# Cold call extended warranty

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cold-call-extended-warranty/1001082>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [May 2, 2024, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cold-call-extended-warranty/1001082 "2024-05-02T21:56:31Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 2\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\
**Post date:** [May 10, 2024, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cold-call-extended-warranty/1001082/21 "2024-05-10T02:31:42Z")

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> [@Treppenwitz](#):
>
> For those of us who lack the skills to pull that trick, this also never fails:
> 
> Scammer (reading from script) “This is Microsoft Support - we’re calling about a problem with your computer.”
> 
> _“Which one?”_
> 
> “Your Microsoft computer.”
> 
> _“Which one? I have five”_

I tried that once; they came back with, “All of them.”

To which I asked, “Even the really old ones which aren’t connected to the Internet?”

:pause:

“Sorry for bothering you.”

_click_

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**Author:** ![Grestarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grestarian/32/3227_2.png) [@Grestarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grestarian)\
**Post date:** [May 10, 2024, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cold-call-extended-warranty/1001082/22 "2024-05-10T06:40:43Z")

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Lately I’ve been paying attention to the number that appears on the phone (one of the few things I think are good about cell-phones) and if I don’t recognize it I don’t even bother to answer. If I’m really impatient, I just push the voice-mail soft-button. It’s an election year so I’m not in the mood to respond to surveyors asking my opinions on hot-button issues.

But I used to have fun with it. If I didn’t recognize the number I’d answer in Japanese or Russian or Spanish or Chinese (all of which I happen to speak at least well enough to answer the phone properly). And if I was in a really playful mood I would answer, “This is {fake name} in IT what is your emergency?”

First off, such a long phrase upon picking up the line tends to confuse the robo-calling software. If it’s a real person, the response is often something like “Uhhh…hello?”

To which I repeat “This is {name} in IT, what is your emergency?”

“Am I calling a business?”

“Yes. This is an IT emergency phone number. I handle network and database problems and the phone company routes the charges through the callers’ phone bills. Do you have a network or database emergency?”

The callers have never stayed on more than 5 seconds after that, but I’m sure I could ad-lib something about getting the caller’s name, IP address, and call-back number.

For a couple of the car warranty calls I would play the caller and tell them that I needed to reinsure my Suzuki.  
“Oh, an old Samurai four-wheeler? We can do that.”  
“No, it’s an old VX800”  
“Well, let me look that up…” they tend to hang up when they realize it’s a 1980’s motorcycle.

—G!

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