# Columbus or bust **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 14, 1999, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763 "1999-10-14T18:08:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 1999, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/101 "1999-11-06T14:58:00Z")
A few years ago, about 20 of us from a local message board met at a park for a BBQ. We did have those hokey, blue and white name tags, only we didn’t wear our own. We had to figure out who was who. The person who got the most correct won a prize. I don’t know that this would work for you guys though. We had a larger group and none of us knew what the other looked like (we had no website) other than vague descriptions. It was a lot of fun trying to put personalities to faces. Anyhow, have fun guys! I am jealous that I live so far and can’t come. ☹ Someone have a tequila shooter in my name. ## Without committing to organizing anything right now, (but I probably can at a later time), would anyone be intersted in a large gathering in Las Vegas next spring? \>^,^\< KITTEN Seven days of sex makes a whole week. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 1999, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/102 "1999-11-07T06:23:00Z")
Hey, if anyone has any last-minute questions for me, I’ll be on AIM and Yahoo Pager until about 5:00 this afternoon. I’m Drain Bead on AIM and Sibyl\_of\_Cumae on Yahoo Pager. ---
**Author:** ![Imthecowgodmoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Imthecowgodmoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imthecowgodmoo)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 1999, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/103 "1999-11-06T21:13:00Z")
I’m really really sorry guys, but I can’t make it. Now if we have another get together 'round x-mas time, then I can come, its just I have no vehicle to get me anywhere as of right now. That is of course, if you want to move everything to cincy… maybe its too late for that though, don’t ya think? Anyways, have fun, have a toast in honor to your bovine diety and give me all the juicy details when y’all get back. * * * “I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.”-- Calvin and Hobbes (\_\_) `\/-------\ `| |-----| | …c.c…c.c… ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 1999, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/104 "1999-11-06T21:23:00Z")
I wish I could make it.This is the first I read this thread. Pl could’ve drove us down,I don’t drive,and I live a few blocks from pl. Sorry I’m missing it. Please make the next one in Cleveland! ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/105 "1999-11-08T06:29:00Z")
Well? * * * \>^,^\< KITTEN Please tell your pants it’s not polite to point. ---
**Author:** ![Melatonin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b3f665/32.png) [@Melatonin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melatonin)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/106 "1999-11-08T06:41:00Z")
Well, Melatonin was a party-pooper and had to leave shortly after a lovely dinner at a restaurant with a pepto-colored bathroom. Although there I _did_ manage to hold on long enough to hear an interesting saga of goats and vermin. . . I’ll let the rest of the krazy krew relate their experiences when they manage to drag themselves outta bed. I have to hit the books before they start hitting me. ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/107 "1999-11-08T03:23:00Z")
W-E-L-L?!?!?!?!?!?! ## Anyone else thinking that they are home with hangovers or in jail? \>^,^\< KITTEN Please tell your pants it’s not polite to point. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/108 "1999-11-08T11:09:00Z")
Hungover? Yes, I certainly was. Jail? Not quite. I think Drain Bead has the details and will post them, I was in no shape to commit anything useful to paper. I do remember something about goats, though. * * * **Dopeler effect:** The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. ---
**Author:** ![Sucellus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Sucellus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sucellus)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/109 "1999-11-08T15:10:00Z")
GOATS? …everything’s kinda vague… Oh, I remember: “Seeing Eye Goat” Convention …and Otis trying to get a lap dance from one of them * * * Eagles may soar high, but weasles don’t get sucked into jet engines. ---
**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/110 "1999-11-08T16:24:00Z")
My humblest, most dirt-eating apologies to the rest of the OHio SDMBers who were expecting to be graced by my presence. I was out Saturday afternoon, shopping, and I twisted my ankle. You know, the one I broke and had operated on twice this summer. It swelled right up and hurt like an SOB, so I took a couple Vicodin and went sleepy-sleepy. So, tell me what all I missed?!?!?!?!?! P.S.-Rose, I’d happily drive you to the next meet if it is not in Cleveland. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/111 "1999-11-08T16:27:00Z")
I guess since I’m the only one who was actually able to walk home without a police escort, I’m the one responsible for the minutes. Unfortunately, I didn’t write much down. All I can remember is that the manager of the bar _really_ liked goats, and that Phil is still MIA. I hope he’s not waiting for us at Tommy’s. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/112 "1999-11-08T16:39:00Z")
Well, I do have those photos… * * * **Dopeler effect:** The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/113 "1999-11-08T16:55:00Z")
