<< we now aren’t sure what the post-translation words “calvarie” and “koppen” mean. >>
The calvarie are the guys on horses who come charging over the hill to thwart the Indian attack, usually led by John Wayne or Henry Fonday or Randolph Scott.
“Koppen” is obviously German for “cops”, and in “cheezit, the”
This is only my 2nd posting; I don’t know if I should just reference [ http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=2816113#post2816113 ] the short thread I 1st responded to, or quote myself here.
Briefly: just back from Hameln, Westfalen, Deutschland, I saw the stones mentioned above which are dated 1531 & 1536. The museum they are in [I believe - my German is NOT that good] mentions much of the above, too. There, the “story” was named “Ratfanger von Hameln”, The Ratcatcher of Hamelin. The illustration from 1610 certainly looked blotched, patched, maybe “parti-colored” to me. They show translations into more than 60 languages.
Just wanted to jump in with a big Welcome to fellow Bay Area Doper Shawnbbrad. 
And from the sounds of it, we were at Cal around the same time.
AG (class of '93)