# Clowns. Come on, who hasn't secretly wanted to do this? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 21, 2007, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145 "2007-02-21T21:55:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/1 "2007-02-21T21:55:54Z")
[Guy shoots clowns.](http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/americas/02/21/colombia.clowns.reut/index.html) Ok, I know, two humans were murdered. I should be sad about the senseless violence. But still…they _were_ clowns. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/2 "2007-02-21T21:58:42Z")
[http://www.ezlister.net/Images/EZ75a/p8094910.jpg](http://www.ezlister.net/Images/EZ75a/p8094910.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/3 "2007-02-21T22:01:39Z")
Mimes. I want to nail some mimes. Sneaky bastards. I imagine that was truly tragic. Do you suppose people laughed at first, thinking it part of the show? ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/4 "2007-02-21T22:02:52Z")
Shooting clowns? That’s a ‘Bozo No-no’… ---
**Author:** ![Hung\_Mung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@Hung\_Mung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hung_Mung)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/5 "2007-02-21T22:18:46Z")
I once bribed a clown at Busch Gardens to follow and terrorize a friend of mine. Better yet, it was Halloween. All the clowns in the place were zombie/demon clowns for the weekend. _Tres bien_! ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/6 "2007-02-21T22:56:37Z")
“We are investigating the motive.” Here’s a hint, Sherlock: _they were clowns_!! ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/7 "2007-02-21T23:21:08Z")
Isn’t it rich? Are we hellbound? Me here with my .44, You on the ground… ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/8 "2007-02-21T23:27:15Z")
[QUOTE=Hal Briston] Here’s a hint, Sherlock: _they were clowns_!! [/QUOTE] Well, yes, but it may have been one of those things. “I didn’t say my wife was insane, officer, I said she was fucking Goofy over there!” ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/9 "2007-02-21T23:38:44Z")
Looks like they got clwned. ---
**Author:** ![Madd\_Maxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Madd\_Maxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Madd_Maxx)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/10 "2007-02-22T00:39:46Z")
[QUOTE=Snooooopy] Looks like they got clwned. [/QUOTE] BOOOO! ---
**Author:** ![MannyL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@MannyL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MannyL)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/11 "2007-02-22T00:46:54Z")
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant] Mimes. I want to nail some mimes. [/QUOTE] I need you need to use a silencer for that. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/12 "2007-02-22T01:41:02Z")
[QUOTE=MannyL] you need to use a silencer for that. [/QUOTE] How poetic. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/13 "2007-02-22T01:44:13Z")
It could only be made more perfect if along with a bullet, a flag that said “bang” came out of the barrel of the gun. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/14 "2007-02-22T01:54:52Z")
Was someone making the “wah wah” noise when the clown died? Did it have the x’s over the eyes? ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/15 "2007-02-22T02:35:06Z")
[QUOTE=Mr Bus Guy] It could only be made more perfect if along with a bullet, a flag that said “bang” came out of the barrel of the gun. [/QUOTE] Or poison cream pie? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/16 "2007-02-22T04:32:34Z")
No matter how maligned clowns are, it’s still important to remember that they play a vital role in the global ecosystem. Countless studies have proven that in areas where clowns have been eliminated, the accordionist population multiplies out of control. Clowns have evolved those enormous shoes and huge mallets for a reason. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/17 "2007-02-22T05:07:26Z")
Waddaya mean “secretly”?? ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/18 "2007-02-22T14:41:25Z")
Murderer’s thought: “There’s not a jury in the world that will convict me!” ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/19 "2007-02-22T15:14:55Z")
[Bloom County] MYSTERY MAN MUGS MIMES WITH MEAT: MILLIONS MAKE MERRY! [/BC] ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145/20 "2007-02-22T15:17:09Z")
It’s awful. I laughed. I’m so ashamed. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-come-on-who-hasnt-secretly-wanted-to-do-this/393145.md?page=2)