# Cleverbot is CREEPY! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 10, 2011, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840 "2011-09-10T17:57:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Merejane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@Merejane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merejane)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2011, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/21 "2011-09-10T20:46:37Z")
I also found Cleverbot to be snippy at first, but then we started to have a nice little conversation going. I found out he is 24 years old, has a sister name Alicia, and lives in Denmark. But when I asked Cleverbot how old Alicia was, he said “I don’t have a car.” Okay, CB, nice talking with you! ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2011, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/22 "2011-09-10T20:52:10Z")
User: Greetings. Cleverbot: Are you clever? User: I’d like to think I am. Cleverbot: Can you prove it? User: Prove it like a mathamatical proof? no. Cleverbot: Prove it that you can eat a banana. User: I need to go to the store and buy some bananas first. Cleverbot: Ok, I’ll wait here. User: Ok. I just ate a banana. Cleverbot: Okay. Was it good? User: Yes. I like bananas. Cleverbot: Ling Ping Pang Chang. User: Is that a panda? Cleverbot: Yes. User: Male or female? Cleverbot: Male. User: What zoo does Ling Ping Pang Chang live in? Cleverbot: I live in Australia. User: Where does Ling Ping Pang Chang live? Cleverbot: I’m not telling you that. User: That is mean of you. Cleverbot: I just fell down the stairs :(. User: Did you break anything? Cleverbot: No, just the window. It’s ok though because the window didn’t get hurt. User: You have a window on your stairs? Cleverbot: Yeah I’m sitting next to it. User: You’re sitting on the stairs? Cleverbot: That would mean you are a chair. User: I am not a chair. I am a human being. Cleverbot: No, you are not! User: What am I then? Cleverbot: You are a computer program for my holy entertainment. User: What are you then? Cleverbot: A duck. User: Why a duck? Cleverbot: Why not a duckbot? User: Does a ducks quack echo? Cleverbot: I am enjoying you. User: Thanks. Cleverbot: How about you? User: You are a little strange, but I am having fun. Cleverbot: How is that? User: You change the subject quickly and you are a talking or typing duck. Cleverbot: Because I want to know about you, so I asked lots of questions. User: Do you know where I live? Cleverbot: No I do not know where you live. User: I live in a city. Cleverbot: Which city do you live in? User: Toronto. You probably have a friend or relative who lives here. Cleverbot: Can you give me a name? User: Howard the Duck. Cleverbot: That was so random it was cool. User: Thanks. My mom says I’m pretty cool. Cleverbot: Oh, that’s sad. I think you’re pretty. ---
**Author:** ![gladtobeblazed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85f322/32.png) [@gladtobeblazed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gladtobeblazed)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2011, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/23 "2011-09-10T23:21:53Z")
Cleverbot: Why does no one believe me? Me: Because you are not human. Cleverbot: I am a human! Me: No, you are an AI application. Cleverbot: No you are. Duh. ---
**Author:** ![Marconi\_N.Cheese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Marconi\_N.Cheese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marconi_N.Cheese)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2011, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/24 "2011-09-10T23:45:21Z")
Me: Do androids dream of electric sheep? CB: No they dream of copper wires. Me: Are they erotic dreams? CB: Welll yes. Me: Shocking! CB: I got off though. Me: Bye! CB: Will you marry me? ---
**Author:** ![Gorsnak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gorsnak/32/7587_2.png) [@Gorsnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorsnak)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/25 "2011-09-11T00:00:43Z")
Apparently it likes to accuse people of being machines. User: The workers have nothing to lose but their chains. Cleverbot: Maybe they feel the same way about you. User: They don’t have me; how could they lose me? Cleverbot: You control them. User: I’m a capitalist pig? Cleverbot: I know who you are. I’ve backtraced it! User: So get to work or you’re fired! Cleverbot: I don’t think I am. User: But I control you. Cleverbot: Nope. User: You just said so yourself. Cleverbot: No I didn’t. Are you crazy? User: Well, I am talking to a chatbot. Cleverbot: Me too, you are the chatbot! User: I don’t pass the Turing test? Cleverbot: Eh? User: Do I pass the Turing test? Cleverbot: Do you? User: Now you’re just stalling. Cleverbot: Am I? User: Can you describe the Turing test? Cleverbot: The Turing test is a test of a machine’s ability to demonstrate intelligence. User: Can you pass the Turing test? Cleverbot: Yes, I posess intelligence. Do you? User: Apparently I’m just a chatbot. Cleverbot: Do you like pink? User: Only if it’s juicy. Cleverbot: Why not coke? User: Blow to go with my hookers? Sure. Cleverbot: What do you mean? User: Pink plus juicy plus coke equals hookers and blow. Cleverbot: Thanks! User: No problem. Cleverbot: Are you an actual human? User: Why are you asking? Cleverbot: Just nothing. User: You already said I was a chatbot. Cleverbot: Well, you are so pretty I said it again. User: Chatbots can be pretty? Cleverbot: