# "Citizen Zombie!" "Gone with the Zombies!" **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 2, 2003, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786 "2003-07-02T15:30:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![panamajack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/47e85d/32.png) [@panamajack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panamajack)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2003, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/81 "2003-07-03T20:27:02Z")
_Better Off Dead_ After contemplating becoming a zombie himself, a high schooler (John Cusack) instead saves the beautiful foreign exchange student from a family of zombies. He’s also chased around by a zombie kid moaning “Two brains!”. Features Zombie Skiing, too! _The Third Zombie_ As it turns out, Harry Lime didn’t die – he became a zombie! When he starts eating the brains of innocent children, his living friend knows what he must do. _Zombie Maguire_ -“Did you know the human brain has 800 calories?” -“You had me at ‘unnnnhhh’.” ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2003, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/82 "2003-07-03T20:43:47Z")
**As Dead as It Gets** - Featuring Jack Nicholson as a zombie with obsessive/compulsive disorder and a lousy disposition. He is gradually won over by Helen Hunt, and the movie ends when he overcomes his cleanliness compulsions and eats her brain with a filthy spoon. (Tears of joy stream down his face, along with bits of Helen’s cerebellum. Fade to black.) ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2003, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/83 "2003-07-03T21:43:05Z")
Hmmm … considering Elvis’s current state of not being alive, maybe we should combine this thread with [this one](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=195053) . Then you could update a previous post to something like **Unliving Viva Las Vegas** with Elvis in the Nicholas Cage role, only undead … ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2003, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/84 "2003-07-03T21:50:36Z")
**A Zombie and a Gentleman** The hideous reanimated corpse of Louis Gosset Jr. teaches Richard Gere how to be a man. Then he eats him. ---
**Author:** ![Drastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Drastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drastic)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2003, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/85 "2003-07-03T22:01:30Z")
**Zombies Don’t Cry** - a heartwrenching story of an emotionally troubled liver who is brutally not killed when his deadneck friends realize he has a pulse. **Band of Zombies** - war movies and series just translate well into zombies anyway. **Zombie Rebloated** - cheerful batches of dorm-room bong philosophy spiced into slam-bang-boom action scenes of kung-fu and trendsetting “zombie time” FX! ---
**Author:** ![Interrobang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/interrobang/32/17463_2.png) [@Interrobang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Interrobang)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2003, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/86 "2003-07-03T22:09:18Z")
_Moulin Zombie_ Not even tuberculosis could tear them apart in the end. _When Harry Met Zombie_ “You realize, of course, that men and zombies can never be friends.” _Zombie Say Anything…_ “Diane Court doesn’t go out with guys like you. She’s a brain!” “Mmmmm! Brains!” _The Zombie Breakfast Club_ A brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess, and a criminal spend Saturday detention together. Guess which one is eaten before the end of the day? ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2003, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/87 "2003-07-03T22:10:25Z")
Enter The Zombie ``` Lee rises from the grave and refilms this classic. He's still fast enough to rip out your heart and show it you before you die (and re animate as a zombie) ``` The Crow In this version, Eric doesn’t have to wait a year. He rises immediately and wreaks brain-eating vengance. ---
**Author:** ![greenteeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@greenteeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/greenteeth)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2003, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/88 "2003-07-03T22:19:47Z")
Just replace the reel of any movie with this one and you have an instant classic [ZOMBIE MOVIE](http://www.zombiecampout.com/) ---
**Author:** ![sajwalke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/edb3f5/32.png) [@sajwalke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sajwalke)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/89 "2003-07-04T01:47:37Z")
Reservoir Zombies: Blonde eats the cop’s brains to music from the Rocky Horror Picture Show. American Zombie X: A zombie learns the beauty of human life and tries to teach his younger brother not to eat brains. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/90 "2003-07-04T03:13:32Z")
