# Clowns in woods try to lure children with money, residents say
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [August 31, 2016, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567 "2016-08-31T14:27:24Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 4
### Author:  [@stillownedbysetters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stillownedbysetters)
#### Post date: [September 2, 2016, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/61 "2016-09-02T15:01:42Z")
_Isn’t it bliss? Don’t you approve?
One who keeps tearing around and one who can’t move
But where are the clowns? Send in the clowns
Don’t bother, they’re here._
I always thought this song was a trifle creepy, but in light of this story it just got creepier.
If someone were trying to lure childhood me into the woods for nefarious purposes, the very last costume they should be wearing is that of a clown. As a child I was frightened of clowns…and clowns waving big wads of cash would have sent me running in the opposite direction.
---
### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [September 2, 2016, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/62 "2016-09-02T15:05:28Z")
> [@stillownedbysetters](#):
>
> If someone were trying to lure childhood me into the woods for nefarious purposes, the very last costume they should be wearing is that of a clown. As a child I was frightened of clowns…and clowns waving big wads of cash would have sent me running in the opposite direction.
Cram it, clown!
---
### Author:  [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)
#### Post date: [September 2, 2016, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/63 "2016-09-02T20:26:25Z")
> [@stillownedbysetters](#):
>
> _Isn’t it bliss? Don’t you approve?
> One who keeps tearing around and one who can’t move
> But where are the clowns? Send in the clowns
> Don’t bother, they’re here._
>
> I always thought this song was a trifle creepy, but in light of this story it just got creepier.
>
> If someone were trying to lure childhood me into the woods for nefarious purposes, the very last costume they should be wearing is that of a clown. As a child I was frightened of clowns…and clowns waving big wads of cash would have sent me running in the opposite direction.
The perfect perpetual motion machine! I hate clowns so I run away, but I love cash so I keep going back.
---
### Author:  [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)
#### Post date: [September 4, 2016, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/64 "2016-09-04T15:30:02Z")
[The problem](http://www.nola.com/crime/index.ssf/2016/09/clowns_terrorize_second_south.html) [is spreading](http://heavy.com/news/2016/09/south-carolina-clown-sightings-greenville-kids-children-money-attack-ohio-police/). Clowns got knives!
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### Author:  [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)
#### Post date: [September 4, 2016, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/65 "2016-09-04T17:35:26Z")
> [@Biotop](#):
>
> [The problem](http://www.nola.com/crime/index.ssf/2016/09/clowns_terrorize_second_south.html) [is spreading](http://heavy.com/news/2016/09/south-carolina-clown-sightings-greenville-kids-children-money-attack-ohio-police/). Clowns got knives!
It’s an internet spawned prank that is going viral. If it continues, sooner or later someone is going to get hurt. Walking down the street or standing on a corner dressed as a clown is one thing. Luring children into woods, or chasing people with weapons, even if you don’t really intend any harm, is different. It’s stupid, dangerous, and illegal.
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### Author:  [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)
#### Post date: [September 4, 2016, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/66 "2016-09-04T17:48:14Z")
> [@Biotop](#):
>
> Maybe they are (gasp) illegal immigrant clowns. There’s your scary movie: _The Bozos from Brazil_.
Come on, man, are you Sirius? [Bozos are from Mali](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bozo_people).
---
### Author:  [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/67 "2016-09-05T03:02:17Z")
> [@Biotop](#):
>
> Police were looking for several clowns supposedly spotted in the area yesterday, but the only vehicle they saw nearby was a extra-small compact speeding away, and all those clowns couldn’t have been in that one car.
> **[Honk](https://pbfcomics.com/comics/honk/)**
>
> The Perry Bible Fellowship
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### Author:  [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/68 "2016-09-05T04:35:59Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#):
>
> Fuck, I’d take Pennywise over those losers anyday.
Maaaan, **Violent J** will fucking **murder** you. :mad:
> [@Leo\_Krupe](#):
>
> A clown ate my dingo.
So my baby’s in the clown? :eek:
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### Author:  [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/69 "2016-09-05T04:54:06Z")
If they let this get out of control, we could be faced with _Star Wars Episode II_. No one wants that.
---
### Author:  [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/70 "2016-09-05T05:43:22Z")
Worst horror movie director ever, Rob Zombie, has a new film called “31” coming out on the 16th. Since it’s about carnival workers, I have no doubt that evil clowns are involved. Or that they may be a connection between that and all these so-called creepy disturbances. You just really can’t put anything past a bunch of fanboys.
---
### Author:  [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/71 "2016-09-05T05:48:38Z")
Let’s just hope this doesn’t continue to balloon.
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### Author:  [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/72 "2016-09-05T18:04:39Z")
[Clowns now in North Carolina](http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/winston-salem-police-increase-patrols-clown-sightings-41875320).
They are migrating north. Someone stop the clowns before they get to Virginia!
---
### Author:  [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/73 "2016-09-05T19:43:02Z")
> [@Biotop](#):
>
> There’s pie on your face!
[What are you going to do with those pies boys?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4c-c9UGaC5o)
---
### Author:  [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/74 "2016-09-05T20:11:03Z")
Here Trump is worrying about innocent Muslims and Mexicans when we’ve got fucking clowns on the loose!
> [@Ambivalid](#):
>
> Maaaan, **Violent J** will fucking **murder** you. :mad:
Yeah, I’m [terrified](http://www.complex.com/style/2013/08/insane-clown-posse-without-face-paint). 😉
---
### Author:  [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/75 "2016-09-05T20:23:07Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#):
>
> Here Trump is worrying about innocent Muslims and Mexicans when we’ve got fucking clowns on the loose!
But Trump identifies with the clowns. He’s even got the hair.
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### Author:  [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/76 "2016-09-05T20:27:22Z")
> [@G0sp3l](#):
>
> cuz Poundfoolish is a silly name for a clown.
>
> Do non-terrible mimes exist?
they’re elusive - like unicorns.
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### Author:  [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/77 "2016-09-05T21:38:57Z")
> [@cochrane](#):
>
> But Trump identifies with the clowns. He’s even got the hair.
This Trump/Clown connection needs to be examined. Didn’t someone once say the Republican Party was a big tent?
---
### Author:  [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/78 "2016-09-05T21:57:01Z")
> [@Biotop](#):
>
> [Clowns now in North Carolina](http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/winston-salem-police-increase-patrols-clown-sightings-41875320).
>
> They are migrating north. Someone stop the clowns before they get to Virginia!
Maybe we need to use some proven pest control techniques. Maybe we can release some GMO sterilized males.
---
### Author:  [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/79 "2016-09-05T22:17:14Z")
> [@Biotop](#):
>
> [Clowns now in North Carolina](http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/winston-salem-police-increase-patrols-clown-sightings-41875320).
>
> They are migrating north. Someone stop the clowns before they get to Virginia!
Yes, Virginia, there is a clown…
Virginia to North Carolina: Send in the clowns!
---
### Author:  [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2016, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/clowns-in-woods-try-to-lure-children-with-money-residents-say/764567/80 "2016-09-05T23:21:54Z")
> [@Biotop](#):
>
> [Clowns now in North Carolina](http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/winston-salem-police-increase-patrols-clown-sightings-41875320).
>
> They are migrating north. Someone stop the clowns before they get to Virginia!
No, they will quietly slip through Virginia and work their way up the coast to Connecticut. Some will appear in California and Colorado, pursuing the alliteration. Gods help us when they make it to Kentucky and Kansas.
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