Melatonin got thrown out of the Blue Danube is what happened. It took 4 of Columbus’s finest to do it. She was shouting something like “Yep. Toe View Map.” and doing her rendition of the Dance of the Seven Veils on one of the tables there. While the police were there, they called the EMTs which was pretty helpful because Libby managed to get her fist stuck in her mouth. Well, Libby had a good reason for having it there… everytime she said something, The Doll, who’s about 3.5 feet tall, threatened to kick her ass up and down High Street. As this was going on, Sucellus was urging The Doll on, because he wanted photos of this. Otis was just hanging back, I think he was afraid that if The Doll wasn’t threatening to kill Libby, she’d kill him. UncaBeer was sort of love struck over one of the seeing eye goats back at the hotel, but he wasn’t gonna do anything about it as long as Sucellus (who looks like a demented Bob Ross, the former painter on PBS guy)) had that camera. ## Of course, your humble reporter was a paragon of virtue during the entire evening. Except for us all having to scrape up bail for Melatonin and keeping The Doll from beating up Libby and keeping Uncle Beer AWAY from the underage seeing eye goats, a splendid time was had by all, and Sucellus has the photos 🙂 **R** anger **J** eff \*The Idol of American Youth \* [Riders In The Sky](http://www.ridersinthesky.com) ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/114 "1999-11-08T17:16:00Z")
> [@](#): > > UncaBeer was sort of love struck over one of the seeing eye goats back at the hotel Well hell, now I’m jealous. * * * \>^,^\< KITTEN Please tell your pants it’s not polite to point. ---
**Author:** ![TheDoll](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c2a13f/32.png) [@TheDoll](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheDoll)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/115 "1999-11-08T17:41:00Z")
Well, I’m not dead, in jail nor was I hung over. My my my, the stories people can come up with. The only problem with the above story is, other than me not being 3.5 ft tall, Ranger Jeff and Sucellus were begging Libby and I to hop on up to Uncle Beer’s room and finish the fight there, nude and with something…jello? ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/116 "1999-11-08T17:50:00Z")
I was pudding, chocolate pudding. And Sucellus does not have the photos, I do. We’ll get them posted after I finish switching the goats from the pictures of me to the pictures of Otis and Ranger Jeff. * * * **Dopeler effect:** The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/117 "1999-11-08T17:55:00Z")
Arggghhhh…start a new thread for this, already! This one’s three pages long! * * * Uke ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 1999, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/118 "1999-11-09T06:44:00Z")
Pl,what do you mean,if its not in Cleveland? Whats wrong with Cleveland?heh heh. Great,just let me know,and we’ll gladly go with ya. ---
**Author:** ![Sucellus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Sucellus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sucellus)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 1999, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/119 "1999-11-08T23:56:00Z")
Dear Ranger Jeff, Obviously using a definition of “virtue” I was not previously familiar with. Baaaahhhhbrrraaaah says call her. “Demented” I can handle but “Bob Ross” is really hitting below the belt. * * * Rehab is for quitters. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 1999, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763/120 "1999-11-09T07:17:00Z")
Sucellus, What you missed was while we were waiting for you, I had to restrain Melatonin from leaning over the bar and refilling her glass herself. And Libby questioning everyone in the bar about how much money they’d want to perform deviate sexual/or just gross acts. We met in the Holiday Inn on the OSU campus. There seemed to be 2 conventions going on there. There was a group of what seemed to be frat boys, and some blind folks with seeing eye dogs. And lots of fruit flies were flitting around the bar. I think it was The Doll who asked where they came from. I explained about how when a mommy fruit fly and daddy fruit fly love each other very much they have this special way of hugging… Anyway, the ladies complained to the bartender about the flies and the manager came out, gave us the official Holiday Inn Manager Smile, and explained the origin of the drosophila invasion. Seems they were a souvenir from a convention of goat breeders a week or two ago. They had set up pens outside to house the 30 or 40 goats who had made the convention. And folks say Columbus isn’t metropolitan, huh? Well, we gave Phil and his lady till 8 pm to get there. Sorry you couldn’t make it, Phil, I would have liked seeing you and Leighann again. We left a note for him saying that we were going to go to Tommy’s Pizza 2 blocks down. We hadn’t left the parking lot when we decided ‘screw Tommy’s, let’s hit the Dube’. The Dube is a north of campus landmark, it’s been there forever. It’s got a great jukebox. TheDoll has this thing for either a song called James, or a song performed by a James. I managed to elbow her aside and selected some Muddy Waters, Velvet Underground and Janis. The menu is as eclectic as the Juke box, and Libby has it memorized. The food’s not bad at all; nobody ordered the $125 Deluxe French Dinner, which is a bottle of Dom Perignom and 2 grilled cheese sammichs. I just want to say I had a great time and it was a great mix of folks to get together with. * * * **R** anger **J** eff \*The Idol of American Youth \* [Riders In The Sky](http://www.ridersinthesky.com) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/columbus-or-bust/10763.md?page=5)