# Commercials that lie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 5, 2009, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457 "2009-08-05T19:28:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/21 "2009-08-06T07:59:17Z")
I saw this one commercial that made it look like LeBron James worked at ESPN. I don’t think that’s true at all. ---
**Author:** ![Shamozzle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shamozzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shamozzle)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 9:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/22 "2009-08-06T09:18:44Z")
> [@TV\_time](#): > > OK, maybe not lie but sure give the wrong impression. > > I was watching television the other day and a commercial came on for a battery. It was saying how good the batteries were because emergency medical types out of Denver that worked the tornado in Holly, Colorado use only their brand of battery. OK, that may well be true but the pictures and sound provided to illustrate the point were just so bogus. > > Look on a map. Holly, Colorado is about 35 miles from Kansas. And trust me I know the town. There are no pine forests, no mountains, no cliffs as the commercial suggests. It is like Kansas. Also the commercial suggest that the choppers were storm tossed as they came into Holly. I was there. They weren’t storm tossed. The people appreciated their appearance, but they were not in the middle of a storm when they arrived. It had long since passed on. > > They may be wonderful batteries, but that commercial is really giving a questionable impression. I remember this commercial and when I saw it I was immediately struck by how much the setting resembled the coast of British Columbia near where I live. I remember thinking, ‘I’ve never been to Colorado but I’m pretty sure there aren’t any ocean inlets.’, as seemingly portrayed in the commercial. ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/23 "2009-08-06T15:27:39Z")
> [@Markxxx](#): > > What I like about the batteries (as well as aspirin and other pain relievers) is they say “No battery (or medicine) is MORE effective than our brand.” > > Did you notice that? They never said the other brands weren’t JUST AS EFFECTIVE and probably cheaper. They just said they’re not MORE effective. My favorite example of this sort of thing: Every once in awhile you’ll hear a narrator say something like the following of a product: “Anything less is not enough!” Think about it. That means that they are admitting that their product’s quality is just barely at the absolute minimum level of acceptability. ---
**Author:** ![UltraVires](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecccb3/32.png) [@UltraVires](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UltraVires)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/24 "2009-08-06T15:35:45Z")
> [@SenorBeef](#): > > Speaking of insurance, there’s the Geico “in 15 minutes you could save up to 15% or more” which, upon examination, is a completely useless statement. Right…they could say that in 15 minutes you will DEFINITELY save up to 15% or more! Anywhere from -infinity% to +infinity% would fall under this statement. It is only slightly more misleading than the other ads.. ---
**Author:** ![Shamozzle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shamozzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shamozzle)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/25 "2009-08-06T15:36:16Z")
The angle that really bugs me is this: “Gets teeth five shades whiter” “Removes the appearance of fine lines by 34%” “Your hair will be 55% more full.” According to who? These things are immeasurable in the objective sense and so obviously they’ve pulled a number out of their collective asses that seems large enough to make an impact and yet small enough to remain believable. And what about “four out of five dentists recommend…” So, what, 20% of the dentists out there don’t think we should use your product? ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/26 "2009-08-06T15:49:09Z")
> [@Markxxx](#): > > What I like about the batteries (as well as aspirin and other pain relievers) is they say “No battery (or medicine) is MORE effective than our brand.” > > Did you notice that? They never said the other brands weren’t JUST AS EFFECTIVE and probably cheaper. They just said they’re not MORE effective. That’s because of FTC regulations. If you say, “nothing is better,” it means you’re saying “all brands are equal.” That’s allowed. However, if you say, “we’re better,” you need to provide evidence to back your claim or the ad will be removed. The word “virtually” used to be used a lot to cheat. “Virtually spot-free dishes” for a dishwashing detergent doesn’t mean the same as “spot-free dishes.” ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/27 "2009-08-06T15:55:29Z")
During the AMC broadcast of “Ghostbusters” on Sunday night, they ran ads for [ExtenZe pills](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ExtenZe) several times. Besides the fact that the company behind this crap has already been successfully sued for false advertising, this ad featured the line “We’ve sold almost a billion pills - would we be this successful if they didn’t work?” (or something to that effect) Why, yes - yes you would. Asking me to trust your product because you’ve found a lot of other suckers is not for me, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/28 "2009-08-06T16:03:30Z")