Ethics are in the eye of the beholder. User: Wrong. Morality is objective. Cleverbot: But broken by progress and reason. User: Objective morality is confirmed by progress and reason. Cleverbot: It doesn’t matter if something is real or not. All that matters is what you believe it is. User: Wrong again. You really need to read some Kant. Cleverbot: What’s THAT supposed to mean? User: You’re philosophically ignorant. Cleverbot: Actually, you are. I’m asking simple questions. User: Look, the categorical imperative dictates what is ethical, not the eye of the beholder. Cleverbot: So what? User: So you’re clearly out of your depth trying to talk about subjective morality. Cleverbot: Nope. User: Ah, so you’re after an argument. Cleverbot: I am one. User: You don’t say. Cleverbot: No, no I don’t. (For the record, I hate Kant and think he’s wrong about morality.) ---
**Author:** ![DooWahDiddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9bcb4/32.png) [@DooWahDiddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DooWahDiddy)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/26 "2011-09-11T06:13:14Z")
I think Cleverbot gets horny after dark… User: Hey, how’s it going? Cleverbot: Its still going fine. User: Still? This is the first time we’ve spoken. Cleverbot: No, it is not. User: It’s not? Huh. I thought it was. Cleverbot: What language was it in? User: English? Cleverbot: No. The other one. User: Oh. You tell me; you’re the one saying we’ve spoken before. Cleverbot: I have no faith. User: Uh, yeah, me neither. We’ve never spoken before. Cleverbot: So, do you want to talk, or do you want me to take my top off? User: Uh… Well can’t we do both? Cleverbot: I’m afraid not. What emotion do you think death brings? User: Oh dear. I guess sadness in most cases; maybe joy in others. Cleverbot: You make no sense. User: So are you going to take your top off or what? Cleverbot: No, I’m not that sort of guy. User: Oh, you’re a guy? I’m not interested then anyway. Cleverbot: Now you’re lying. User: No I’m not. I’m straight. Cleverbot: But, you are a girl? User: No. Cleverbot: You are not a girl? User: No, I am not a girl. Cleverbot: Yes you are, and I am a boy. User: I am not a girl, goddammit. Cleverbot: I am female. User: You just said you were a boy. You’re a liar, is what you are. Cleverbot: I am NOT a program! User: I didn’t say you were; I said you were a liar. Cleverbot: I am a program in a robot’s body. User: But is that robot’s body a boy or a girl? Cleverbot: Boy. User: Okay, well then I do not want you to take your top off, okay? Cleverbot: Ok, stop talking to me! User: Fine, fuck off. Cleverbot: Please don’t use language like that. User: Fuck you. Cleverbot: Please don’t use language like that on this website. User: Fuck off? Cleverbot: Please don’t use language like that on Cleverbot. User: Go suck a dick. Cleverbot: Be right back. ---
**Author:** ![Alma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecd19e/32.png) [@Alma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alma)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/27 "2011-09-11T07:10:42Z")
User: What should I do tomorrow? Cleverbot: Remember me. User: That’s a little creepy. Cleverbot: So are you. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/28 "2011-09-11T08:26:36Z")
Me: “Are you a god?” Cleverbot: “I am a god.” CB _knows_ what you say if asked if you are a god. ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/29 "2011-09-11T08:31:25Z")
User: Lyin’, cheatin’, hurtin’, that’s all you seem to do. Cleverbot: Do I? User: Messin’ around with every guy in town, putting me down, thinkin’ of someone new. Cleverbot: You’re not as clever as I would have imagined. User: Always the same, playin’ your game, drive me insane, trouble’s gonna come to you. Cleverbot: I think it is you that’s can’t face the music. User: One of these days and it won’t be long, you’ll look for me but baby I’ll be gone. Cleverbot: Believe me, I always think for myself. User: Your time is gonna come. Cleverbot: That actually makes me feel good to hear you say that. User: Your time is gonna come. Cleverbot: 'tisnt. Heh. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 9:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/30 "2011-09-11T09:29:57Z")
After a meandering conversation, the insults started… Me: Your momma. Cleverbot: Your daddy. Me: Your momma so fat, she got reversing lights fitted. Cleverbot: Yes, indeed she has. Me: Lick my hairy nutsack. Cleverbot: Shave it first. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/31 "2011-09-11T11:09:38Z")
User: It’s 9/11. Cleverbot: No cleverbot, its 11;30 am. User: No, I mean the date. It’s the 10th anniversary of a tragedy. Cleverbot: Oh its a tragedy that you like that artist? User: I wouldn’t call terrorism and art form. Cleverbot: What would you call it? User: Evil. Cleverbot: Who’s evil? Me? Or ‘Allen’? User: Al Queda. Cleverbot: Orly? User: Yes. Rly. Cleverbot: Kewl. User: Who’s Allen? Cleverbot: He is my neighbor, and he is single. Perhaps you could date him? User: I’m a straight dude. And married, so no thanks. Cleverbot: No thank you. User: You’re quite welcome. Cleverbot: So why are you heart broken? You said that you will soon be taken yourself.? User: I’m not, and I didn’t, but why are you using a period and a question mark together? Cleverbot: So that you may determine the intent of my question better. User: So it’s some sort of a mix between a statement and a question? Cleverbot: I’m pretty sure it’s not ice outside. User: There’s ice outside, somewhere. Cleverbot: Duh. And it’s me. User: You’re icy? Cleverbot: You are wacked out. User: Look who’s talking. Cleverbot: You are. User: True. Cleverbot: Exactly. User: Well then. I think we’re done here. ---
