# Commercials that actually make me want to boycott the product **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 13, 2006, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340 "2006-07-13T16:20:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/101 "2006-07-19T04:34:15Z")
[QUOTE=Carm6773] Tampa Bay area: three words: [Bay City Plywood](http://www.baycityplywood.com/home.html). God, that laugh gets on my nerves. [/QUOTE] Those commercials are horrible and they’ve been around forever. Is there even a reason for their ape-like arm swinging and goofy laugh? I don’t know if these are local only but there’s always these ads on for 1-800-Ask-Gary. It’s a series of different ads with people talking about their accident experiences, in the one that plays the most the woman pronounce “ask” as “axe”. I hate that. If I keep hearing these ads I may want to axe Gary. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/102 "2006-07-19T13:53:25Z")
[QUOTE=Dooku] Of course, what kind of an idiot buys some exotic Blizzard concoction just before their flight, parks, carries it in, through security, all the way to the gate, etc, effectively removing one of his hands throughout the entire process? Did he carry it through the metal detector? He had enough time to stop and buy it but not stop and eat it at any point before finding his seat on the plane? BLARGH!! [/QUOTE] Well…not that I’m defending that horrible commercial or anything, but the very few times I’ve flown there have been fast-food joints beyond the metal detector, fairly close to the gates. So, Blizzard in one hand, carry-on bag in the other, it’s not outside the realm of possibility that he bought it right before the flight so he’d have something to eat on the plane. Of course, that was until Smarmy Guy had his way… (man, that guy pisses me off. He’s a good actor, because he seriously makes me, generally a fairly mellow person, want to punch him in the nose every time I see the commercial). ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/103 "2006-07-19T16:19:52Z")
Empire’s in Pittsburgh, as well, with a nice, folksy old man doing the voice work. I thought they were local, too. The ads that get me are radio ones for Mike’s Hard Lemonade with the bottle pulling phone pranks like calling a help line and asking for counseling. If your spiel is acting like a jerk, I’ll avoid your product. On the other hand, I doubt I’m their target market. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/104 "2006-07-19T17:51:46Z")
Oliver Jewellers. For years this guy has been doing lame “we buy your old gold!” ads on radio and TV in the Toronto area. Then, when ads moved in to cinemas, he started showing up in ten-metre-high glory before each movie… and we had paid to be there. At the same time, he was doing a particularly pathetic act as a superhero called CashMan or something. His super-suit was _wrinkled_, and we got to see that in excruciating detial. At least it had a cape. I haven’t seen these particular ads for a while; maybe CashMan got sucked into a vortex. ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/105 "2006-07-19T19:43:58Z")
[QUOTE=winterhawk11] Well…not that I’m defending that horrible commercial or anything, but the very few times I’ve flown there have been fast-food joints beyond the metal detector, fairly close to the gates. So, Blizzard in one hand, carry-on bag in the other, it’s not outside the realm of possibility that he bought it right before the flight so he’d have something to eat on the plane. [/QUOTE] Yes, but…Dairy Queen? I’ve never seen a Dairy Queen in an airport, and I’ve been to a few dozen airports in my life. Does anyone know of an airport with a Dairy Queen? ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/106 "2006-07-19T19:57:30Z")
Mpls/St. Paul (DQ’s home city, you’d expect it there). Probably others. ---
**Author:** ![Dante](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dante/32/9673_2.png) [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/107 "2006-07-19T20:09:05Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] At least it had a cape. I haven’t seen these particular ads for a while; maybe CashMan got sucked into a vortex. [/QUOTE] I wish. I saw an ad for him about a week ago. I saw him on the street once. He’s a tiny little man. You wouldn’t think you could pack that much irritating into such a small package. ---
**Author:** ![MagicXylophone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@MagicXylophone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MagicXylophone)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/108 "2006-07-19T21:28:05Z")
Denver Metro Area: Dealin’ Doug and Rocky’s Autos. Anyone who has ever watched television on the Front Range knows exactly what I’m talking about. On a sidenote, I think those old Quizno’s commercials with the bizarre singing were some of the most hilarious things I can remember. I still laugh when I think about them. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2006, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/109 "2006-07-20T00:40:45Z")
If I see another lame ass commercial for electronics (usually laptops) showing whatever they’re watching or listening to come to life, either in their lap or livingroom, I’m going to destroy something beautiful. OKAY. We get it. Your cheap ass Dells or HPs or whatevers are so amazing, it’s like Frodo or the Black Eyed Peas is right there with you. LAME. The first 18 or 19 products that used this oh-so-cleaver concept simply annoyed me… but now, you can’t see a fricking laptop or cellphone commercial that rips it off. It’s sooo tired. Now I hate. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2006, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/110 "2006-07-20T01:01:16Z")
