# Concert courtesy **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 26, 2015, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233 "2015-07-26T14:52:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/21 "2015-07-26T19:58:39Z")
> [@moejoe](#): > > I worked as an usher at concert venues for many years and it’s usually a mob rules policy. So if you’re the only ones up and dancing in your section we’re going to tell you to sit down, but if everyone is up and dancing except for a few seated patrons they will be told to deal with it. That’s the typical etiquette. If I am at a rare (for me) concert where most of the people around me are sitting, I will remain seated. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/22 "2015-07-26T20:05:54Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > I assure you that the performers very much prefer people to be up and dancing. Yeah well, they didn’t pay between $40 and $110 to either stand for a couple hours or stare at someone else’s ass. If they want people to be standing then play in standing-style venues instead of places making me pay for a seat but I’m not allowed to use it. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/23 "2015-07-26T20:06:27Z")
Up in back! I’m short so I can barely see unless I’m standing and I do have a very hard time sitting at a concert anyway. I’ve been known to leave my seat for a standing spot against a wall if I felt I would bother anyone behind me. Concerts are meant for dancing! ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/24 "2015-07-26T20:46:41Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Yeah well, they didn’t pay between $40 and $110 to either stand for a couple hours or stare at someone else’s ass. If they want people to be standing then play in standing-style venues instead of places making me pay for a seat but I’m not allowed to use it. lol. Whatever dude. You truly don’t get it, but that’s ok you’re not alone. For starters, they can’t reconfigure venues for every possible act that will be there. For some genres, people sitting are going to be shit out of luck when 95% of the place is dancing and having fun in the way the show is intended to be enjoyed. I’d rather see musicians enjoying the crowd which will result in a much better show. Rock music is for dancing, not a bunch of uptight twits sipping wine coolers and sitting and not getting what is going on. But as I said, I will never be the only one standing in front of a bunch of seated people. That’s just rude. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/25 "2015-07-26T20:57:01Z")
Concert courtesy? An highly endangered concept…if it ever existed at all\*. A significant number of concertgoers these days treat the show as background music to chit-chatting with their seatmate or staring/poking at their smartphones. I’m usually content to sit, but I love to get up and bop around if conditions permit. If the person in front of me stands up, all bets are off. My strategy for acts that I really want to “see” is to get a seat in the first 10 rows or so where the stage fills my field of view and the sound is loud enough to drown out people who blab away through the performance. \*There are respectful and attentive audiences for certain performers, but they are the exception rather than the norm. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/26 "2015-07-26T21:25:52Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > lol. Whatever dude. You truly don’t get it, but that’s ok you’re not alone. Well, I was partially tongue-in-cheek but the point is valid that my concern isn’t for the musicians who are getting paid to be there versus the people who paid to see them. As I said though, people will always find reasons to justify rudeness be it saying “but I bet they want me to dance” or scoffing at “wine coolers” or whatever else makes them feel better. That’s okay, I roll with it knowing that people are just innately out for themselves and come up with the excuses after the fact and I don’t go to a show expecting any better from them. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/27 "2015-07-26T21:33:21Z")
I’ll also say that this isn’t something that I usually have to deal with too often. Usually acts we see these days have both seating and then standing areas nearer to the stage. The people who want to dance tend to move up front, those who want to sit can sit and usually see over the dancers/standers due to venue construction. But, yeah, “But I just know that they want you to stand” is a really lame excuse unless the band is actively on stage imploring people to stand and dance. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/28 "2015-07-26T21:39:16Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Well, I was partially tongue-in-cheek but the point is valid that my concern isn’t for the musicians who are getting paid to be there versus the people who paid to see them. > > As I said though, people will always find reasons to justify rudeness be it saying “but I bet they want me to dance” or scoffing at “wine coolers” or whatever else makes them feel better. That’s okay, I roll with it knowing that people are just innately out for themselves and come up with the excuses after the fact and I don’t go to a show expecting any better from them. For the third time, even though I want to dance, I don’t when most of the people behind me are sitting. For the second time, my opinion that they want us to dance is based on one on one conversations with actual performers. Your statement about the musicians getting paid versus people paying to see them shows that you fundamentally do not get it. The acts and the crowd are in it together in many genres for example jam bands and bluegrass. Different genres have different cultures. It’s definitely different if you’re going to see Styx or someone playing the same exact show of their greatest hits that they’ve been doing for years. I was here last night. Sit? Seriously? Thousands of people were there and pretty much no one was sitting. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/29 "2015-07-26T21:40:59Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > I was here last night. Sit? Seriously? Thousands of people were there and pretty much no one was sitting. Just curious where you were but there’s no link. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/30 "2015-07-26T21:45:04Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > Just curious where you were but there’s no link. Oops. I was on the floor up close for the first set and then up right around where this video was shot for the second set to sit with a friend who had seats up there and so I could enjoy the light show with her. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/31 "2015-07-26T21:55:06Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > Your statement about the musicians getting paid versus people paying to see them shows that you fundamentally do not get it. […] The acts and the crowd are in it together That’s… adorable. Someone is laughing all the way to the bank and it’s probably not you. They do have your money though 😃 ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2015, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/32 "2015-07-26T22:01:57Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > That’s… adorable. Someone is laughing all the way to the bank and it’s probably not you. They do have your money though 😃 And they deserve it. It doesn’t mean that they don’t enjoy their work and don’t do a better job for an appreciative crowd that gets it. I just counted. I have been to 70 concerts so far in 2015 from little clubs to very large venues. It’s a great hobby. I can go to a jam band show anywhere in the country and I will see people I know. It’s like my second family. I hope that you enjoy something in the way that I enjoy live music. If not, you are missing out. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2015, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/33 "2015-07-27T00:03:49Z")
