# Christmas songs with parts that irritate me **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 11, 2017, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212 "2017-12-11T17:07:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![K364](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k364/32/5_2.png) [@K364](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/K364)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/81 "2017-12-12T21:27:54Z")
Hilarious rant against Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime” [https://www.golfdigest.com/story/wonderful-christmastime-is-the-worst-christmas-songand-quite-possibly-the-worst-songever](https://www.golfdigest.com/story/wonderful-christmastime-is-the-worst-christmas-songand-quite-possibly-the-worst-songever) ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/82 "2017-12-12T21:30:17Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Forgot this one: “Later on we’ll perspire as we sit by the fire / To face unafraid the plans that we made” > > They’re _your damn plans._ Why are you afraid of them? And what’s this about facing them? Get up from the fire and \*perform \*those plans. Life is short and you gotta get on with it. conspire, not perspire ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/83 "2017-12-12T21:38:15Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > I hate The First Noel. I always want to sing “So Where In The Hel-ell Is Ih-is-RYE-ell”? It’s Is-REE-ell dammit. Actually, it’s Is-RAH-el. Dammit. I’ve held a bit of a grudge against _Away in A Manger_ for the past 55 years or so. And not only because they set it to two different and incompatible melodies. No, my gripe against _Away in a Manger_ is about the passive-aggressive implied judgementalism that I felt was directed _right at ME_ in verse 2. **The cattle are lowing, the poor baby wakes, But Little Lord Jesus, no crying he makes.** _Gosh, little six-year old **kaylasdad99** , YOU sure weren’t that way when YOU were a baby. The slightest little sound woke you right up and you caterwauled so much that NO ONE could get any sleep! Why couldn’t you have been more like the Little Lord Jesus? He was the Son of God, you know. It must have been nice to have the Son of God for a baby. Of course, I wouldn’t know. I had YOU!_ Goddamned Little Lord Jesus. Who asked HIM to show up? ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/84 "2017-12-12T21:44:43Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > I like the [Porky Pig](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sh-w7GNAKl0) version. [That’s actually a comedian named Denny Brownlee performing as “Seymour Swine and the Squealers”.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1uHiT33jkA) ---
**Author:** ![Sir\_T-Cups](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Sir\_T-Cups](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_T-Cups)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/85 "2017-12-12T21:54:50Z")
2 pages in and we haven’t touched on the worst song of them all “Most Wonderful Time of the Year?” Not only is “hap-happiest seeeeaaaassson of aaaaallll” the most annoying thing on Earth because of the damn “hap-happy” but “mistletoeing” Mistletoe is a noun, not a verb! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/86 "2017-12-12T22:05:23Z")
The ending of “[Winter Wonderland](https://youtu.be/48rEUOJ9dQk?t=142),” by Connie Francis, makes me want to jump in front of a bus. ---
**Author:** ![chancetx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/cdc98d/32.png) [@chancetx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chancetx)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/87 "2017-12-12T22:17:03Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > What’s the deal with _My Favorite Things_? It mentions “doorbells and sleighbells”, and has a couple of lines about snowflakes and silver white winters, but otherwise, what does it have to do with Christmas? There’s nothing in it that’s specifically about the holiday, especially if you live Down Under. I’ve always wondered this too. My theories are: 1) The Sound of Music was often shown on TV around Christmas so people associate the songs with the holiday. 2) Music executives and artists looking to cash in on easy Christmas recordings kept looking for songs that weren’t done to death and decided to co-opt My Favorite Things since it had some generally winter-y lyrics. I lean toward #2 ---
**Author:** ![Eclipse\_Chaser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@Eclipse\_Chaser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eclipse_Chaser)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/88 "2017-12-12T22:30:45Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > I hate The First Noel. I always want to sing “So Where In The Hel-ell Is Ih-is-RYE-ell”? It’s Is-REE-ell dammit. Actually no. Everywhere else in the English speaking world it is Is-ray-el. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/89 "2017-12-12T22:30:52Z")
> [@Sir\_T-Cups](#): > > Not only is “hap-happiest seeeeaaaassson of aaaaallll” the most annoying thing on Earth because of the damn “hap-happy” but “mistletoeing” Mistletoe is a noun, not a verb! I thought “adult” was a noun but it seems to have become a verb. What a time to be alive. > [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Actually, it’s Is-RAH-el. I pronounce it Is-ree-uhl. But Is-rye-ell for the song. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2017, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/90 "2017-12-12T22:53:57Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > NOT a copyright trap. I’ve driven past it many times. It’s been a while, though, and I’m not certain the 20-foot high bust of Santa Claus is still there. No. It is a tiny shopping “mall” with a couple good restaurants and a couple nice places to shop, easy-on, easy-off the 101. ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/91 "2017-12-13T01:12:11Z")
