divorce, and he actually had to ask several ministers before he found one who would officiate. It was more a minister-by-minister thing than a blanket edict, though. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christian-stance-on-sex/584229.md?page=2)