Some (indoor) concert venues, at least here where I live, have people who want to dance/stand up/be close to the performance standing on the ground floor, plus a balcony with seats for those who want to sit while watching the performance. As for singing along, some of my favourite bands actively encourage the audience to sing along, and I go to their shows expecting that, so it doesn’t ruin it for me. Besides, the performers singing is usually louder than the audience. I don’t think I’ve been to a concert with the situation in the OP, where people have specific seats and some of those with the specific seats want to dance, and dance in their seating row. ---
**Author:** ![harmonicamoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@harmonicamoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmonicamoon)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2015, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/34 "2015-07-27T00:13:51Z")
Most of all my concerts were acoustic/bluegrass. There was always a place off to the side were people could dance, throw Frisbees, etc. They were family events. Everyone was happy. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2015, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/35 "2015-07-27T00:44:16Z")
I’ve been to a lot of outdoor concerts where I don’t remember there being seats at all, it’s usually just a big lawn so of course people are going to stand and dance and smoke drugs. That’s what a concert should be. Having seats just complicates the matter. ---
**Author:** ![Clark\_Cello](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@Clark\_Cello](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clark_Cello)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2015, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/36 "2015-07-27T02:18:17Z")
I haven’t been to a rock/pop concert (I assume that is what we are limiting ourselves to here?) for 20 years now, so take my comments for what they are worth. The idea that people would want and expect to go to a concert and just sit in their seats and watch seems very weird to me. Don’t get me wrong, that’s one of the reasons I haven’t been in 20 years; that sort of thing doesn’t appeal to me as much as it once did. But every concert I have ever been to (and I went to quite a few when I was younger) had people standing up, dancing, cheering, shouting, etc. That’s kind of the whole point of a rock concert; the crowd feeds off the energy of the band and vice-versa. To just sit in your seat and listen seems very un-rock and roll to me. But, as I said, it’s been a while. Maybe as the bands and their fans have aged, things have changed. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2015, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/37 "2015-07-27T04:02:25Z")
> [@Clark\_Cello](#): > > every concert I have ever been to (and I went to quite a few when I was younger) had people standing up, dancing, cheering, shouting, etc. That’s kind of the whole point of a rock concert; the crowd feeds off the energy of the band and vice-versa. That’s the reason I stopped going to concerts. I bought tickets to hear (and see) the musicians – not to hear some drunk jackoff yell “Woooo!” in my ear for two hours. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2015, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/38 "2015-07-27T04:31:14Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > That’s the reason I stopped going to concerts. I bought tickets to hear (and see) the musicians – not to hear some drunk jackoff yell “Woooo!” in my ear for two hours. We spent most of the weekend at The Pittsburgh Blues Festival. It’s an amphitheater in a park, with a grassy slope. I was yelling “WooHooo”, not “Woooo”. Sadly, people were free to smoke cigarettes and cigars out in the open. Allegheny County cops were everywhere _except_ by the portajohns, so we were forced to meetup there to smoke weed. #downtrodden stoners. ---
**Author:** ![EllisDee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellisdee/32/4531_2.png) [@EllisDee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EllisDee)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2015, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/39 "2015-07-27T07:38:16Z")
> [@Clark\_Cello](#): > > The idea that people would want and expect to go to a concert and just sit in their seats and watch seems very weird to me. Don’t get me wrong, that’s one of the reasons I haven’t been in 20 years; that sort of thing doesn’t appeal to me as much as it once did. But every concert I have ever been to (and I went to quite a few when I was younger) had people standing up, dancing, cheering, shouting, etc. That’s kind of the whole point of a rock concert; the crowd feeds off the energy of the band and vice-versa. To just sit in your seat and listen seems very un-rock and roll to me. Agreed. I don’t know which I find more bizarre: People who want to sit in their seats as if they’re watching at home on the couch, or the idea that the bands are (what amounts to) employees, and we’re suckers for giving them our money. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2015, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233/40 "2015-07-27T08:44:13Z")
I went to a concert once in which I was in a very close packed standing area behind about four girls dancing vigorously in high heels. They nearly broke one of my toes, then the same to one of my friends, then another person standing next to us. There was no way for them to dance without doing this. Things got increasingly heated. The girls’ answer to everything was that they had a “right” to dance, and that we were uptight assholes who didn’t know how to have fun. Try having fun when someone lands on your toe with a spike heel, and see how you go. Perhaps this experience has coloured my view of the debate. However, my experience (frankly borne out by this thread, in spades) is that people who like to dance and scream at concerts consider their way of enjoying things to be unarguably legitimate, and consider that those who say they enjoy concerts some other way are lying or their enjoyment is somehow invalid. It is not my experience that people who don’t like to dance and scream at concerts hold the same views. Which says it all, really. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/concert-courtesy/726233.md?page=3)