# Conception and Humanity: A Modest Proposal **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 24, 2006, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967 "2006-02-24T19:53:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2006, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/61 "2006-02-25T05:25:58Z")
> [@Scylla](#): > > Do you feel that your opinions are based on balderdash, poopycock, strawmen and false assertions? You forgot tommyrot. ---
**Author:** ![Mince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@Mince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mince)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2006, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/62 "2006-02-25T06:00:29Z")
It seems your name is a paradox. Tiny: Wanye! How you doin’? Wayne Campbell: Hey Tiny, who’s playing today? Tiny: Jolly Green Giants and the Shitty Beatles. Wayne Campbell: Shitty Beatles? Are they any good? Tiny: They suck! Wayne Campbell: Then it’s not just a clever name ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2006, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/63 "2006-02-25T06:11:57Z")
> [@yBeayf](#): > > The text here says not to hire a whore for use in the temple; it says nothing about which orifice is being used. Well, most women of my acquaintance (none of them whores, to the best of my knowledge) don’t actually have an orifice in their temple. Although there is the whole “squicking” thing that can overcome _that_ difficulty. > [@](#): > > Vaginal intercourse with a fertile whore in the temple could very likely result in conception, yet is nevertheless an abomination. A _whore_ with a _vagina_ in her _temple_…so there _IS_ squicking going on, is that what you’re saying? Sounds kind of, well, I won’t say _abominable_, but the idea does leave me feeling sort of, squicked out, if you will. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2006, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/64 "2006-02-25T07:03:06Z")
> [@Jpeg Jones](#): > > So, it was wrong of me to be touching my cat’s butthole while reading this? I can’t let this go by without notifying you that I laughed loud and long at this. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2006, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/65 "2006-02-25T19:21:07Z")
> [@Scylla](#): > > No you don’t. Gravity brings you down… No, baby, _you_ bring me down. Gravity just keeps me from floating away. > [@](#): > > …“Nothing?” > > The word you were looking for was “anything…” Wrong again! If that were so, then the line would mean _everything_ is to be feared. _Tres duh, mon petit._. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2006, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/66 "2006-02-25T22:52:44Z")
> [@Scylla](#): > > …an ass is a beast who’s germ plasm is incompatible with humanity’s… So if you’d like to swing on a star… ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2006, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/67 "2006-02-25T23:00:02Z")
…carry moonbeams home in a jar ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2006, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/68 "2006-02-26T14:32:56Z")
…and be better off than you are ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2006, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/69 "2006-02-26T19:21:50Z")
> [@Mtgman](#): > > Humor Writing Workshops > Work with a humor writing pro in acclaimed online workshops [www.writingclasses.com](http://www.writingclasses.com) > Ads by Google > > Enjoy, > Steven Interesting. How much will they pay me, do you think? ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2006, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/70 "2006-02-26T20:17:54Z")
> [@Zoe](#): > > I like Emerson, but he didn’t really probe the depths of what women – strong, older women – are capable of giving in times of need. Wouldn’t mind probing those depths…🙂 ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2006, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/71 "2006-02-26T21:21:16Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > Wouldn’t mind probing those depths…🙂 [Ben Franklin would approve.](http://www.rjgeib.com/thoughts/franklin/franklin.html) ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2006, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/72 "2006-02-26T23:57:17Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Interesting. How much will they pay me, do you think? I would suggest not quitting your day job. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967/73 "2006-02-28T20:50:29Z")
> [@John Mace](#): > > I would suggest not quitting your day job. 😉 Lacks originality, but graced by brevity. That’ll be two dollars. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conception-and-humanity-a-modest-proposal/345967.md?page=3)