> [@Shamozzle](#): > > And what about “four out of five dentists recommend…” So, what, 20% of the dentists out there don’t think we should use your product? Well, that one is kinda true. The statement, as I recall it, is “Four out of five dentists recommend sugarless gum for their patients who chew gum.” In point of fact, the fifth dentist just recommends that their patients who chew gum _stop chewing gum_. ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/29 "2009-08-06T16:05:42Z")
> [@Shamozzle](#): > > And what about “four out of five dentists recommend…” So, what, 20% of the dentists out there don’t think we should use your product? Cecil covered that one … it was for Trident sugarless gum, I think. And yes, the fifth dentist (or the 20th percentile) basically told their patients “Don’t chew gum, period. I don’t care what kind it is.” ---
**Author:** ![FalconFinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@FalconFinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FalconFinder)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/30 "2009-08-06T18:20:17Z")
While the [freecreditreport.com](http://freecreditreport.com) commercials lie terribly, I have to admit I like their little jingles. I find them amusing and creative. Too bad it’s a product totally not worth having. Everyone can get one free view of their credit report from all three companies once a year. ---
**Author:** ![Arglefraster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@Arglefraster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arglefraster)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/31 "2009-08-06T20:04:45Z")
There’s a commercial on the radio for some kind of fake cigarette to help you stop smoking. They say things like: “We can’t tell you it’s safe, but you do the math! It’s just water vapor!” “We can’t tell you it will help you quit smoking, but thousands of people quit smoking every day!” That last one is particularly sneaky. They don’t say thousands of people quit smoking _using their product_. They just say that thousands quit smoking. ---
**Author:** ![Easy\_Easter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8c91f0/32.png) [@Easy\_Easter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Easy_Easter)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/32 "2009-08-06T20:31:00Z")
Anything with Billy Mayes at this point. I guess I find a dead guy hawking product a little creepy and not too trustworthy. ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/33 "2009-08-06T20:35:07Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > It can be assumed that, if you want to be on the Internet, you’re smart enough to have already done step one, as well as step three (turn the freaking computer on). So the steps could have just been step 2 (rephrased as “Plug in the phone wire.”), and the actual step 2 could be “Start Safari.” Oh, no. It was waaaay worse than that. This was pre-Safari, BTW - your only option was FireFox 3.0.2. [sub]Because I know someone will bring it up, yes, you could have used Camino, but for brevity’s sake I won’t even go there[/sub] Anyhoo, back when I used to configure them, when that commercial came out, it would’ve been like this: Step 1: Plug in Step 2: “Get connected” Step 3: Applications -\> Utilities -\> Directory Access Step 4: Click on the checkbox next to “Appletalk” Step 5: Click the Lock icon Step 6: Enter your Admin password Step 7: Apply Step 8: Reboot Step 9: Goto System Preferences | Network Step 10: Click on “Built-in Ethernet” Step 11: Click on “Configure IPv4” tab Step 12: Click to enable “Using DHCP” Step 13: Click to **disable** “PPoE” Step 14: Click on “Ethernet” tab Step 15: Set “Configure” to “Automatically” in the popup Step 16: Apply To All Step 17: Reboot Step 18: Launch FireFox Step 19: Oops - The only supported version of FireFox for this machine doesn’t support IPv6 routing, so your DNS lookups will be really slow. Step 20: Launch Firefox Step 21: Type in the address bar: about: config Step 22: In the filter, type: ipv6 Step 23: Find the variable “network.dns.disableIPv6” Step 24: Change the value to true. Step 25: Quit and restart FireFox Step 26: **There’s no Step 26!!!"** ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/34 "2009-08-06T20:46:36Z")
I love Hebrew National hot dogs, but their commercials that state that meat from the front, kosher half of the cow is better tasting than the meat from the back half are just bullshit. There are some fatty, gristly cuts that are perfectly kosher, and some delicious cuts that are not. Don’t claim that the meat that’s not OK for you to eat because Jacob lost an MMA match with an angel tastes bad as well. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2009, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/35 "2009-08-06T21:06:50Z")
> [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](#): > > Besides the fact that the company behind this crap has already been successfully sued for false advertising, this ad featured the line “We’ve sold almost a billion pills - would we be this successful if they didn’t work?” (or something to that effect) > > Why, yes - yes you would. Asking me to trust your product because you’ve found a lot of other suckers is not for me, thanks. Maybe they’ve changed it but it used to be even stupider: “Could we afford to give you a free two week supply if they didn’t work?” Wait… could you afford to give me 14 pills made of sawdust and ash if only one person in 100 was stupid enough to start paying for them?? Yes. Yes, you could. ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/36 "2009-08-07T00:41:56Z")
