# Commercials that fail **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 15, 2009, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562 "2009-03-15T23:00:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/61 "2009-03-17T14:10:11Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > For all the people in this thread who insist that such tactics don’t work on them, well, that’s why they call it the unconscious mind. You wouldn’t know if it did. What Raza said. I have quite a lengthy boycott list I’ve made of companies whose brands I won’t buy because of their idiotic ads. ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/62 "2009-03-17T14:55:56Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > **As Robby has correctly pointed out, if you remember the ad, it’s not a failure. That’s the entire point.** > > **No one really remembers the details of an ad several months later. But they can remember the name of the product. If you can cite the product, then the ad works.** > > Now, if you want failure, there was back about 20 years ago a laxative commercial (Dulcolax Stool Softener,l I believe). The laxative came in a brown capsule. Brown. Long and cylindrical. > > Then, someone took one of these brown capsules and cut into it. A dark brown liquid _oozed_ out of it. > > Form follows function, I guess, but here was a commercial guaranteed to make any viewer think, “I’m not putting _that_ into my mouth.” And that feeling of disgust will linger for anyone who hears the name of the product. I note that Dulcolax doesn’t have any pictures of their pills on their website and it looks like they are no longer brown. And yet you remember and can cite both the product AND the ad details some 20 years later–by the above-bolded standard, this ad should therefore not be considered a failure. ---
**Author:** ![SpasticKitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@SpasticKitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpasticKitty)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/63 "2009-03-17T15:17:26Z")
> [@cwthree](#): > > With its recent ads featuring people chanting in monosyllabic monotone while walking through a surreal, game-like landscape, Comcast has pretty much guaranteed that our household will never use that service, even if it means giving up TV and communicating by smoke signals and postcards. > > ETA: Can someone explain these ads to me, anyway? I’m not a complete cultural illiterate, but I don’t get about 100% of the references in there. Those commercials need to just die. When somebody mentioned the reference to _Juno_ upthread, I was reminded of everything I hated about that movie and its stupid hipster music. Whatever the reference happens to be, it’s not cute or clever. It’s creepy and annoying. And the commercial goes on for-freaking-ever. I haven’t watched it the whole way through since the first time I had the misfortune of seeing it, but I remember thinking, “OMG when will this _end_?” We use Dish Network for TV and Comcast for internet. We don’t have much of a choice since we don’t have a landline at our house and are therefore limited to companies who provide cable internet. So, I guess Comcast wins. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/64 "2009-03-17T15:26:14Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > Can I indulge in a moment of superiority over all y’all? Of course you may. Why should today be different? > [@](#): > > Besides, NO ONE here is suggesting that movie previews are in ANY way in the same class as the horrific commercials being bemoaned in this thread. I’ll go past suggestion and actually claim that. The trailers for the forthcoming Julia Roberts/Clive Owen movie “Duplicity” prompted me to make a note of the title to make sure I don’t get roped into going to see it. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/65 "2009-03-17T16:13:56Z")
I’ll tell you two that fail for me, because they feature physical grotesqueries I can’t stand. The absolute worst, that sent me scrambling for the remote, was for Sears H&R Block and how they will take a second look at your tax return. But it featured this guy with one huge eye in his forehead, instead of two eyes. I’m ok with Cyclopses with a regular size eye, but this was one HUGE eye. I couldn’t stand it and swore a mighty oath never to use their services, and maybe not to go to Sears at all. The second is the one for the lottery, with the guy who is a little bit of luck. But instead of a proportionally shrunken person, it’s a shrunken body with a big head. Not as bad as Sears, but horrible too. Oh, and the xBox 360 with the hideous hollowed-out human heads. barf ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/66 "2009-03-17T16:18:20Z")
The repulsive ad featuring the redhead hippy chick on a bicycle with 3 foot long underarm hair. I don’t remember what they are selling, but whatever it is, I aint buyin’. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/67 "2009-03-17T20:10:44Z")
> [@Justin\_Bailey](#): > > But again, clever alone doesn’t get people to buy (especially since Comcast doesn’t even operate anywhere near where I live) and the ads are basically failures. Speaking of, the ultimate in failed ads (my opinion anyway) was when Sonic would advertise in the Chicago area despite there not being a Sonic within 150 miles of my house. I checked online. This went on for years. They have one in Aurora, IL now but I’m not driving clear out there for a burger. Especially not since they changed commercial casts from dopey guy/sarcastic wife to annoying kid/annoying mom. Also, forget Denny’s. I wanna eat at whichever restaurant it is that has [Nannerpuss](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G64L6X_yuXU&feature=related)! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/68 "2009-03-17T20:11:47Z")
