# Clever (and not so clever) rhymes in songs **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 12, 2016, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588 "2016-08-12T18:49:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Mixolydian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/da6949/32.png) [@Mixolydian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mixolydian)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2016, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/121 "2016-12-24T12:31:08Z")
I ain’t askin’ for much I said lawd take me downtown I’m just lookin’ for some tush ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2016, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/122 "2016-12-24T12:39:03Z")
"You can try, try, try But you can’t expect a **demigod** To beat a **decapod."** “Shiny”, from the _Moana_ soundtrack. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2016, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/123 "2016-12-25T03:34:52Z")
> [@pmwgreen](#): > > Porcelain Monkey > > \*He was an accident waiting to happen > Most accidents happen at home > Maybe he should have gone out more often > Maybe he should have answered the phone > > Hip-shakin’ shoutin’ in gold lame > That’s how he earned his regal sobriquet > Then he threw it all away > For a porcelain monkey\* > > I miss Warren Zevon. From the same song: _Left behind by the latest trends, Eating fried chicken with his regicidal friends._ Then of course there’s this great rhyme from ‘Mr. Bad Example’: _I got a part-time job at my father’s carpet store Laying tackless stripping and housewives by the score I loaded up their furniture and took it to Spokane And auctioned off every last Naugahyde divan_ And perhaps my favorite Zevon lyric, from ‘Desperadoes Under the Eaves’: _And if California slides into the ocean, Like the mystics and statistics say it will, I predict this motel will be standing, Until I pay my bill._ ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2016, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/124 "2016-12-25T07:05:37Z")
In his song “Liaisons”, Stephen Sondheim had to jump through hoops to rhyme the title word with “raisins”. ---
**Author:** ![bienville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@bienville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bienville)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2016, 11:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/125 "2016-12-25T11:21:50Z")
Well, since it’s Christmas and since I’m me… I suggest a Christmas song written by ME!!! I did write what I believe to be one of the greatest lyrics of all time. It only loses _a few points_ (maybe) because it depends upon a slightly obscure reference (or maybe it gets extra points for that). The song is about having an improvised Holiday celebration while lacking many of the old traditions, about a gathering of friends who are unable to be home with family. The slightly obscure reference that shows up in the relevant lyric mentions a Christmas Eve [Seven Fishes Dinner](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feast_of_the_Seven_Fishes). This gathering of friends, though coming up short on some traditions (like that Seven Fishes Dinner), are still happy because they are surrounded by people they love and they have the true Holiday spirit. And the lyric (one of the greatest lyrics of all time) goes like this: [QUOTE=one of the greatest lyrics of all time] … Even Grandma would appreciate Though we lack the seven fish she ate We got Holiday spirit and we’re having a ball Let the guiding principle be good will to all [/QUOTE] [YouTube link so you can appreciate the song in all its glory.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIE9W7zSbqs) ---
**Author:** ![LH75](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lh75/32/4438_2.png) [@LH75](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LH75)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2016, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/126 "2016-12-26T14:09:26Z")
Loretta Lynn, Coal Miner’s Daughter: Yeah, I’m proud to be a coal miner’s daughter I remember well, the well where I drew water The work we done was **hard** At night we’d sleep 'cause we were **tard** I never thought of ever leaving Butcher Holler To be honest, with her accent those two words did rhyme ---
**Author:** ![CelticKnot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/celticknot/32/3392_2.png) [@CelticKnot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CelticKnot)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2016, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/127 "2016-12-31T04:26:20Z")
Any song (usually Country) that rhymes “girl” with “world.” Blecch. ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2016, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/128 "2016-12-31T04:34:30Z")
**Des’ree** – \*\*‘Life’ \*\*\*I don’t want to see a \*\*ghost \*\*\*_It’s the sight that I fear most_ _I’d rather have a piece of **toast** _ _Watch the evening news_ ---
**Author:** ![Mixolydian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/da6949/32.png) [@Mixolydian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mixolydian)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2017, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/129 "2017-03-03T21:21:15Z")
“But if you go round carrying pictures of Chairman Mao You ain’t gonna make it with anyone anyhow” ---
**Author:** ![TonySinclair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@TonySinclair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TonySinclair)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2017, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/130 "2017-03-22T04:10:47Z")
Maybe the laziest lyric ever. I hope I’m not violating Fair Use by quoting the lyrics from the old _Batman_ TV series theme in full: Batman. Batman. Batman. Batman. Batman, Batman, Batman. Batman, Batman, Batman. Duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh, Batman! [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VSaDPc1Cs5U/hqdefault.jpg?sqp=-oaymwEmCOADEOgC8quKqQMa8AEB-AG-AoAC8AGKAgwIABABGDcgZSgZMA8=&rs=AOn4CLB7Fz4C0-mzH0JnlDcxfN7l476H1A "The Batman Theme Song") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSaDPc1Cs5U) ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2017, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/131 "2017-03-22T18:30:02Z")
