# Civility and politeness and the don't be a jerk rule (or the lack thereof) **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [October 12, 2015, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479 "2015-10-12T21:37:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![jimbuff314](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c57346/32.png) [@jimbuff314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimbuff314)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479/82 "2015-10-15T06:56:21Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > […] I can’t believe I **have** to bring it up EVER! > […] Ditto. [Bolding added] ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479/83 "2015-10-15T07:00:41Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > As **Dex** said back then, they’re just fine… _unless they cross the line into being insulting._ Granted, where that line is is pretty subjective, but you’re mistaken when you say they’ve always been “just fine.” The very ruling you’re quoting plainly states that there is a limit. “ **Personal** insult” is what he said. Did Scumpup _ **personally** _ insult any mod? Mention any by name? I mean, it’s a fine distinction between demeaning a group and demeaning the individual members of that group, lord knows we don’t want the former to slip into the latter :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479/84 "2015-10-15T10:23:32Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > _REINING_ it in, dammit. It’s a metaphor for controlling draught animals\*, _NOT_ for running a realm. At least he wasn’t “raining it in”. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 10:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479/85 "2015-10-15T10:26:56Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > My suggestion: Mods can be pitted for moderator actions. Posters can be pitted by mods…HOWEVER…ATMB is reserved for politely discussing a mod decision in hopes of better understanding, a change of decision, etc. So if I wanted to tell DavidB that him modding me for calling someone a racist in GD makes him a dumbfuck, great. He can then join me in the Pit (or not) and call me a goat-raper. But if I want him to reconsider, or reconsider his position, ATMB is the way to go. > > I doubt that this idea is gonna go over well, but I wanted to put it out there as I think it would reduce a lot of poster and mod frustration. The Pit exists because sometimes you don’t want a civil point-by-point discussion, you just want to call someone a name. Let mods _use_ it (and let posters use it on mods as mods too.) This is far from the first time it’s been suggested. Maybe it will get a [del]fair[/del] new hearing this time. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479/86 "2015-10-15T11:30:09Z")
> [@FXMastermind](#): > > I would be banned forever from this forum. > [@FXMastermind](#): > > I would be permanently banned from the forum. _\_ Dammit, I need to tweak my Google Alert. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479/87 "2015-10-15T14:35:19Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > _REINING_ it in, dammit. It’s a metaphor for controlling draught animals\*, _NOT_ for running a realm. > > I can’t believe I have to bring this up twice in the same thread. In fact, since it’s the Dope, I can’t believe I have to bring it up EVER! > \*(or draft animals, if you prefer) You’d think we could rain in that grammatical error once and for all! ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479/88 "2015-10-15T19:08:11Z")
> [@engineer\_comp\_geek](#): > > The purpose of ATMB is to discuss board issues, and part of that is resolving problems here. Snark and sarcasm tend to be extremely counter-productive towards the goal of resolving issues. As such, I’ve decided to kick this around the mod loop to see if we need to make any changes regarding our enforcement of politeness and civility with respect to snark and sarcasm. > > If you have any comments from a user’s point of view, feel free to add them here. Terrific. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479/89 "2015-10-15T22:11:57Z")
Overall, I do think that snark and sarcasm are counterproductive to civil discussion. But, there’s no real way to express the irritation that some issues spark, because there’s no ability to use the Pit in the way it serves the rest of the board. I once again advocate making it possible to Pit moderators for moderating, but with the understanding that there is no requirement that anyone pay any attention to your rants. However, for constructive attempts at understanding and change you post in ATMB, but it must remain civil. This would actually serve as a safety valve, and allow tighter moderating in ATMB. As it is, there’s an undercurrent for the need to have a light hand in moderating remarks in ATMB, and I think it’s because there’s no ability to take it elsewhere. If people can vent in the Pit, they can then reframe their comments more politely in here. At least that’s my evaluation. I don’t think that’s been tried here. We’ve had all complaints about moderation in the Pit and required moderators to read the issues there, and we’ve had no Pitting of moderators for moderating, and that seems to have increased the tension. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/civility-and-politeness-and-the-dont-be-a-jerk-rule-or-the-lack-thereof/734479.md?page=4)