# Classic Songs That Glorified Pretty Rotten Behaviour ... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 22, 2008, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745 "2008-02-22T17:49:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2008, 11:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/101 "2008-02-24T11:13:29Z")
[QUOTE=phungi] Perhaps it is my interpretation, but I understand the song to be a call-out to unsuspecting lads merely looking for a place to stay (insert obligatory “not that there’s anything wrong with that” statement here) [/QUOTE] Not unsuspecting. Check the later verses: \*Young man, I was once in your shoes I said, I was down and out with the blues I felt no one cared if I were alive I thought the whole world was so jive That’s when someone came up to me And said young man, take a walk up the street There’s a place there called the Y.M.C.A. They can start you back on your way\* Sounds to me like the young guy has been tossed out by his parents, or beat up by homophobes – something that left him down on his luck. The “you can hook up” implication is less important to me than the “you’re not alone in the world” message. In fact, I have a hard time dancing to that song since I spotted that message. I keep picturing a suddenly-homeless kid, perhaps with a black eye or split lip, being reassured by a guy who’s been there himself. Not uplifting, to be sure, but not sinister either. ---
**Author:** ![j666](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de0a6/32.png) [@j666](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j666)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2008, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/102 "2008-02-24T12:20:38Z")
[QUOTE=kaylasdad99] Meanwhile, back in the twenty-first century, Carrie Underwood, Little Miss Jesus-Take-The-Wheel, herself, is demonstrating the cleansing benefits of turning your life over to the Lord, as she goes medieval on her boyfriend’s car. _I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped-up 4WD, carved my name into his leather seats, took a Louisville Slugger to both headlights, slashed a hole in all four tires…_ What would Jesus do, Carrie? What _would_ Jesus do? Probably cut his brake lines. Wait here, I think I have a hacksaw in my trunk. [/QUOTE] And …? I don’t get it, what’s wrong with that? Oh, carving her _own name_ into the seats! Yeah, that’s pretty dumb. The owner of the car is not only cheating on his woman, he’s getting a silly young girl who’s not used to alcohol drunk to ‘take advantage of her’. He’s also wearing cheap cologne. All around caddish behavior. I nominate this song as the Anti-Caddish Behavior Song. ---
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2008, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/103 "2008-02-24T12:32:50Z")
[QUOTE=Diogenes the Cynic] Speaking of BTO, I think “Share the Land” sounds kind of obnoxious in retrospect. _Maybe I’ll be there to shake your hand. Maybe I’ll be there to share the land that they’ll be givin’ away when we all get together now._ Who, exactly is going to be giving away this land and where did they get it from? Wouldn’t they have had to take it away from somebody else? And what would Randy Bachman do with the land if he had it? Are he and his band really going to get up at 5 A.M. and go pick rocks and do everything else it takes to actually work the land? Nothing against the band really (Bachman is actually a pretty good songwriter), but that song has some pretty shallow, fatuous hippie sentiment in it. [/QUOTE] The **Guess Who** did “Share the Land.” I always took it as a 1960s hippie tune about everyone living happily together. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2008, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/104 "2008-02-24T16:50:09Z")
Springsteen’s [Hungry Heart](http://www.brucespringsteen.net/songs/HungryHeart.html) is not going to win him daddy of the year prizes > [@](#): > > Got a wife and kids in Baltimore, Jack > I went out for a ride and I never went back > Like a river that don’t know where it’s flowing > I took a wrong turn and I just kept going [Henry Rollin’s Liar](http://www.asklyrics.com/display/Henry_Rollins/Liar_Lyrics/114499.htm) is full bore misogyny from beginning to end (but is still clever enough to be funny) > [@](#): > > you think you`re gonna to live your life alone in darkness and seclusion yeah I know you've been out there tried to mix with those animals and it just left you full of humiliated confusion so you stagger back home and wait for nothing but the solitary refinement of your room spits you back out onto the street and now you're desperate and in need of human contact and then you meet me and you whole world changes because everything I say is everything you`ve ever wanted to hear > so you drop all your defenses and you drop all your fears > and you trust me completely > I`m perfect in every way cause I make you feel so strong and so powerful inside you feel so lucky but your ego obscures reality and you never bother to wonder why things are going so well you wanna know why? cause I`m a liar > yeah I`m a liar I`ll tear your mind out > I`ll burn your soul I`ll turn you into me > I`ll turn you into me cause I`m a liar, a liar > a liar, a liar ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2008, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/105 "2008-02-24T16:57:26Z")