I always wondered what a “wholly infanso” meant, too. ---
**Author:** ![Backwater\_Under\_Duck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ba8739/32.png) [@Backwater\_Under\_Duck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Backwater_Under_Duck)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/92 "2017-12-13T02:14:00Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > I thought Mary was a round young virgin. Sleeping in a bed of heavenly peas. mmmmm…peas. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/93 "2017-12-13T03:04:08Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > What’s the deal with _My Favorite Things_? It mentions “doorbells and sleighbells”, and has a couple of lines about snowflakes and silver white winters, but otherwise, what does it have to do with Christmas? There’s nothing in it that’s specifically about the holiday, especially if you live Down Under. > [@chancetx](#): > > I’ve always wondered this too. My theories are: 1) The Sound of Music was often shown on TV around Christmas so people associate the songs with the holiday. 2) Music executives and artists looking to cash in on easy Christmas recordings kept looking for songs that weren’t done to death and decided to co-opt My Favorite Things since it had some generally winter-y lyrics. > > I lean toward #2 It appears that a lounge singer named Jack Jones (_Red Roses For A Blue Lady_, _Wives and Lovers_, _Theme from “The Love Boat”_) was making a Christmas album (called, believe it or not, _The Jack Jones Christmas Album_), and some joker thought that song, with jingle bells jingling in the background would perfectly fit the mood. So blame him. ETA (interestingly, this was released the year _before_ the motion picture version of _TSoM_) ---
**Author:** ![aktep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f0a364/32.png) [@aktep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aktep)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/94 "2017-12-13T03:52:46Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > The problem with “Last Christmas” is that it _has nothing to do with Christmas!!_ > You could change the line to “Last Easter” or “Last Flag Day” or “Last Tuesday” and it would be the same damn song. This is one of my pet peeves: “Christmas songs” on the radio that are really just “songs that mention Christmas”. “Same Old Lang Syne” is the one that really grates on my nerves for this reason. ---
**Author:** ![golffan1963](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4af34b/32.png) [@golffan1963](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/golffan1963)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/95 "2017-12-13T05:17:10Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > Let’s face it. The Beach Boys just need to stay the hell away from Christmas music. Have you heard their version of “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town”, with big band orchestration intermixed with circus music? WTF? Worts version of the song ever recorded…which pains me to say…I’m a Beach Boys fan. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/96 "2017-12-13T13:31:57Z")
> [@chancetx](#): > > Music executives and artists looking to cash in on easy Christmas recordings kept looking for songs that weren’t done to death and decided to co-opt My Favorite Things since it had some generally winter-y lyrics. Yes, a lot of “Christmas” songs are really just winter songs. Which makes me wonder why it’s taken so long for Gordon Lightfoot’s “Song for a Winter’s Night” to make it into the radio rotation. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/97 "2017-12-13T14:04:40Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > NOT a copyright trap. I’ve driven past it many times. It’s been a while, though, and I’m not certain the 20-foot high bust of Santa Claus is still there. So to answer my own question, Santa Claus Lane is [quite some distance](https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Bunny+Trail,+Killeen,+TX+76549/Santa+Claus+Ln,+Carpinteria,+CA+93013/@33.1947634,-108.6718799,5z/data=!4m8!4m7!1m2!1m1!1s0x865ab4d462d99caf:0xe1d183ce3d3e2197!1m2!1m1!1s0x80e90e8c4505af41:0x851223e43a1a3ff0!3e0) from the Bunny Trail. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/98 "2017-12-13T14:23:59Z")
> [@Kelby](#): > > I feel dumb now but I actually looked up this lyric after hearing the song AGAIN this morning: > > _In the meadow we can build a snowman > Then pretend that he is Parson Brown > He’ll say: Are you married? > we’ll say: No man > But you can do the job > when you’re in town_ > > I had always heard “Carson Brown”…and wondered who the heck he was. On the Bob Rivers album of Christmas Song parodies, _I am Santa Claus_, there’s a parody of Winter Wonderland entitled “Walkin’ round in Women’s Underwear” that changes this line to “…and pretend that he is Murphy Brown”. which shows you how old that album is. ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/99 "2017-12-13T15:33:34Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > I thought Mary was a round young virgin. Me too! ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/100 "2017-12-13T15:36:07Z")
I’ve always wondered why Parson Brown was concerned about whether or not the kids were married. Did clergy in his day, on seeing teenagers (or young adults, or old adults) frolicking about, interrogate them about their marital status? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212.md?page=6)