# Coldfire is an ass **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 18, 2001, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944 "2001-07-18T16:29:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/61 "2001-07-19T02:47:58Z")
Hey, **detop** , come hang out with me. I’ll make you a curry that would kill _you_. Then we could drink some nasty American beer. With clamato. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 9:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/62 "2001-07-19T09:07:49Z")
**"Ass Elf shot the food!"** 😃 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Diane \* > Hey, does anyone know how to treat cracked heels? Mine are icky! > \*\* Talk to [Sue Duhnym](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=70984) about what works on cracked heels. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/63 "2001-07-19T09:08:04Z")
> [@](#): > > No, no, no! It’s a multi-thousand mile long penis. Yes, and it’s blocking my driveway, STILL. And Heembo… come back! Bestow us with some more words of wisdom! Tell us how Unclebeer is a doody-head and how John Corrado is a stinker! ---
**Author:** ![Redboss](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8baadc/32.png) [@Redboss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redboss)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 9:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/64 "2001-07-19T09:10:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Blackclaw \* > \*\*I just thought this would be a great place to post my sig. \*\* Mods please move this thread to About These Message Boards. It could do with it. Thanks Redboss ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 9:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/65 "2001-07-19T09:44:26Z")
Gals, Is all you can talk about Coldy’s ass, or his driveway blocking wang? C’mon, there’s a whole loada Coldy out there. How’s the Beer belly coming along? L\_C, with 4 weeks to the football season, no tennis, no rugby, and not even Womens Vollyball on Eurosport… WHAT ON EARTH CAN WE TALK ABOUT!!! ARRRGGHHH!! ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 9:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/66 "2001-07-19T09:59:29Z")
> [@](#): > > WHAT ON EARTH CAN WE TALK ABOUT!!! Enterprise vs. Star Destroyer? P.S.- If you refer to me as “gal” again (not that I’m not in touch with my feminine side… it’s just that I have a penis, and all), I’m gonna tie you down with used dental floss and force you to listen to Britney Spears CDs. ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 10:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/67 "2001-07-19T10:03:34Z")
**vanilla** , I thought it was thousands of miles long? I mean, didn’t it reach from the Netherlands all the way to someone’s ass here in America? Or am I mistaken? ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/68 "2001-07-19T10:05:41Z")
Dammit…I hate posting at 3 AM without any Caffeine and not realize there was a second page. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 10:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/69 "2001-07-19T10:07:56Z")
Haha! Uncaffeinated moron! Bwahahahaha! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Tansu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 10:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/70 "2001-07-19T10:08:39Z")
_ **Ringggg!** _ _ **Ringggg!** _ _ **Ringggg!** _ It’s the big red phallic phone. Guess I’d better answer it. “Uh-huh. Nope. Uh-huh? SPOOFE’s made a comment relating to dental floss? Uh-huh. No, I’m too busy to comment right now.” ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 10:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/71 "2001-07-19T10:09:23Z")
If I have to seperate you two… Oh, that’s right - you fucking live together. FAGS! 😉 Esprix, who would know… ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/72 "2001-07-19T10:12:48Z")
Oh, blow me, 'Sprix. Please? ---
**Author:** ![Pnuk\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Pnuk\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pnuk_Guy)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/73 "2001-07-19T11:20:38Z")
jeesh. You’re all here talking about Coldy’s ass but no-one has mentioned that he has been vertically fucked in the pit. Is this a first? And that’s my next band name. **Vertical Fuck** ps. How the hell do I do small text on this board? psps. David Gray is a piece of poo. I hate him. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/74 "2001-07-19T11:30:20Z")
Spoofe, Esprix-you guys are so gay! d&r What can you guys talk about? How about how to be more LIKE Coldfire? ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/75 "2001-07-19T12:19:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > What can you guys talk about? How about how to be more LIKE Coldfire? > \*\* [Jan Brady]“Why is it always _Coldfire, Coldfire, Coldfire_?”[/Jan Brady] [sub]“Ow! My nose!”[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/76 "2001-07-19T12:36:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TwistofFate \* > L\_C, with 4 weeks to the football season, no tennis, no rugby, and not even Womens Vollyball on Eurosport… > WHAT ON EARTH CAN WE TALK ABOUT!!! ARRRGGHHH!! As long as it’s not [Rugby or Cricket](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=76892), I don’t bloody care. BTW **John** , I was going to mail you. You heard from Taters ? (been a while) ---
**Author:** ![zut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zut/32/2875_2.png) [@zut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zut)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/77 "2001-07-19T12:44:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Pnuk Guy \* > ps. How the hell do I do small text on this board? Going with the ATMB content of this thread: Surround text with “sub” and/or “sup” tags to make small text. For example: The tags {sub}texttext{/sub} (using square brackets instead of curly brackets) make subtext: [sub]texttext[/sub] Yes? The tags {sup}texttext{/sup} (using square brackets instead of curly brackets) make supertext: [sup]texttext[/sup] Yes? The tags {sub}{sup}texttext{/sup}{/sub} (using square brackets instead of curly brackets) make small, aligned text: [sub][sup]texttext[/sup][/sub] Yes? “Quote” this post to see how it’s done. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/78 "2001-07-19T12:45:23Z")
I got a postcard from her today “from Elvis’ Kitchen” with a picture of the King and a receipe for “Home Made biscuits”. Now I finally understand what those southerners were talking about!!! She’s doing great. Drop her a mail and she’ll get back to you when she can. Thanks Taters!! You’ll understand me when I tell you you have the greatest taste in tack. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/79 "2001-07-19T13:24:51Z")
I got the meat loaf version from the King Himself. 😃 I smell bacon… Elvis is innnnnn the kitchen! Hey, and Twisty? What was all that shit about a beer belly? You weren’t implying I’m _fat_, now were you? ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Kumquat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gary\_Kumquat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Kumquat)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944/80 "2001-07-19T13:38:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Coldfire \* > \*\*What was all that shit about a beer belly? You weren’t implying I’m _fat_, now were you? \*\* You know you’re fat when you can’t see your own penis. Especially if it’s several miles long. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/coldfire-is-an-ass/72944.md?page=5)