# Christmas songs that have nothing to do with Christmas **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 24, 2012, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989 "2012-11-24T16:19:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/41 "2012-11-28T21:28:01Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > I rewrote the final verse last year. We’ll take it from where the kid offers to do his Gene Krupa impression: > > \*…Shall I play for you, pah-rumpa-pum-pum > on my drum? > > Mary nodded, pah-rumpa-pum-pum > It was a secret sign, pah-rumpa-pum-pum > Then Joseph grabbed my arm pah-rumpa-pum-pum > He dragged me from the barn, pah-rumpa-pum-pum > rumpa-pum-pum, rumpa-pum-pum > Then he smiled at me, pah-rumpa-pum-pum > And fed me my drum.\* Me and my son laughed at this last night until we cried. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/42 "2012-11-28T21:42:44Z")
Two songs which get played very frequently on radio stations which go to “all-Christmas music” formats at this time of year, and which mention Christmas, but have no actual connection to the season: [Last Christmas, by Wham!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Last_Christmas) The song is about a lover who broke the singer’s heart; the only connection to the holiday is that she broke his heart on the prior Christmas. [Same Old Lang Syne, by Dan Fogelberg](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Same_Old_Lang_Syne). It’s about a chance reunion with an old girlfriend, which just so happens to occur on Christmas Eve. The only reason that the holiday is even relevant is that, because it’s Christmas Eve, they can’t find an open bar, and so, they buy a six-pack of beer and drink it in the car. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/43 "2012-11-28T21:53:55Z")
The two biggest abortions in musical history: Jingle Bell Rock, and Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree. I want to find whoever wrote those miserable pieces of shit and flat-out kill him. And if he’s already dead, I want to dig him up and kill him again. And I hear that shit played all the damn time. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/44 "2012-11-28T21:54:11Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > Well, there’s always Joni Mitchell’s “I wish I had a river” which, although it mentions Christmas, is about as much about the holidays as “Born in the USA” is about patriotism. I put Pretenders’ “2000 Miles” in this category too. > [@](#): > > Originally Posted by kaylasdad99 > > Then Joseph grabbed my arm pah-rumpa-pum-pum > He dragged me from the barn, pah-rumpa-pum-pum > rumpa-pum-pum, rumpa-pum-pum > Then he smiled at me, pah-rumpa-pum-pum > And fed me my drum. How about one of my mom’s favorites: We Three Kings of Orient are smoking on a rubber cigar It was loaded it exploded BOOM! We Two Kings of Orient are smoking on a rubber cigar It was loaded it exploded BOOM! I One King of Orient are smoking on a rubber cigar It was loaded it exploded BOOM! Silent Night… ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/45 "2012-11-28T22:51:19Z")
My favorite version of _Sleigh Ride_ is from the Boston Pops. > [@Zebra](#): > > Marshmallow World > > March of the Wooden Soldiers I believe the latter is from _Babes in Toyland_, which _is_ a Christmas production. How about “Count Your Blessings”? I think the only reason it’s included is because it’s from _White Christmas_, really. (I once taped an instrumental version off the radio that I loved when I was a teenager, but as it was on cassette, I’ve never been able to find it again. :() ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/46 "2012-11-28T23:33:44Z")
‘Winter Time’ by Steve Miller Band ‘Wintertime Love’ by The Doors ‘Hazy Shade of Winter’ by Simon & Garfunkel California Dreaming By Mamas & Poppas ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/47 "2012-11-28T23:47:50Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > ‘Winter Time’ by Steve Miller Band > ‘Wintertime Love’ by The Doors > ‘Hazy Shade of Winter’ by Simon & Garfunkel > California Dreaming By Mamas & Poppas Have you ever heard any of these in a Christmas context? Played on an all-holiday station, on muzak in a store, or on somebody’s Christmas album? I didn’t think so. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/48 "2012-11-29T00:33:28Z")
“Do You Hear What I Hear?” is about the birth of Jesus, but it makes no specific mention of him. …and it is also about the [Cuban Missile Crisis](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Do_You_Hear_What_I_Hear%3F). ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/49 "2012-11-29T00:51:31Z")
> [@](#): > > “Do You Hear What I Hear?” is about the birth of Jesus, but it makes no specific mention of him. Well, “A child, a child, shivering in the cold / Let us bring him silver and gold” seems like a mention to me, albeit not by name (though, then again, many songs about Jesus don’t name him). More problematic is that it doesn’t make any sense as a song about Jesus. If it did, then it’d end with > [@](#): > > Said the king to the people everywhere: > Listen to what I say! > Let us slaughter all the children under three years old > So they can’t challenge my kingship Or something, I can’t think of a way to make it rhyme. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/50 "2012-11-29T03:22:31Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Well, “A child, a child, shivering in the cold / Let us bring him silver and gold” seems like a mention to me, albeit not by name Frankincense and gold, sure. Myrrh and gold, even. But silver and gold? ---