_Song of the Zombie_ A racially biased musical by Disneyzombies extolling the virtues of eating live hares. _The Talking Zombie Heads: Stop Making Sense Tour_ A concert film featuring zombies burning down the house while playing alt/rock/reggae. ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/91 "2003-07-04T14:32:07Z")
**Zombies in the Outfield** “Hey! What’s that in the outfield? Oh my God!” ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/92 "2003-07-04T15:27:04Z")
anybody mentioned dinosaur zombies yet? or bend it like zombie, where you could get the actual david beckham into the titular role. and his foot breaks off when he boots the ball. (if anybodies already shouted these, i apologise. i couldnt be arsed reading the entire 2 pages of posts) ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/93 "2003-07-04T16:14:42Z")
> [@](#): > > a zombified Simon Cowell How would one tell the difference? _How Green Was My Zombie_: A teacher with an indomitable spirit brings literacy to a village of Welsh zombies. Who eat her. _The Zom-Bow Incident_: A courageous man stands up against a lynch mob out to hang an innocent zombie. Who eats him. _Zombie Magnolias_: The kidney donation scene alone gets it an NC-17. ---
**Author:** ![widdershins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@widdershins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/widdershins)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/94 "2003-07-04T16:17:17Z")
He gets nicer once he’s undead. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/95 "2003-07-04T17:18:57Z")
Oh, but darling, some of them are quite amusing–you really _should_ have arsed. [Or is it "should have _been_ arsed?’] ---
**Author:** ![Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/df788c/32.png) [@Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ben)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/96 "2003-07-04T17:47:00Z")
This reminds me of a game my wife and I play. If a movie is boring, we say, “You know what this movie needs? Godzilla!” We then pantomime activating the Godzilla call from the cartoon. It’s too bad it doesn’t really work, or “Gosford Park” might have been the best movie of all time. mooongmooongmooongmooong… ---
**Author:** ![11811](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/9d8465/32.png) [@11811](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/11811)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/97 "2003-07-04T19:00:07Z")
Eating Ned Devine A bunch of Irish zombies eat Ned’s brains after discovering he has the winning ticket to the Irish Sweepstakes. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/98 "2003-07-04T22:53:28Z")
_Imitation of Death_ Two mothers, a live one and a zombie, become friends, but the zombie daughter keeps trying to pass as “live.” _Yankee Doodle Zombie_ In this patriotic extravaganza, Zombie Geo. M. Cohan goes on a rampage, killing and eating the cast of several Broadway shows. _Little Zombie Caesar_ "Mother of mercy–this _isn’t_ the end of Rico! ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2003, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/99 "2003-07-05T05:11:48Z")
**Hedwig And The Zombie Inch** Trapped between male and female, between living and zombie, Hedwig seeks love and acceptance. **zoMb Butterfly** “I have a vision of the East where women with pure hearts die for the love of unworthy foreign devils. Then, rise again as zombies.” “Know that we embark on the most forbidden of loves…braiiiinsss!” “I am Rene Galimar! Also known as Madame Zombiefly!” **Different For Zombies** Prentice finds something interesting about Kim. He comes to realize that this beautiful zombie woman was a living boy he new in high school. Can Prentice overcome his own prejudices, social pressure, and Kim’s hunger for brains, and make their love work? ---
**Author:** ![Freyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freyr/32/5763_2.png) [@Freyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freyr)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2003, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786/100 "2003-07-05T06:32:23Z")
**Green Fried Zombies** A young women befriends an older woman in a nursing home and by doing so empowers her own life. While the younger woman thinks she’s hearing magical tales of the past, the older woman, who is actually a zombie, is really saying “EAT BRAINS!! EAT BRAINS!!” **Zombie Trek** The crew of the starship _Enterprise_ travels thru the galaxy, seeking out other forms of intelligent life. They, however, keep coming upon planet after planet full of zombies. For some reason, they eschew their high-tech weapons and use old-fashioned shot guns to fight off the zombies. By doing so, they violate their “sacred” Prime Directive. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/citizen-zombie-gone-with-the-zombies/185786.md?page=6)