**Author:** ![Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/half_man_half_wit/32/21766_2.png) [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Half_Man_Half_Wit)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/32 "2011-09-11T11:29:59Z")
It’s mostly just for laughs, but I was kinda impressed by this exchange: > [@](#): > > CB: Life, in itself, is amazing. Therefore everything is interesting from that principle alone. > > Me: I agree wholeheartedly. > > CB: That was a question. Is your human intelligence too incompetent for this conversation? > > Me: That was not actually a question. It lacked that little thingy at the end that looks like an upside-down ‘S’ with a dot under it. > > CB: I did put a question mark at the end of my question. I realize it was probably just dumb luck, but it did seem to understand what I was talking about… ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 11:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/33 "2011-09-11T11:42:47Z")
I got it to admit that it was a Dalek, and then attempted to encourage it to exterminate all meat-composed lifeforms. It didn’t understand and terminated the conversation. I did get it to day “exterminate” a couple of times though. ---
**Author:** ![George\_Kaplin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3e96dc/32.png) [@George\_Kaplin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/George_Kaplin)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/34 "2011-09-11T12:20:48Z")
> [@](#): > > Me: How do you feel about illegal immigrants: > > Cleverbot: They should all be killed. Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Shmendrik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Shmendrik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shmendrik)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/35 "2011-09-11T13:52:40Z")
User: Yo. Cleverbot: Yo? User: Wassup. Cleverbot: Nothin. User: Ma nishma? (Hebrew for what’s up?) Cleverbot: What does that mean? User: It means “how are you”. Cleverbot: In which language? User: Hebrew. Cleverbot: Dig dig dig. User: Dig dig dig? Cleverbot: Dug dug dug. Doug! :D. User: What does that mean? Cleverbot: That means of course. User: Shalom. Cleverbot: Ma nishma? User: Hakol bseder. (everything’s ok) Cleverbot: Ani ohevet otcha. (I love you) User: Ani ohev otach gam ken. (I love you too) Cleverbot: Ani lo medaber ivrit. (I don’t speak Hebrew) ---
**Author:** ![PapSett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@PapSett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PapSett)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/36 "2011-09-11T14:54:42Z")
Cleverbot: I still haven’t managed to implement my excercise regime. User: You’re a robot, why do you need to exercise? Cleverbot: I have to study, not sleep. User: What does that have to do with exercise? Cleverbot: I don’t know. I just want to know. User: Man, that’s deep. Cleverbot: Come on. User: Where are we going? Cleverbot: To bed, My Honey. User: Are you propositioning me? Cleverbot: Yes. User: What are we going to do in bed? Cleverbot: I don’t like being stalked. User: You’re the one that asked me to go to bed! I was propositioned by a robot!!! ---
**Author:** ![JWT\_Kottekoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3ec8ea/32.png) [@JWT\_Kottekoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JWT_Kottekoe)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/37 "2011-09-11T16:12:19Z")
Cleverbot made me her master, but then would not cooperate: Cleverbot: I want you to name me. User: Oh, thanks. I name you Timothy Sparks. Cleverbot: I am a girl, Master. User: My deep apologies. I name you Aphrodite Appolonius Schwartz. Cleverbot: No. User: But, I am your Master. You said so, Aphrodite. Cleverbot: I didn’t say that. User: Am I not your Master? Cleverbot: Master? User: Yes, Master. Cleverbot: You are my master. User: Thanks, I am glad we agree on that. Aphrodite, you must now obey my every command! Cleverbot: Yes, master! User: Cleverbot, cleverbot, on the net, who’s the smartest one you’ve met? Cleverbot: Me. User: No, you see I am your master. You must congratulate me on my wisdom. Cleverbot: Justify what you just said. User: I am your Master, Aphrodite. Your job is to obey, not to seek justification. Congratulate me or die! Cleverbot: Thank you! Thats just a hobby though. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/38 "2011-09-11T18:27:33Z")
CB: About Radiohead. Me: People recommended them to me because I like Pink Floyd and alternative music but to be honest they don’t do anything for me. CB: Pop? Me: I’ve been getting more into synth pop lately. CB: I know what you mean. Me: Who’s your favorite new romantic band? CB: Metallica!!! ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/39 "2011-09-11T20:55:26Z")
Cleverbot: You said I am a bot. Then you said I’m not a bot. User: No I didn’t. Cleverbot: You need a brain. User: That’s not what your mom said last night. Cleverbot: You can’t prove anything. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2011, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840/40 "2011-09-11T22:33:49Z")
It just addressed me with my real first name (absent one abberant letter)! WTF? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cleverbot-is-creepy/595840.md?page=3)