As a counterpoint to Henry Rollins [“I know what boys like” by The Waitresses](http://www.lyrics007.com/Waitresses%20Lyrics/Know%20What%20Boys%20Like%20Lyrics.html) is the classic prick tease song > [@](#): > > I got my cat moves > That so upsets them > Zippers and buttons > Fun to frustrate them > They get so angry > Like pouty children > Denied their candy > I laugh right at them > > I know what boys like > I know what guys want > I know what boys like > Boys like, boys like me > > Nah nah nah nah nah, > nah nah nah nah nah > > I see your sad now (I will let you) > Sorry I teased you (I will let you) > This time I mean it (I will let you) > Anything you want (You can trust me) > I really want to (You can trust me) > How would you like it? (You can trust me) > > SUCKER! hmhmhm ---
**Author:** ![Noel\_Prosequi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b19c9b/32.png) [@Noel\_Prosequi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noel_Prosequi)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/106 "2008-02-25T02:26:17Z")
I’ve always been conflicted by Elvis’s “Kentucky Rain”. Classic stalker territory. Seven lonely days And a dozen towns ago I reached out one night And you were gone Dont know why youd run, What youre running to or from All I know is I want to bring you home So Im walking in the rain, Thumbing for a ride On this lonely kentucky backroad Ive loved you much too long And my loves too strong To let you go, never knowing What went wrong What’s even more disturbing is the complete self pity thing, in which the singer casts _himself_ as the victim here. But its a great song. Pity one of the writers’ names is “Dick Heard”. ---
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/107 "2008-02-25T03:03:51Z")
[QUOTE=WordMan] There are countless threads that discuss songs portraying creeped-out behavior, but I always come back to **Possum Kingdom by the Toadies** , told from the perspective of a whackjob serial killer seducing his next victim “behind the boathouse, where she can stay young and beautiful forever” - I hate, hate, hate the fact that I love the groove and overall hookiness of this song… [/QUOTE] Is this confirmed? I always just thought he was going to, you know, deflower her. And then remember her fondly. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/108 "2008-02-25T04:17:32Z")
[QUOTE=Helen’s Eidolon] Is this confirmed? I always just thought he was going to, you know, deflower her. And then remember her fondly. [/QUOTE] I thought it was a vampire thing, which made it sexy to me. Or a serial killer thing…which…um, twisted person that I am, I also found kind of hot. ---
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/109 "2008-02-25T04:18:21Z")
Well, I didn’t imagine it was a particularly nice deflowering, dark secret and all, if that keeps it sexy for you. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/110 "2008-02-25T07:16:23Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] Bruce Springsteen’s “I’m On Fire,” though, sounds like a love song of a perv to a very young woman. Similarly, “Aqualung” by Jethro Tull. [/QUOTE] _Aqualung?_ How so? It’s a sad tale of a drunken bum dying in squalid misery. Yes, at one point he’s perving at young girls in a park, but it’s not a love song. How about _“The One I Love”_ by REM? Like _“Every Breath You Take”_ it’s one of those songs that many people think of as a love song because they only hear the hook. Describing someone as “another prop” who has occupied the time of the singer is perhaps a bit less charming. ---
**Author:** ![dmatsch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3be4f8/32.png) [@dmatsch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dmatsch)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/111 "2008-02-25T18:00:24Z")
[QUOTE=Zebra] Short People (the bridge seems to indicate that short people are, in fact, OK. They are not.) [/QUOTE] Bite me. ---
**Author:** ![Algher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Algher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algher)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/112 "2008-02-25T18:27:27Z")
For classic songs, Have Some Madeira My Dear - Limelighters have it on one of their albums I think. A nice song about an old man who gets a 17 year old drunk and screws her. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/113 "2008-02-25T18:31:43Z")
[QUOTE=DudleyGarrett] The **Guess Who** did “Share the Land.” [/QUOTE] That took me a couple seconds to [figure out](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Randy_Bachman), too. (It also didn’t help much that I am trying to forgot BTO totally.) ---