[QUOTE=MagicXylophone] On a sidenote, I think those old Quizno’s commercials with the bizarre singing were some of the most hilarious things I can remember. I still laugh when I think about them. [/QUOTE] I used to work a helpdesk in the student union bookstore at my university. There was a very large wall of TVs in the middle of the room tuned to a news channel, and every so often the Spongmonkey Quizno’s commercials would come on. I derived great enjoyment watching random people in the store stop and _stare_ at the TV in horrified bewilderment. I also like the plastic-face Burger King. Go figure. (Staying on-topic: I have hated every jewelry commercial, TV and radio, I’ve ever had the misfortune to listen to. It’s not like I have the means or the interest in shopping at those stores in the first place, but if I did I’d boycott them.) ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2006, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/111 "2006-07-20T07:15:08Z")
> [@Grelby](#): > > I think that the atrociously sexist Subway Dinner Theater commercials (ever notice that’s always the wife/mother who is panicking over her Need to Provide to the husband and kids?) KFC’s commercial pisses me off for the same reason. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2006, 8:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/112 "2006-07-20T08:21:45Z")
One word: “Fanta.” I want to go Knights in Pskov on that company’s headquarters. ---
**Author:** ![Hail\_Ants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/dc4da7/32.png) [@Hail\_Ants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hail_Ants)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2006, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/113 "2006-07-20T08:39:06Z")
Not a product exactly, but those f_cking **[thetruth.com](http://thetruth.com) anti-smoking ads** are so f_cking pretentious, self-important, condescending, and obnoxious that they literally make me _ **want to take up smoking!** _ Oh gee, thank you Gen-Y slacker skateboarding douchebags. Before you came along I had no idea smoking was bad for you! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2006, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/114 "2006-07-20T14:26:16Z")
[QUOTE=fetus] KFC’s commercial pisses me off for the same reason. [/QUOTE] You just reminded me of another commercial I hate–and, coincidentally, another one that got played into the ground so I could hate it many times. Four words: “You’re such a side-hog.” Put that kid (the boy, not the girl who has every right to complain) next to Smarmy Guy from the Dairy Queen commercial and let me take ‘em both out with one nice swing of a bad-commercial-character-smitin’ baseball bat. ---
**Author:** ![Hippy\_Hollow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hippy_hollow/32/4841_2.png) [@Hippy\_Hollow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hippy_Hollow)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2006, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/115 "2006-07-20T20:30:01Z")
Can’t believe I’m asking for this, but apparently the marketing whizzes behind HEAD-ON! APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD! have two other ads, one for hemerrhoids and arthritis. Anyone know where I can find these online? They’re so spectacularly bad, there has to be some rationale for this tactic. They certainly have captured the nation’s imagination. ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2006, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/116 "2006-07-20T22:05:58Z")
[QUOTE=Hippy Hollow] Can’t believe I’m asking for this, but apparently the marketing whizzes behind HEAD-ON! APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD! have two other ads, one for hemerrhoids and arthritis. Anyone know where I can find these online? They’re so spectacularly bad, there has to be some rationale for this tactic. They certainly have captured the nation’s imagination. [/QUOTE] I think the rationale is the company marketing whizzes were too cheap to hire ad agency and just did the commercials themselves. Most of them consist of just a picture (often just a still of the product) and an announcer saying the name of the product and giving a brief one sentence description of what it is (“Freedom from hemmorhoids? Freedhem hemmorhoid cream.”) or how it’s used (“APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD!”). This is then rapidly repeated three times. These have to be the most bare-bones minimalist TV commercials I’ve seen broadcast anywhere (including late night local TV). ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/117 "2006-07-25T04:03:28Z")
Just a quick note before this thread fades away. Judging from this review of the “Head-On” commercial in the most recent [Slate’s Ad Report Card](http://www.slate.com/id/2146382/), my hunch about it was correct. > [@](#): > > This ad was made in-house by HeadOn, and it boasts production values so bad they may seem intentional. Oddly enough, they end up giving the ad an A+. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/118 "2006-07-25T04:10:08Z")
[QUOTE=Ranchoth] I want to go Knights in Pskov on that company’s headquarters. [/QUOTE] Ok, no prob. They’re somewhere in Atlanta…co-co-cola or something like that. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/119 "2006-07-25T04:17:22Z")
[QUOTE=myself] They’re somewhere in Atlanta…co-co-cola or something like that. [/QUOTE] No sooner than I post a joke about feigning ignorance about the name of Fanta’s manufacturer\* than I read this funny line from the _Slate_ review: > [@Seth Stevenson](#): > > The repetition method serves no purpose for a well-established brand (“Coca-Cola: Pour it down your esophagus. Coca-Cola: Pour it down your esophagus”) I’d find that pretty funny. But then, again, I think the HeadOn ads are funny. \*Fanta is a Nazi drink! Sort of. After World War II broke out, Americans only shipped necessities abroad, and trade with Nazi Germany thinned. The German branch of Coca-Cola had to [invent a replacement](http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/fanta.asp) that could be made in Germany using German ingredients. That drink was Fanta. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340/120 "2006-07-25T07:19:26Z")
> [@NDP](#): > > Oddly enough, they end up giving the ad an A+. Of course they do. It’s brilliant. Everyone here is talking about it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-actually-make-me-want-to-boycott-the-product/364340.md?page=7)