[QUOTE=lissener] Well, yes and no. I think they’ve given up on actually selling anything to a conscious human brain, and instead are focusing on simply trying to make something, anything, stick to the reptile brain, or whatever they’re calling it nowadays. For all the people in this thread who insist that such tactics don’t work on them, well, that’s why they call it the unconscious mind. You wouldn’t know if it did. [/QUOTE] That only works if the unconscious association is a positive one. If the person takes away a negative association from the commercial, then whenever they think of the product they are going to have a negative reaction, and be less likely to purchase it, even if they can’t remember why. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/69 "2009-03-17T21:07:07Z")
I’m not sure if it’s still running but a couple months ago I was seeing a series of commercials for Microsoft which showed a succession of really grainy, web-cammy clips which seemed to feature only the super-dorkiest Microsoft users claiming “I can do blah blah blah- I’m a PC”. OK, uber-geeks and their low-quality web cam videos… are supposed to be selling me on the idea of buying a Microsoft product. I don’t think you’re really sending the message you think you are. Yes, I remember it, but all those commercials did was reinforce in my mind my aversion to all things Microsoft. ---
**Author:** ![Fionn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Fionn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fionn)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/70 "2009-03-17T23:38:23Z")
> [@corkboard](#): > > I’m not sure if it’s still running but a couple months ago I was seeing a series of commercials for Microsoft which showed a succession of really grainy, web-cammy clips which seemed to feature only the super-dorkiest Microsoft users claiming “I can do blah blah blah- I’m a PC”. One of them was “I’m a PC, and I eat pancakes.” WTF? Horrible ad. ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/71 "2009-03-18T00:10:07Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > The second is the one for the lottery, with the guy who is a little bit of luck. But instead of a proportionally shrunken person, it’s a shrunken body with a big head. Not as bad as Sears, but horrible too. While advertising the lottery (beyond telling people how much the jackpot is, because that’s what really drives sales) has to be the stupidiest thing ever, my wife and I hate these commercials because we think the little bit of luck guy looks like a sexual predator. The guy’s real head on his real body probably looks like a sexual predator too. > [@Jophiel](#): > > Speaking of, the ultimate in failed ads (my opinion anyway) was when Sonic would advertise in the Chicago area despite there not being a Sonic within 150 miles of my house. I checked online. This went on for years. Yes! They did the same thing in upstate/western New York. The nearest Sonic at the time was about 100 miles away (I checked online too) and now the nearest one is 200 miles away. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/72 "2009-03-18T04:19:26Z")
How about commercials that tell you what they are advertising, but you’re not sure why they’re advertising it. Like, “Radio is heard here. Radio is heard everywhere.” What is Radio advertising (on radio, of course)? Is this to counter HD radio? If so, it would be nice if they’d tell is that, because I’m likely to associate HD radio as radio, but maybe better. Or are they trying to counter TV, Internet, etc? But the ads are on radio, so it’s not like they’re reaching out to a new audience. What am I missing? ---
**Author:** ![MOIDALIZE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@MOIDALIZE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MOIDALIZE)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/73 "2009-03-18T04:35:07Z")
The Microsoft commercials that are fake telephone interviews, where some guy is talking with a CEO. I guess the overall message is the importance of technology in business (stunning insight!), and the one commercial has a conversation with the head of Pacific Sunware or something. He’s asked “What does an economic tsunami mean to a surfing CEO?” and the CEO goes through some droll, meaningless response about using technology to “stay ahead of the wolfpack” while they show animations representing what he’s saying. At one point, the other guy says “Uh huh,” which they also represent by showing an animation that says “Uh huh.” Everything about this commercial bugs the shit out of me. Besides not really indicating what Microsoft product is being advertised, it has this whole attitude of “I am a vital cog in the economy and the things I say have great importance for everyone listening, and the weight of the world rests firmly on my shoulders.” Computer/business people: you’re not heroes. Get over yourselves. You goddamn nerds aren’t going to bring us into some golden age of technological bliss. ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/74 "2009-03-18T13:56:42Z")
> [@Irishman](#): > > The commercial with the talking baby advertising some sort of etrading thingy. I **HATE!!!** that commercial. Okay, so it’s bad enough it is a talking baby, then they’re doing the whole “baby is really adult” thingy, but then he gets a phone call from a girl and is talking about hooking up. The baby wants a booty call. There’s strong sexual innuendo in the ad, and all I can do is think how creepy it is for someone to be thinking about a baby as a sexual being. Ewwww. And don’t forget the ad that shows the same kid SPITTING UP. Why would we want to see that in an ad??? ---
