# Christmas songs with parts that irritate me **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 11, 2017, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212 "2017-12-11T17:07:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/121 "2017-12-13T21:18:33Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > Mince pie instead of…uh, what is it you eat that you have decided everyone else should eat and that you scorn them for not eating instead? > A line from the heading of Chapter 15 of _Pudd’nhead Wilson_ springs to mind here. Nothing so needs reforming as other people’s habits. —Pudd’nhead Wilson’s Calendar Behold, the fool saith, “Put not all thine eggs in the one basket”—which is but a manner of saying, “Scatter your money and your attention”; but the wise man saith, “Put all your eggs in the one basket and—watch that basket!” —Pudd’nhead Wilson’s Calendar ?? I like good Mince pie. Hot with vanilla ice cream. I dont like pumpkin pie. I also like _some_ fruitcake. In fact a lot of people like fruitcake, it’s just a meme that no one likes it. But sure, enough people dont that randomly giving out fruitcake to everyone likely caused that meme. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2017, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/122 "2017-12-13T21:33:42Z")
I was referring to the first adage Mr. Clemens used. I get the clear impression that not only is there a widespread distaste for fruitcake, but a widespread notion that the people who do like it are mentally deficient, and deserve scorn, if not physical “correction.” ---
**Author:** ![TRC4941](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trc4941/32/6792_2.png) [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/123 "2017-12-14T15:14:32Z")
I can’t believe no one has mentioned the line “Happy Birthday” from Frosty the Snowman. It irritates me to no end. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/124 "2017-12-14T15:29:30Z")
> [@TRC4941](#): > > I can’t believe no one has mentioned the line “Happy Birthday” from Frosty the Snowman. It irritates me to no end. I can believe it, [given that that line isn’t in the song](http://www.metrolyrics.com/frosty-the-snowman-lyrics-christmas-carols.html). ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/125 "2017-12-14T15:52:20Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > . . . Bring the kid a blanket instead, okay? Don’t you know he’s shivering? Just stop at the Bethlehem Wal-Mart and spend some of that silver on what he needs. . . . All the illustrations I’ve seen have the magi coming at night, when all the stores are closed. The silver and gold can buy blankets when they open. And it’s easier to transport from the East. > [@ZipperJJ](#): > > Ever since I learned what a virgin was, . . . Ah, that takes me back. In the early eighties when my oldest was in kindergarten, he came home all excited about the Christmas Show they were going to be part of. Part of what he shared was “and my teacher told us what ‘round yon virgin’ means!” I put on a prepared-to-be-understanding smile, but he continued: “it means over there by that woman.” So I could agree that, yes, it means exactly that. > [@cochrane](#): > > I know that Comet had to stay home and clean the sink. 😃 _snerk_ I’m guessing that for a lot of people ‘half a dozen’ can be used as a non-specific, general sort of number. > [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Funny you should bring that up. I’ve fixed the last verse to make it more plausible as something that would happen when a woman has just given birth and the baby is finally asleep. > > \*Mary nodded (pah rum-pah pum pum) > It was a secret sign (pah rum-pah pum pum) > Then Joseph took my arm (pah rum-pah pum pum) > He led me from the barn (pah rum-pah pum pum) > (rum-pah pum pum) > (rum-pah pum pum) > > Then he smiled at me (pah rum-pah pum pum) > and fed me my drum. > > (right up my bum)\* > > You’re welcome. Love that. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/126 "2017-12-14T16:08:05Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > I know that Comet had to stay home and clean the sink. 😃 And Prancer went to town and blew a few bucks notthatther’sanythingwrongwiththat. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/127 "2017-12-14T16:11:12Z")
As for Comet, go to YouTube and key in Comet (song) in the box at the top of the screen. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![TRC4941](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trc4941/32/6792_2.png) [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/128 "2017-12-14T16:49:42Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > I can believe it, [given that that line isn’t in the song](http://www.metrolyrics.com/frosty-the-snowman-lyrics-christmas-carols.html). It’s the first line of that song from the movie. Sometimes it’s played on the radio that way and sometimes not. ---
**Author:** ![TRC4941](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trc4941/32/6792_2.png) [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/129 "2017-12-14T16:51:11Z")
I just heard Back Door Santa by Clarence Carter…the whole song sounds inappropriate! ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/130 "2017-12-14T16:52:47Z")
