# Coldfire I was having fun you cranky...
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [December 16, 2002, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973 "2002-12-16T00:03:10Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 3
### Author:  [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 11:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/41 "2002-12-16T11:42:46Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Erroneous \*
> \*\*'Twas I. It was quite an undertaking. I’d post a link, but that thread was closed for bandwidth-related reasons too, and I don’t want to anger the Gods…er, mods. Although, like **jjimm** , I don’t quite understand how smiley art is a bandwidth burden. \*\*
I think it has more to do with the fact that the administrators don’t want people to get ideas of how to screw around with the coding. We used to have animated smilies, but I seem to remember that some people opalcat got a little too clever in making the little bodiless heads jump through hoops, in addition to other coding stuff. Result: no more animated smilies.
Disclaimer: I’m just going by what I remember what _seemed_ to have happened–If I got some part of this SDMB history wrong . . . I don’t care. 😃
---
### Author:  [@Bob\_Scene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bob_Scene)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/42 "2002-12-16T12:01:51Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by sailor \*
> \*\*They might as well get irritated over the fact that I wear the belt on my pants two holes too tight. How about that? \*\*
How **DARE** you! That sounds **SO** uncomfortable!
**I DEMAND THAT YOU LOOSEN YOUR BELT RIGHT THIS INSTANT!**
---
### Author:  [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/43 "2002-12-16T12:30:52Z")
**Demostylus** , I put it to you that your assertion is correct, but for the wrong reason.
AFAIK, this is what happens:
**Browser:** Please can I have such-and-such a page.
**Server:** Here’s the HTML.
**Browser:** Thanks, OK, here’s lots of guff and tables and whatnot that I’m parsing. Oh, here’s an image:
```auto
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/images/smilies/biggrin.gif
```
Do I have it in my cache? I don’t? Oh seeerrrvveeeer, please can I have that biggrin.gif?
**Server:** Sure, here you go.
**Browser:** Thanks. I’ll display it now.
Oh, here’s an image:
```auto
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/images/smilies/biggrin.gif
```
Do I have it in my cache? I do? Great. I’ll display it now.
Oh, here’s an image:
```auto
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/images/smilies/biggrin.gif
```
Do I have it in my cache? I do? Great. I’ll display it now.
Oh, here’s an image:
```auto
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/images/smilies/biggrin.gif
```
Do I have it in my cache? I do? Great. I’ll display it now.
…etc. ad **Lobsang** infinitum.
Thus lots of smilies do indeed put extra bandwidth strain on the board, but purely because of the extra HTML tags, not the image being downloaded. Meanwhile, the constant checking of the cache is what crashes/slows down people’s browsers.
---
### Author:  [@Desmostylus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Desmostylus)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/44 "2002-12-16T12:40:03Z")
Yes, **jjimm** , you’re right. Assuming that you browser does what it should. I already admitted to “oversimplification”.
---
### Author:  [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/45 "2002-12-16T12:46:38Z")
And I admit to having spelled your name wrong. Apologies.
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### Author:  [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/46 "2002-12-16T13:08:01Z")
Coldie just spent [several hours](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=150512) putting together a great big fuck-off Ikea wardrobe unit. That’s got to earn him a few tokens for a bad temper. 😉
---
### Author:  [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/47 "2002-12-16T13:35:06Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Tansu \*
> \*\*Coldie just spent [several hours](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=150512) putting together a great big fuck-off Ikea wardrobe unit. That’s got to earn him a few tokens for a bad temper. 😉 \*\*
Shoot- that would earn him a few murder sprees. Easy assembly my ass. . .
:mad:
---
### Author:  [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/48 "2002-12-16T13:39:20Z")
Meh. Threads with a very low information content get closed, even in MPSIMS. “Deal with it” would seem to be appropriate advice. **Coldfire** didn’t even sound particularly snarky about it, to my ears. (I suspect, if he’d really been annoyed, it would have shown … ) Oh, and you lost points for forgetting to call him a Nazi.
---
### Author:  [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/49 "2002-12-16T13:54:59Z")
Doghouse–no, we never had animated smilies. What we DID have, that somebody screwed up for everybody else, was the Image coding. First, a troll-in-residence used it to post a picture of a naked female centaur, and then somebody else quite innocently started a “post your desktop!” thread (it was one of those “it sounded like a good idea at the time” things), and by the time it got up to over two pages (100+ posts consisting of full-size screen shots of people’s desktops), it was crashing MPSIMS every day, all day, for several days.
So the Admin shut off the function.
Lobsang can be forgiven that first mass smilie post because it’s been a long time since the issue of mass smilies was addressed, and he’s only been here since March. The last time I remember the subject of mass smilies being addressed in-depth in ATMB was probably the summer of 2000. Maybe it should be added to the FAQ.
But IMO it crossed over from “harmless fun” into “selfish bullshit” when Francesca TOLD him:
> [@](#):
>
> Hate to tell you this, but mass-smilie posts are generally frowned on. They’re bandwidth-suckers.
–and then he went ahead and posted THREE MORE mass smilies posts, all of them spelling out “so there!” People who ignore well-meant good advice and post a big “oh yeah well fuck you” instead are in my opinion selfish bullshitters.
Coldfire’s an officious brat sometimes, but this time I support his efforts to shut down another brat.
Consider this a learning experience, Lobsang–suck it up, and move on.
---
### Author:  [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/50 "2002-12-16T13:56:20Z")
[Zenster’s: The Ultimate Straight Dope Art Thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=44684&highlight=gallery)
Don’t bump that thread BTW. A Mod will have your bollocks.
---
### Author:  [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/51 "2002-12-16T13:57:25Z")
or maybe they’ll have mine for posting that link 😉
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### Author:  [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/52 "2002-12-16T14:06:33Z")
Who was the person who recreated Picasso’s _Guernica_ with smilies?
(For heaven’s sake, nobody post the link! Just remind me who did it … )
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### Author:  [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/53 "2002-12-16T14:09:53Z")
That was a web page and AFAIR it was a bit of a cheat. A program that did it. Could be wrong though. I’m meant to be checking response times of a SAP server at the mo. as I’m on a course so don’t really have time to find it for you 😉
It’s pretty cool though.
---
### Author:  [@LolaCocaCola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaCocaCola)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/54 "2002-12-16T15:40:12Z")
Lobley/Lobsang is a time-tested, bona fide dipshit.
Actually, I can’t believe I even opened _this_ thread by him.
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### Author:  [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/55 "2002-12-16T16:12:32Z")
Well, hope springs eternal.
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### Author:  [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/56 "2002-12-16T16:49:33Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Lobsang \*
> **[It wasn’t doing anyone any harm.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=150564)**
Now that’s weird. All those smilies gave my Walkman static.
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### Author:  [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/57 "2002-12-16T16:54:49Z")
Thanks for the link 🙂 fantastic work!
Seems they build computers (or users) hardier back in 2001, not a single complaint in the thread?
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### Author:  [@Shadez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shadez)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/58 "2002-12-16T19:25:22Z")
I was just noticing that too, Iteki. Weird. And it was very pretty. 😉
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### Author:  [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/59 "2002-12-16T20:17:39Z")
Your first post after a year of membership, Shadez? I’d welcome you, but I’d feel silly. Still…
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### Author:  [@Daoloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daoloth)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-i-was-having-fun-you-cranky/142973/60 "2002-12-16T22:07:03Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Enderw24 \*
> \*\*Coldfire is a Cranky fucker? I wonder if her husband knows! \*\*
**Coldfire** is a female? Or have I been whooshed?
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