# Classical chillout music in "actually really stressful" probe **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 7, 2003, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067 "2003-04-07T14:39:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/21 "2003-04-08T13:47:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by The Great Unwashed \* > \*\*Are you joking? > > I think you’re not. Gah!\*\* Of course **Francesca** wasn’t joking. There are heaps of jokes, both gross and subtle, in many classical works. \*\* > [@](#): > > I can laugh my way through Beethoven’s The Emperor. Strictly it isn’t funny, but it makes me laugh. \*\* It makes me laugh too, but that’s just because the opening theme sounds like “I Want To Be an Airborne Ranger”. Otherwise it’s not that funny. However, Beethoven’s symphonies are full of small chuckles. The opening of the Ninth, to pick an easy example, is an imitation of the orchestra tuning up. The insertion of a Janissary march smack dab in the middle of the last movement was a real knee-slapper by Beethoven’s standards. And of course “Scherzo” _means_ “joke”. I won’t even get into some of Mozart’s little japes. And we haven’t even touched on comic opera. \*\* > [@](#): > > But then some works are chock-full of genuine comedy – Listz’s Hungarian Rhapsodies can have me rolling on the floor, holding my belly with tears in my eyes. > > Maybe I amuse easily. \*\* Maybe. I like the piece, but I don’t find it _that_ funny. Chacun a son gout, and all that. ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/22 "2003-04-08T13:57:11Z")
Sadie’s _Gymnodpedia_ is truly relaxing in a sublime way, not just new age pap. Oh wait a sec. This is the Pit. Umm… Gymnopedia will relax you, you jerk! ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/23 "2003-04-08T14:51:09Z")
By the way, why is it called gymnopedia? Doesn’t that mean “naked boys?” ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/24 "2003-04-08T14:57:49Z")
It’s a question of pigeonholing - finding easy categories for things, mostly for marketing purposes. A colleague of mine can discourse for hours on the (to my mind theological) distinctions between “ambient trance” and “ambient techno-funk”. But anything remotely classical or orchestral - my _entire CD collection_, from Hildegarde of Bingen to Einojuhani Rautavaara - gets lumped, in his mind, into the category “classical”. Which, to him, contains slow “relaxing” stuff and fast “rousing” stuff. All very well for him, and I hope he’s happy … but when an ostensibly classical music station takes much the same attitude … something is wrong, there. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/25 "2003-04-08T15:16:49Z")
“You like classical music? So do I! Yanni is my favorite!” Yes, someone actually said that to me. A true jaw dropping moment. Of course, I love to fall asleep to the gentle strains of the Firebird fight scene, played at the proper volume. Earthquakes are so lulling. ---
**Author:** ![jovan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/0ea827/32.png) [@jovan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jovan)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/26 "2003-04-08T15:46:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by matt\_mcl \* > \*\*By the way, why is it called gymnopedia? Doesn’t that mean “naked boys?” \*\* Keep in mind that among some of his other works you’ll find: _Prélude flasque pour un chien_ (Flaccid prelude for a dog) _Embryons déséchés_ (Dried-up embryos) … and many more. Note that both of these pieces are otherwise lovely and might even be to some, yes, relaxing. ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Badger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dead\_Badger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Badger)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/27 "2003-04-08T16:04:49Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by jr8_ > The biggest problem underlying the “classical music is relaxing” statement is that it presumes that it’s all superficial background music **you don’t really have to listen to**. Which I suppose is fine if you’re listening to Telemann’s Tafelmusik, which is background music, but not if you’re listening to Beethoven, Mendelssohn, Bach, etc. Properly performed, there’s a lot of subtle nuances you’re supposed to notice. (emphasis mine) That’s _exactly_ what I’m talking about. Couple that with an idiot prepared to mutilate astounding works of art just to make them more insipid and less noticeable, and it’s enough to make me want to start posting fish to people. Heck, it’s comparable to painting over the Mona Lisa’s mouth with a grin to make her look happier. As far as humour goes, Debussy’s _Golliwog’s Cakewalk_ always makes me smile, but then AIUI pretty much all of his _Children’s Corner_ is gently poking fun at the composing styles of others… ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/28 "2003-04-08T16:24:57Z")
I love Mozart’s _Musical Joke_. And PDQ Bach rules! Personally, having been a music education major and a musician for many years, it’s sometimes difficult for me to listen to - let alone relax to - classical music, as I’m always _deconstructing_ and _analyzing_ it while I’m listening to it. “Ooo, there’s the French horn line… and a nice _leit motif_ there… say, nice countermelody!” I’m such a geek. Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/29 "2003-04-08T16:28:35Z")
Nothing puts me in a relaxing calm better than Barber’s _Adagio for Strings_. ---
**Author:** ![Marathon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7cd45c/32.png) [@Marathon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marathon)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/30 "2003-04-08T16:34:56Z")
My favorite to put on during a nice cocktail party is Berg’s _Wozzeck_, of course. But if I’m looking for a nice relaxing evening, I turn the lights down low, run a bubble bath, and soak while enjoying the strains of Corigliano’s _Symphony No. 1_. Occasionally, I’ll play Cage’s _4’33"_ on repeat until I fall asleep. Har, har, har. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/31 "2003-04-08T16:42:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\*Nothing puts me in a relaxing calm better than Barber’s _Adagio for Strings_. \*\* Ah, so soothing in its vein-opening goodness. ---