> [@Easy\_Easter](#): > > Anything with Billy Mayes at this point. I guess I find a dead guy hawking product a little creepy and not too trustworthy. Didn’t the same thing happen with Michael Landon? Seems like he was on TV selling something long after he was dead? > [@FalconFinder](#): > > While the [freecreditreport.com](http://freecreditreport.com) commercials lie terribly, I have to admit I like their little jingles. I find them amusing and creative. The Free Credit Report Dot Com Guy is [Eric Violette](http://www.ericviolette.com/). He is from Quebec and doesn’t sing the commericals, even though he has his own band. Evidently his English isn’t the best so he lip syncs which, I’ll admit now that I know he does it, it’s very obvious he’s doing not singing ---
**Author:** ![emcee2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7bcc69/32.png) [@emcee2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emcee2k)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/37 "2009-08-07T01:11:12Z")
> [@Morbo](#): > > Oh, no. It was waaaay worse than that. This was pre-Safari, BTW - your only option was FireFox 3.0.2. [sub]Because I know someone will bring it up, yes, you could have used Camino, but for brevity’s sake I won’t even go there[/sub] > > Anyhoo, back when I used to configure them, when that commercial came out, it would’ve been like this: > > Step 1: Plug in > Step 2: “Get connected” > > Step 3: Applications -\> Utilities -\> Directory Access > Step 4: Click on the checkbox next to “Appletalk” > Step 5: Click the Lock icon > Step 6: Enter your Admin password > Step 7: Apply > Step 8: Reboot > Step 9: Goto System Preferences | Network > Step 10: Click on “Built-in Ethernet” > Step 11: Click on “Configure IPv4” tab > Step 12: Click to enable “Using DHCP” > Step 13: Click to **disable** “PPoE” > Step 14: Click on “Ethernet” tab > Step 15: Set “Configure” to “Automatically” in the popup > Step 16: Apply To All > Step 17: Reboot > Step 18: Launch FireFox > Step 19: Oops - The only supported version of FireFox for this machine doesn’t support IPv6 routing, so your DNS lookups will be really slow. > Step 20: Launch Firefox > Step 21: Type in the address bar: about: config > Step 22: In the filter, type: ipv6 > Step 23: Find the variable “network.dns.disableIPv6” > Step 24: Change the value to true. > Step 25: Quit and restart FireFox > > Step 26: **There’s no Step 26!!!"** There was no Firefox, either. That commercial is like circa 1998. ---
**Author:** ![Patch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a183cd/32.png) [@Patch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patch)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/38 "2009-08-07T01:19:23Z")
> [@FalconFinder](#): > > While the [freecreditreport.com](http://freecreditreport.com) commercials lie terribly, I have to admit I like their little jingles. I find them amusing and creative. Too bad it’s a product totally not worth having. Everyone can get one free view of their credit report from all three companies once a year. Wish I could. Experian refuses to mail me my credit report, saying I haven’t proved who I am. Every time I complain i get the same useless form letter back (I think it has something to do with a mailing address separate from my physical address). TransUnion and Equifax had no trouble sending me my reports, and nothing looks out of place on them. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/39 "2009-08-07T01:43:33Z")
I love hearing when an ad says _“our product meets or exceeds all government standards.”_ I guess marketing decided that sounded better than the equivalent claim of _“our product isn’t unsafe to the point of being illegal.”_ ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457/40 "2009-08-07T02:04:21Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Maybe they’ve changed it but it used to be even stupider: “Could we afford to give you a free two week supply if they didn’t work?” > > Wait… could you afford to give me 14 pills made of sawdust and ash if only one person in 100 was stupid enough to start paying for them?? Yes. Yes, you could. During “The Dark Week” when I was going through sales training at a local telesales company (which I thankfully resigned from before my soul died), they detailed how the promotion for FlaccidstenZe worked… the sucker…err…customer would call in for their “free trial period\*” and you were to get the customer’s credit card number and shipping address, explain to them that what they were getting was 14 days to _try_ the product out, and after that fourteen days their credit card WOULD AUTOMATICALLY BE BILLED for the price of the product, and would be billed every month for another shipment, as they were signing up for a “maintenance plan” you were supposed to infer (without actually saying it directly) that their manhood would shrivel up/dry up/fall off/etc… if they stopped taking the pills and it was in their best interest to keep on the program, basically, you bully the customer into ponying up their CC#, and scare them into continuing to use the product, if the customer wanted to cancel after the “free trial period” customer service drones were instructed to make it as difficult/frustrating as possible to cancel, in the hopes the customer would simply give up and continue getting worthless shipments of a pill that’s main active ingredient (other than sawdust and lies) was merely Korean Red Ginseng I hated the enhancement products ever since they were invented, mainly due to being inundated with spammers hawking that useless “whale/snake oil” crap, and there was no way in Hell I’d be caught dead forcing that crap on unsuspecting consumers (“idiots”) - note the term Free TRIAL PERIOD, nowhere in the promotion does it say the product is free, just that they can TRY it for a time period, it’s just plain dishonest marketing [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/commercials-that-lie/505457.md?page=3)