> [@TRC4941](#): > > It’s the first line of that song from the movie. Sometimes it’s played on the radio that way and sometimes not. Huh. I don’t think it’s usually played with that line around here. I don’t ever recall hearing it. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/131 "2017-12-14T17:30:11Z")
> [@TRC4941](#): > > I just heard Back Door Santa by Clarence Carter…the whole song sounds inappropriate! Now you know what became of Georgie Porgie. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/132 "2017-12-14T19:41:11Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > Mince pie instead of…uh, what is it you eat that you have decided everyone else should eat and that you scorn them for not eating instead? Being a misanthrope, I scorn most people for most things. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![TRC4941](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trc4941/32/6792_2.png) [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2017, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/133 "2017-12-14T19:52:20Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > Huh. I don’t think it’s usually played with that line around here. I don’t ever recall hearing it. Yep, just heard it in fact on an Amazon playlist. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2017, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/134 "2017-12-16T14:06:00Z")
Silly me, how could I leave out “I Saw Three Ships Come Sailing In” _Oh they sailed into Bethlehem On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day They sailed into Bethlehem On Christmas Day in the morning._ That’s what you saw, dude? Check a map. Yeah, um, no. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2017, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/135 "2017-12-16T18:19:43Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Silly me, how could I leave out “I Saw Three Ships Come Sailing In” > > _Oh they sailed into Bethlehem > On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day > They sailed into Bethlehem > On Christmas Day in the morning._ > > That’s what you saw, dude? Check a map. Yeah, um, no. One interpretation: the ships refers to the camels the Magi were riding; camels are/were called the ships of the desert. :rolleyes: However, tuna is called the chicken of the sea, so… . ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2017, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/136 "2017-12-16T19:08:47Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Fortunately, “O Come All Ye Faithful” is usually not performed with the second verse, > > _True God of true God, Light from Light Eternal, > Lo, He shuns not the Virgin’s womb; > Son of the Father, begotten, not created_ The version I was taught (and sang, at a girls’ school annual carol concert) was \*Lo, he abhors not the virgin’s womb \* Which is even better. Implies that abhorring wombs is the normal state of affairs. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2017, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/137 "2017-12-16T19:13:15Z")
All those years of Catholic school/church and I’ve never heard that second verse. ---
**Author:** ![CelticKnot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/celticknot/32/3392_2.png) [@CelticKnot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CelticKnot)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2017, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/138 "2017-12-16T20:09:27Z")
What Child is This? _This, this is Christ the King whom shepherds guard and angels sing Haste, haste to bring Him laud The babe, the Son of Mary._ These lyrics are not the chorus of the song. For some reason, they are treated as such, and meaningful lyrics have been forgotten. _Why lies He in such mean estate, Where ox and ass are feeding? Good Christians, fear, for sinners here The silent Word is pleading. Nails, spear shall pierce Him through, The cross be borne for me, for you. Hail, hail the Word made flesh, The Babe, the Son of Mary._ ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2017, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/139 "2017-12-16T20:11:28Z")
Wait a minute, that’s “Greensleeves!” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2017, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212/140 "2017-12-17T02:40:35Z")
I’m not sure which version of “What Child is This” is the original, but I agree with you that the “nails, spears” version is superior, even though that’s not the version I heard growing up. It’s good to have some reminders in there of what this kid is going to grow up to be and do. For similar reasons, I’m upset when people usually cut out the myrrh verse of “We Three Kings”. Speaking of which, I like everything about “We Three Kings” except for that one word: The magi were not kings. Call them sages, seers, astrologers, astronomers, scholars, wizards, wise men, whatever, but not kings. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/christmas-songs-with-parts-that-irritate-me/804212.md?page=8)