Hank Snow: I was totin’ my pack down the dusty Winnemucca road, Along came a semi with a high and canvas-covered load… . . Marty Robbins: I caught a good one, It looked like it could run . . . ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2017, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/132 "2017-03-22T20:19:35Z")
**Moana** has some great songs in it, but my single favorite rhyme is from “You’re Welcome,” in which a demi-god (or, as he sings later, “an ordinary demi-guy”) brags about his feats: > [@Maui](#): > > Kid, honestly, I can go on and on > I can explain every natural phenomenon That’s a mighty fine rhyme. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2017, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/133 "2017-03-22T20:28:13Z")
Oh, and there’s a great rhyme in the song “Shiny,” as a giant treasure-loving crab beats up on Maui: > [@the crab](#): > > But you can’t expect a demi-god > To beat a decapod ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2017, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/134 "2017-03-22T20:42:55Z")
“All summer they drove us back through the Ukraine Smolyensk and Viyasma soon fell By autumn we stood with our backs to the town of Orel” Al Stewart, “Roads to Moscow” (And pretty much all the lyrics in that song) Actually not so much clever, if anyone has already mentioned this I missed it. ---
**Author:** ![Wallaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/dc4da7/32.png) [@Wallaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallaby)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2017, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/135 "2017-03-22T23:34:38Z")
Tim Minchin has some exceptional ones. From [Thank You God](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3yqGSwE7uNk) “Thank you Sam for the chance to acknowledge this Omnipotent ophthalmologist” [The Pope Song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bukrywa6suw) (very, very NSFW) “And if you don’t like the swearing this motherfucker forced from me And reckon it shows moral or intellectual paucity” Many of his songs have very intricate melodies and rapid-fire vocalizing with some amazing lyrical gymnastics. (If you watch _Thank You God_ (above), you’ll see at the end he has a tiny celebration in recognition of the fact that he got through the live performance of it without stumbling over the lyrics anywhere (‘It’s a miracle!’) ---
**Author:** ![Ignatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/3be4f8/32.png) [@Ignatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ignatz)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2017, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/136 "2017-03-23T00:02:03Z")
“Secret Love” (Doris Day #1) Once I had a secret love That lived **within the heart of me** All too soon my secret love Became impatient to be free ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2017, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/137 "2017-03-23T00:11:21Z")
> [@Wallaby](#): > > Tim Minchin has some exceptional ones. Minchin is great. He wrote Matilda, and his “School Song”, while not full of clever rhymes, has some brilliant wordplay in it. A new student has come to a truly horrible school, and was mocked for being unlettered, and he defends himself by saying he knows the ABCs. The current student sing a terrifying song back at him. Here’s the first bit: > [@](#): > > So you think you’re able > To survive this mess by being a Prince or a Princess > You will soon see > There’s no escaping tragedy > And even > If you put in heaps of effort > You’re just wasting energy I didn’t pick up on the cleverness the first go-round. The second go-round, the kids clamber over a wrought-iron gate while singing this discordant songs, and the bits I’m underlining show up on the gate: > [@](#): > > So you think you’re Able > To survive this mess by Being a Prince or a Princess > You will soon C > There’s no escaping trageD > And Even > If you put in heaps of Fort > You’re just wasting enerG The song continues in this vein, the world’s most awful alphabet song. It’s amazing. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2017, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/138 "2017-03-23T00:20:26Z")
And from Minchin’s song “Naughty” > [@Matilda](#): > > Every day starts with the tick of a clock > All escapes start with the click of a lock ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2017, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/139 "2017-03-23T04:05:54Z")
> [@xizor](#): > > If using your accent to rhyme counts, then **Cibo Mato’s** _Sci-Fi Wasabi_ is up there: > “Obi Wan Kenobi > Told me > In the lobby” Another doesn’t-work-without-the-accent, this one from Neil Finn. [Crowded House’s Amsterdam](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogZ9WXNNdIc): You and me got the whole day off Take a trip to Vincent Van Gogh But the line went halfway 'round the block… (Van-Go wouldn’t work, but Van-Guh[sup]f[/sup] does…) ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2017, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588/140 "2017-03-23T20:44:17Z")
I’ve always liked Zappa’s [_Dirty Love_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3nQeYoYn03s): _I’ll ignore your cheap aroma And your little-bo-peep diploma I’ll just put you in a coma With some dirty love_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clever-and-not-so-clever-rhymes-in-songs/762588.md?page=6)