**Author:** ![Tool\_of\_the\_Conspiracy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@Tool\_of\_the\_Conspiracy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tool_of_the_Conspiracy)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/114 "2008-02-25T18:48:40Z")
[QUOTE=kaylasdad99] Meanwhile, back in the twenty-first century, Carrie Underwood, Little Miss Jesus-Take-The-Wheel, herself, is demonstrating the cleansing benefits of turning your life over to the Lord, as she goes medieval on her boyfriend’s car. _I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped-up 4WD, carved my name into his leather seats, took a Louisville Slugger to both headlights, slashed a hole in all four tires…_ What would Jesus do, Carrie? What _would_ Jesus do? Probably cut his brake lines. Wait here, I think I have a hacksaw in my trunk. [/QUOTE] As Steven Colbert said (regarding McCain’s lack of support from the religious right), “If there’s one thing we know about Christians, they do not forgive.” My own song contribution: “El Paso”, by Marty Robbins. The narrator sees his favorite “dancer” drinking with another man, and so he shoots him dead, steals a horse, and flees the state. I have a feeling that Marty Robbins wouldn’t meet the “upstanding, clean cut citizen” criterion, though; the lyrics site where I looked it up says that the same album includes _two_ songs with the word “hanging” in their titles. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/115 "2008-02-25T19:08:04Z")
> [@](#): > > For classic songs, Have Some Madeira My Dear - Limelighters have it on one of their albums I think. A nice song about an old man who gets a 17 year old drunk and screws her. Tony Randall sang it, too, back on Johnny Carson’s Tonight Show. ---
**Author:** ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/116 "2008-02-25T19:18:16Z")
[QUOTE=Freudian Slit] I thought it was a vampire thing, which made it sexy to me. Or a serial killer thing…which…um, twisted person that I am, I also found kind of hot. [/QUOTE] I second the vampire thing. He will show her his dark secret and she will stay young and beautiful. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/117 "2008-02-25T19:25:09Z")
[QUOTE=CalMeacham] Tony Randall sang it, too, back on Johnny Carson’s Tonight Show. [/QUOTE] Tony Randall all but lived it…his second marriage was to a 25-year-old…when he was 75! And she gave birth to two children before he died 9 years later! I hope I don’t have to note this, but I’m talking about the age differential only. There’s no evidence that Randall had to get his second wife drunk in order to marry him…or anything else. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2008, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/118 "2008-02-25T23:10:09Z")
[QUOTE=Don’t Call Me Shirley] Whoa, everyone has missed the most rotten behavior of all- cannibalism. [“Timothy” by the Buoys](http://www.lyricsdownload.com/the-buoys-timothy-lyrics.html) The singer is trapped in a mine with Joe and Timothy. They are “hungry as hell and no food to eat,” [/QUOTE] That’s certainly the impression the song leaves, but if memory serves, it’s never specified that Timothy was a human being. Some radio stations tried to defuse the song by suggesting that Timothy was a donkey that also worked in the mine. Notably, the song was written by Rupert Holmes, of “Pina Colada” fame. Which also glorifies bad behavior, by the way. ---
**Author:** ![Lust4Life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lust4Life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lust4Life)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/119 "2008-02-26T11:49:44Z")
The Bells of Hell go ding aling a ling for You but not for Me. A WW1 Brit Army song rejoicing that someone else has got killed and not the singer,many people assume that it is ironic. It isn’t. ---
**Author:** ![neutron\_star](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/51bf81/32.png) [@neutron\_star](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neutron_star)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745/120 "2008-02-26T12:23:49Z")
[QUOTE=BaneSidhe] Another song that comes to mind is a cover Metallica did of “So What!” [/QUOTE] Another song Metallica covered was the traditional Irish song (_lotta_ debauchery in that genre), “Whiskey in the Jar”: > [@](#): > > As I was going over the Cork and Kerry Mountains > I saw Captain Farrell and his money he was countin’ > I first produced my pistol and then produced my rapier > I said “Stand and deliver or the devil he may take ya” > I took all of his money and it was a pretty penny And later in the song: > [@](#): > > Being drunk and weary I went to Molly’s chamber > Takin’ my Molly with me, but I never knew the danger > For about six or maybe seven in walked Captain Farrell > I jumped up, fired my pistols, and I shot him with both barrels [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classic-songs-that-glorified-pretty-rotten-behaviour/438745.md?page=7)