**Author:** ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/51 "2012-11-29T06:28:49Z")
> [@tanstaafl](#): > > It’s the “Bright paper packages tied up with string” line that somehow qualifies it. Plus I think _The Sound of Music_ got aired a lot around Christmas for a while and that one song somehow stuck. I think it’s “brown paper packages.” Not so christmasy. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/52 "2012-11-29T06:29:07Z")
> [@jsc1953](#): > > Have you ever heard any of these in a Christmas context? Played on an all-holiday station, on muzak in a store, or on somebody’s Christmas album? > > I didn’t think so. Quite a bit more than: _Deck us all with Boston Charlie_ two of the songs **bienville** mentioned. but I did hear \*Walkin 'round in Women’s Underwear \*once… ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_A.Robrin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sam_a.robrin/32/14497_2.png) [@Sam\_A.Robrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_A.Robrin)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/53 "2012-11-29T08:08:08Z")
> [@jsc1953](#): > > Have you ever heard any of these in a Christmas context? Played on an all-holiday station, on muzak in a store, or on somebody’s Christmas album? > > I didn’t think so. It is true, though, that a lot of winter songs–if not these four–get played around Christmastime and are taken out of rotation on December 26, even though they’d have nearly three good months in season, simply because everyone has had their fill of Christmas and everything associated with it. ---
**Author:** ![Reepicheep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@Reepicheep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reepicheep)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/54 "2012-11-29T10:00:11Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Well, “A child, a child, shivering in the cold / Let us bring him silver and gold” seems like a mention to me, albeit not by name (though, then again, many songs about Jesus don’t name him). > > More problematic is that it doesn’t make any sense as a song about Jesus. If it did, then it’d end with > > Said the king to the people everywhere: > Listen to what I say! > Let us slaughter all the children under three years old > So they can’t challenge my kingship > > Or something, I can’t think of a way to make it rhyme. Said the king to the people everywhere Listen to what I say (listen to what I say) Let us kill, o kill the boys under three So they can’t challenge me (so they can’t challenge me) ---
**Author:** ![amanset](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8dc957/32.png) [@amanset](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amanset)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/55 "2012-11-29T10:15:00Z")
I maintain that “I wanna be your dog” is a Christmas song as it has sleigh bells in it. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/56 "2012-11-29T14:28:10Z")
> [@bienville](#): > > There is a subtle Christmas reference in the line “Even Grandma would appreciate though we lack the seven fish she ate . . .” pointing to the old traditional Christmas Eve dinner of the seven fishes.\* May I ask where is that tradition from, please? ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/57 "2012-11-29T14:43:43Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > May I ask where is that tradition from, please? Italian, I believe. My wife (of Neapolitan descent) brought a multi-fish Christmas Eve dinner into our Christmas tradition. We just trimmed it down to linguini w/ clam sauce and shrimp scampi. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/58 "2012-11-29T15:16:31Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Well, “A child, a child, shivering in the cold / Let us bring him silver and gold” seems like a mention to me, albeit not by name (though, then again, many songs about Jesus don’t name him). That line always makes me crazy, anyway. The baby is **cold** , and you idjits bring him cold metal as a gift?!? How about a frickin’ **blanket**!!! ---
**Author:** ![bienville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@bienville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bienville)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/59 "2012-11-29T21:19:13Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > May I ask where is that tradition from, please? > [@jsc1953](#): > > Italian, I believe. My wife (of Neapolitan descent) brought a multi-fish Christmas Eve dinner into our Christmas tradition. We just trimmed it down to linguini w/ clam sauce and shrimp scampi. . . . and here is the Wiki page: [Feast of the Seven Fishes](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feast_of_the_Seven_Fishes) There’s just not a lot that rhymes with “appreciate”. I didn’t have much choice in the matter. ---
**Author:** ![Bilbo1967](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@Bilbo1967](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bilbo1967)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2012, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989/60 "2012-11-29T21:48:05Z")
Here in the UK, Jona Lewie’s ‘Stop the Cavalry’ is definitely a Christmas song. Bar one line that says, “Wish I was at home for Christmas”, I just can’t understand why. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-christmas/641989.md?page=4)