**Author:** ![shy\_guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a6a055/32.png) [@shy\_guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shy_guy)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/75 "2009-03-18T14:23:02Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Speaking of, the ultimate in failed ads (my opinion anyway) was when Sonic would advertise in the Chicago area despite there not being a Sonic within 150 miles of my house. I checked online. This went on for years. I really like Sonic commercials, but yeah. I have _never seen a Sonic in my life_. Great commercials, but the restaurant may as well be mythical for all I know. Also, I think people generally remember that the “wassssuuup” ad was for Budweiser. Back in the day when it was an internet meme, it was always “Cookie Monster/Thundercats/whoever does the Bud commercial.” The second line of the thing is, “Watchin’ the game, havin’ a Bud,” after all. I _think_ the commercial with the redhead with the three-foot-long armpit hair is for Axe deodorant. I’m not 100% sure because the commercial makes me recoil in horror, and I’d never buy Axe anyway. There was a similar bad one a few months ago where they were advertising some kind of body spray that smelled like chocolate (wtf?) and this guy turned into a big chocolate version of himself and sexy women ate him as he went about his day. Really creepy and gross. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/76 "2009-03-18T14:25:26Z")
> [@MOIDALIZE](#): > > Everything about this commercial bugs the shit out of me. Besides not really indicating what Microsoft product is being advertised, it has this whole attitude of “I am a vital cog in the economy and the things I say have great importance for everyone listening, and the weight of the world rests firmly on my shoulders.” Computer/business people: you’re not heroes. Get over yourselves. You goddamn nerds aren’t going to bring us into some golden age of technological bliss. That reminds me of the insufferable “Ask Chuck” Charles Schwab animated “real people”. “Some people are just lying there and taking it. That’s not me.” Well, fucker, if you have so much power over the market, bully for you. :rolleyes: > [@Irishman](#): > > How about commercials that tell you what they are advertising, but you’re not sure why they’re advertising it. Like, “Radio is heard here. Radio is heard everywhere.” > > What is Radio advertising (on radio, of course)? Is this to counter HD radio? If so, it would be nice if they’d tell is that, because I’m likely to associate HD radio as radio, but maybe better. Or are they trying to counter TV, Internet, etc? But the ads are on radio, so it’s not like they’re reaching out to a new audience. What am I missing? And the really sad ones in the face of the digital switchover: “Remember when you family would gather around two channels? Come back to local TV. We’ve been here the whole time.” ---
**Author:** ![PerditaX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/65b543/32.png) [@PerditaX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PerditaX)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/77 "2009-03-18T14:38:01Z")
My brother is in advertising, and he contends that the “best” commercials are the ones for AFLAC insurance, because 1) they’re funny and watchable; 2) you remember the name of the product ; 3) you remember what the product does. ---
**Author:** ![shy\_guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a6a055/32.png) [@shy\_guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shy_guy)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/78 "2009-03-18T15:10:26Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > That reminds me of the insufferable “Ask Chuck” Charles Schwab animated “real people”. “Some people are just lying there and taking it. That’s not me.” Well, fucker, if you have so much power over the market, bully for you. :rolleyes: Those commercials make me squirm. I always wonder if they’d be as, like you say, insufferable if they ditched the weird creepy animation technique, but I’m not sure. ---
**Author:** ![SpasticKitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@SpasticKitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpasticKitty)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/79 "2009-03-18T15:13:50Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Also, forget Denny’s. I wanna eat at whichever restaurant it is that has [Nannerpuss](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G64L6X_yuXU&feature=related)! 😛 I LOVE Nannerpuss! Hands down, one of my favorite Super Bowl commercials of all time. You still couldn’t pay me to eat at Denny’s, though. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562/80 "2009-03-18T15:28:02Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Speaking of, the ultimate in failed ads (my opinion anyway) was when Sonic would advertise in the Chicago area despite there not being a Sonic within 150 miles of my house. Well, except that that’s not exactly what they’re doing. Sonic has traditionally been in the southern half of the U.S., where the weather’s warm enough for enough of the year to make a drive-in work (Sonic restaurants don’t have inside service). Only now are they starting to expand into “cold-weather” markets like Chicago. But, they’ve been in enough of the U.S. for the past few years that it’s more cost-effective for them to buy advertising on national networks (albeit mostly, if not entirely, cable networks, rather than the big broadcast networks), rather than buying ad time only in those markets where they actually operate. If they were specifically buying ad time in Chicago for years, despite not having restaurants here, _then_ I’d say it was a failed idea. I also suspect that they’ve been using the fact that they’ve been running ads in markets that they don’t operate in to build awareness / interest in the brand for when they _do_ move into those markets. They recently opened a restaurant in Bartlett (far W/NW Chicago suburb), and that place is _jammed_. I strongly suspect that it wouldn’t be nearly so busy if the locals hadn’t seen years of Sonic ads. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-fail/489562.md?page=5)