# Christians: I'm not impressed. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 8, 2001, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285 "2001-11-08T21:46:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f475e1/32.png) [@Lolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lolo)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/1 "2001-11-08T21:46:18Z")
silly Christians, myths are for kids. wake up and smell the coffee Christians, you’re religion is fading like fart recently set aflame, leaving only a vague smell of its pathetic existence. You’re all like a bunch of kids holding onto your favorite stuffed animal and it needs to be taken away from you. You need to grow up. ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/2 "2001-11-08T21:56:20Z")
Don’t eat ME! My brother will be along in a minute, and he’s much bigger and juicier than I am! ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/3 "2001-11-08T21:57:26Z")
Buh-bye. ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/4 "2001-11-08T21:59:13Z")
Ah yes, lessons from Lolo, that paragon of maturity and wisdom, we would all be much better following his examples of well-reasoned arguments that everyone on the board admires :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Daowajan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Daowajan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daowajan)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/5 "2001-11-08T22:00:09Z")
Counting down the minutes until **Lolo** gets his embarrassing ass banned: Five. Four. Three… ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/6 "2001-11-08T22:02:45Z")
Holy shit, dude. I’m not even Christian and this offends **me**! ---
**Author:** ![Abe\_Babe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ab097/32.png) [@Abe\_Babe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abe_Babe)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/7 "2001-11-08T22:05:25Z")
\*\*Christians: I’m not impressed. \*\* I think I can safely speak for most Christians when I say that the feeling is mutual. ---
**Author:** ![SisterCoyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@SisterCoyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SisterCoyote)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/8 "2001-11-08T22:05:39Z")
You know, the whole “myths are for kids” arguement never ceases to amaze me. Myths are quite critical; if they weren’t they wouldn’t extend everywhere in society the way they do - heck, half of the Urban Legends covered on Snopes probably fall under the “mythological” canon, if you choose to look at it that way. It’s been less than a hundred years since the age that changed our way of looking at myths. Of course, I don’t expect **Lolo** to know that. Probably doesn’t know the difference between _logos_ and _mythos_, either. (of course, to be fair, in that he’s no different than anyone who reads the entire Bible literally.} And don’t tell me Fairy Tales are for kids, either. They’re not, unless they’re the sanitized version Disney or your average book publisher puts out. Sheesh. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![seawitch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@seawitch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seawitch)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/9 "2001-11-08T22:07:33Z")
You think he’s bad _now_, wait till puberty hits. PS - Ten bucks says Lolo thinks this was a reasoned, impassioned, brilliant rant. The idiot. ---
**Author:** ![Asylum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/53a042/32.png) [@Asylum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asylum)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/10 "2001-11-08T22:07:57Z")
Oh look, another unsubtantiated claim. You are aware that there are over a billion Catholics alone in the world. Once you add in all the protestant denominations it would seem to be clear that christianity is not “fading.” Also let me get this straight: you claim the Marquis de Sade as a hero and then you tell christians to “grow up?” Grow up to what? Irresponsible sadists? In that case the whole world needs to grow up. Thank God you came along to clarify for seven billion or so people that we’re all immature. ---
**Author:** ![rushtopher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e47774/32.png) [@rushtopher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rushtopher)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/11 "2001-11-08T22:10:08Z")
[SUB]Allow me to add the obvious[/SUB] **Lolo** : I’m not impressed. ---
**Author:** ![Lolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f475e1/32.png) [@Lolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lolo)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/12 "2001-11-08T22:12:54Z")
Firstly, the Marquis de Sade being my hero… I was being facetious. I do not take pleasure in the pain of others. Secondly, Christians are still a bunch of idiots. You’re a drag on society. You’re deluded. It’s really quite pathetic. ---
**Author:** ![Reeder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Reeder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeder)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/13 "2001-11-08T22:13:41Z")
The pit is the place to do it. Not that trolling is acceptable in the pit. It’s just that the respondents who want to tear your head off can do so without fear of their standing on the boards. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/14 "2001-11-08T22:15:38Z")
Um, ok **Lolo** you know that you’re making yourself look like a total idiot, right? ---
**Author:** ![SisterCoyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@SisterCoyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SisterCoyote)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/15 "2001-11-08T22:16:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lolo \* > **You’re a drag on society.** By whose standards? Christians (heck, most religious folk, and even some non-religious folk like most of my UU Fellowship) spend a lot of time giving to the poor, setting up shelters. Salvation Army - believe that’s a Christian organization, innit? There’s a few others out there I can think of. Folks who live their beliefs. Which is one hell of a lot more than can be said about you, Dodo. (Yes, I’m succumbing to childish name-calling, but it’s so darn fitting that anyone who’d like to call me on it can go felch their deity of choice. Nyah. ;)) ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/16 "2001-11-08T22:21:27Z")
**Lolo** , you pathetic troll, you are giving us atheists a bad name. Please go away. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/17 "2001-11-08T22:24:10Z")
Um, cite, young man? Or at the very least, a thoughtful, reasoned, factually-based support for this view? Don’t worry, I’ll wait. ---
**Author:** ![Lolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f475e1/32.png) [@Lolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lolo)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/18 "2001-11-08T22:24:52Z")
that’s it I’m gone and yes, I was mostly being a troll. hugs and kisses and best of wishes hey, when you’re bored what else is there to do? stupid… fucking… christians I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General I am the very model of a modern Major-General, I’ve information vegetable, animal, and mineral, I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical, From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical; I’m very well acquainted too with matters mathematical, I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical, About binomial theorem I’m teeming with a lot o’ news— With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse. I’m very good at integral and differential calculus, I know the scientific names of beings animalculous; In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General. I know our mythic history, King Arthur’s and Sir Caradoc’s, I answer hard acrostics, I’ve a pretty taste for paradox, I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus, In conics I can floor peculiarities parablous. I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies, I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes, Then I can hum a fugue of which I’ve heard the music’s din afore, And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore. Then I can write a washing bill in Balylonic cuneiform, And tell you every detail of Caractacus’s uniform; In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General. In fact, when I know what is meant by “mamelon” and “ravelin”, When I can tell at sight a chassepôt rifle from a javelin, When such affairs as sorties and surprises I’m more wary at, And when I know precisely what is meant by “commissariat”, When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery, When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery: In short, when I’ve a smattering of elemental strategy, You’ll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee— For my military knowledge, though I’m plucky and adventury, Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century; But still in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General. ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/19 "2001-11-08T22:27:35Z")
Let me guess… you got kicked out of CCD for wearing a Marilyn Manson T-shirt, didn’t you? May I make some other guesses? Of course I can. You got busted for eating cat-poop in the sandbox… twice. _The Exorcist_ really, _really_ scared you back when you were a kid, two years ago. “Suicide Solution” is the most clever play on words you’ve ever heard. You want to cry at the end of Diablo II. Some day, you’re actually going to try to _read_ de Sade, instead of just watch the film over and over. And remember, kid, it’s “day sod,” not “dee sharday.” ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2001, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285/20 "2001-11-08T22:27:54Z")
> [@](#): > > I’m gone Truer words were never spoken. Yeesh! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christians-im-not-impressed/92285.md?page=2)