**Author:** ![FranticMad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c68b51/32.png) [@FranticMad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FranticMad)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/32 "2003-04-08T16:45:44Z")
Albinoni’s Adagio makes me want to jump off a bridge in despair, but this overplayed, sour confection is included in many “relaxing” music collections. Pah! ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/33 "2003-04-08T17:05:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FranticMad \* > \*\*Albinoni’s Adagio makes me want to jump off a bridge in despair, but this overplayed, sour confection is included in many “relaxing” music collections. Pah! \*\* I like the Adagio in itself, but one should remember that Albinoni’s contribution to the work consists of the bass line and six bars of melody; the rest was reconstructed as a stylistic mishmash by Italian musicologist Remo Giazotto in 1945, leading to this rather amusing clerihew: > [@](#): > > The Adagio of Albinoni > Is largely phony > And is a musical risotto > Cooked up by Giazotto. But speaking of soporific pieces, Philip Glass’s _1000 Airplanes on the Roof_ sends me right off – which is odd, considering I’ve made it through _Einstein on the Beach_ and Terry Riley’s _In C_ without any difficulty. And then there’s Krysztof Penderecki’s _Threnody_ – always a crowd-pleaser… :dubious: 😉 ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/34 "2003-04-08T17:11:58Z")
Yeah, but which of these classical pieces would best suit my melodramatic free skate program? ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/35 "2003-04-08T20:38:56Z")
Regardless of whether that’s a serious question or not, I’ve often thought that the music from Shostakovich’s ballet _The Bolt_ would be ideal for an ice skating routine. And [gratuitous plug] you can buy it cheap on Naxos, along with the Jazz Suites and his “Tea for Two” arrangement [/gratuitous plug]. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_great_unwashed/32/4791_2.png) [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 10:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/36 "2003-04-10T10:33:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by moriah \* > \*\*Sadie’s _Gymnodpedia_ is truly relaxing in a sublime way, not just new age pap. > > Oh wait a sec. This is the Pit. Umm… > > Gymnopedia will relax you, you jerk! \*\* I played _ **Gymnopedie No 1** _ late last night (an arrangement for guitar). I found it a lot of things – beautiful, strange, perplexing, witty, other-worldly, much more technical than its apparent simplicity, but _not_ relaxing. As jr8 said, _chacun a son gout_, which according to my dictionary translates as YMMV, but think about it, Satie wasn’t going to spend his time composing music for you to sleep by, was he? Don’t get me wrong, I thoroughly understand the temptation to hear those swaying major 7th chords as some sort of lullaby, but that’s not what is intended, every phrase asks questions that are meant to astound. At every turn dischords and suspensions are introduced that hang for an age – even its ultimate “resolution” into the minor key of the tonic makes the whole piece one big unanswerable question – What happens next? So please, _please_, if you find yourself “relaxing” listening to this, or that, piece of music try a quick slap to the face, and ask yourself “What am I missing?” PS: For those like me who said “Who?” here’s a short but entertaining (some might say relaxing) biography of [P.D.Q. Bach](http://www.schickele.com/pdqbio.htm) > [@](#): > > It has been said that the only original places in his music are those places where he forgot what he was stealing. ---
**Author:** ![Saintly\_Loser](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saintly_loser/32/4045_2.png) [@Saintly\_Loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saintly_Loser)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/37 "2003-04-10T15:09:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > **Argh. I hate people who say, "I like classical music-it’s very relaxing."** Yep. Quite recently a “date” (for want of a better word) came back to my apartment. There we were, sitting around, doing all the usual first-time-in-the-date’s-home stuff (you know, talking, having a drink, checking out the books and CDs, etc.) and she notices that the majority of the hundreds of visible CDs on the shelves are classical, and she says something like “oh, that’s so nice – put something classical on – it’s so romantic and relaxing!” So I put something by Gyorgy Ligeti. I forget what. It might have been Atmospheres. That showed her. Of course, I didn’t get any that night. . . ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/38 "2003-04-10T15:57:26Z")
**Great Unwashed** , if you do not know the glory that is P.D.Q. Bach, _ **RUN** _, do not walk, and buy many, if not all of his recordings. They are worth every hysterical penny. (My favorite is “Echo Sonata for Two Unfriendly Groups of Instruments.” 😃 ) Esprix ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_great_unwashed/32/4791_2.png) [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/39 "2003-04-10T17:10:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > \*\ ***Great Unwashed** , if you do not know the glory that is P.D.Q. Bach, _ **RUN** _, do not walk, and buy many, if not all of his recordings. They are worth every hysterical penny. > > (My favorite is “Echo Sonata for Two Unfriendly Groups of Instruments.” 😃 ) > > Esprix \*\* Thanks for the recommendation, I feel abashed, I knew of more than one Bach, of course, and at first thought PDQ was a typo, or netspeak (Pretty Damned Quick Bach), or something. Of course, if I hate it I reserve the right to come back and flame you. And it _definitely_ better not be relaxing. (If I was the sort of person who used smileys I’d put one here.) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_great_unwashed/32/4791_2.png) [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067/40 "2003-04-10T17:48:42Z")
Esprix (et al) Damn! Amazon (.co.uk) have either _The Ill-Conceived Anthology_ or _1712 Overture and Other Music._ – neither of which contains the Echo Sonata. Which would you recommend, for the clueless? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/classical-chillout-music-in-actually-really-stressful-probe/167067.md?page=3)