# Clarence, you bad bad bad thang. How happy you made me **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 29, 2021, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564 "2021-09-29T06:15:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/1 "2021-09-29T06:15:34Z")
2 days ago I was sitting on the grass watching the kids catch lightning bugs. Clarence the 'possum bobbled out from under the deck and sat right by my leg. I looked over and he wiggled his snout at me. I noticed his eartag was hanging half off. I gingerly reached and touched his ear and the tag fell off. I wanted to look at his ear and make sure it wasn’t torn or infected. I just dove in and and pushed his ear over to make sure it was okay. It’s was fine. He never moved. I decided to skritch his head. I petted him for several minutes. He liked it so much he rolled over and went to sleep. I petted his belly. I was kinda thinking I feel for a pouch. Then I figured a boy 'possum would not have one. I guess. The whole thing was quite strange. Then I petted his tail. OMG. That tail is weird. The skin moves without the under neath stuff moving. Strange! I’m thinking Clarence the 'possum is really kinda tame. Or too old to care. 🤭 ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 9:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/2 "2021-09-29T09:02:56Z")
Pretty cool. ‘Beck the possum whisperer.’ ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/3 "2021-09-29T12:29:46Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > The skin moves without the under neath stuff moving. There are other “tails” where the skin on top is not exactly connected to what’s underneath but I suspect you know that already. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/4 "2021-09-29T13:01:20Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > He liked it so much he rolled over and went to sleep. He was faking! Seriously, how cool is that? ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/5 "2021-09-29T18:14:57Z")
It’s cool. I cannot figure out how I accidentally accomplished this. It makes you think. How many times have I ignored or thought nothing of a chance happening like I had with Clarence? Now I have a friend who makes me smile every time I see him. How many chances have I passed up, like this? ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/6 "2021-09-29T18:21:19Z")
You have a Small Animal Field (a term that my college girlfriend coined, and applied to me). Small animals are just attracted to you. It also seems to work well with babies. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/7 "2021-09-29T18:32:18Z")
You’re so right. All babies and kids like me. Sometimes I hide in the treehouse from the grandwrex. I got just so many knock knock jokes. 🤭 ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/8 "2021-09-29T18:36:17Z")
> [@DesertDog](#): > > …but I suspect you know that already. Assumes Facts Not In Evidence > [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > He was faking! If only there were some idiom for this… ---
**Author:** ![Latimera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/latimera/32/497_2.png) [@Latimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Latimera)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2021, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/9 "2021-09-29T19:21:36Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > If only there were some idiom for this… Well done…I laughed out loud… ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/10 "2021-09-30T01:59:57Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Now I have a friend who makes me smile every time I see him. > > How many chances have I passed up, like this? Past chances are gone and not to be counted because they may not have become the friendship this one is. But treasure it and don’t be afraid to try again with some other critter. Except maybe a sidewinder or copperhead snake. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/11 "2021-09-30T02:14:25Z")
I want a crow. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/12 "2021-09-30T02:16:02Z")
I’ve always wanted a crow. StG ---
**Author:** ![nelliebly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nelliebly/32/5422_2.png) [@nelliebly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nelliebly)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/13 "2021-09-30T02:21:19Z")
I’ve always wanted a crowbar. I understand they drink a lot of Tequila Mockingbirds. All the animals love you, Beck. Leave your windows open, and I bet birds would fly in to help you get dressed. Unless they’re crows. They’re too independent. How’s ol’ Bayliss? Does he ignore Clarence, or have they become buds? ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/14 "2021-09-30T02:30:44Z")
> [@nelliebly](#): > > Leave your windows open, and I bet birds would fly in to help you get dressed. Unless they’re crows. They’re too independent. This reminded me of something that happened to me, when we were on vacation in Ireland in the '90s. We were in our room at the bed-and-breakfast, in the evening, though, it being summer, it was still light out. It was a warm night (by Irish standards), and we had the windows open in the room. There were no screens, because I guess they don’t care about bugs coming in. I was lying on the bed, reading a book, with an open window above and behind my head. My wife, sitting across the room, gasped, and when I looked at her, she was staring in my direction. “Look over your head, slowly,” she whispered. I did so, and discovered that there was a very large black raven, on the windowsill, just over my head. He was halfway into the room, staring at me and my book. 😃 After a few moments, he flew off, but he was clearly attracted by the Small Animal Field. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/15 "2021-09-30T06:23:19Z")
Or he thought you were Poe. @nelliebly Bayliss is fine. He does ignore Clarence. The Chihuahuas yap at him occasionally. He’s not bothered by any of it. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/16 "2021-09-30T19:55:05Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > discovered that there was a very large black raven, on the windowsill, just over my head. He was halfway into the room, staring at me and my book. 😃 > > After a few moments, he flew off, but he was clearly attracted by the Small Animal Field. Either that, or he was reading over your shoulder. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/17 "2021-09-30T21:45:04Z")
I wanna know why the Magic Flying Cats haven’t offed the big rat yet? You barely talk about them since that Mystery Dog showed up. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/18 "2021-09-30T22:51:21Z")
They are here. They cannot be bothered with all my pointless and mundane life stories. They’re real jerks most days. Hate the grandwrex. Hate the dogs, especially the Chihuahuas. Hate people. They only like dryer heat and liver treats. ---
**Author:** ![P-man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/p-man/32/3606_2.png) [@P-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P-man)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2021, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/19 "2021-09-30T23:09:50Z")
Good to see there are others who want a crow friend. ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2021, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564/20 "2021-10-01T00:48:24Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I want a crow. A noble goal. Those birds are smart. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clarence-you-bad-bad-bad-thang-how-happy-you-made-me/951564.md?page=2)