# condom during mutual masturbation (?!) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 19, 2003, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015 "2003-12-19T18:12:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/21 "2003-12-20T01:58:23Z")
> [@](#): > > **phraser** : It’s not an unreasonable request from her from a safer sex perspective. It’s easy to get semen in your eye… Ah, my favourite mondegreen: _You are like a hurricane There’s cum in your eye. And I’m gettin’ blown away To somewhere safer where the feeling stays. I want to love you but I’m getting blown away._ ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/22 "2003-12-20T02:16:37Z")
I guess a cleveland steamer would be out of the question 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Duderdude2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cdc98d/32.png) [@Duderdude2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duderdude2)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/23 "2003-12-20T02:25:11Z")
Standup Karmic, way to go. Sex is very important to any relationship and it’s best to nail this problem in the ass before some kind of commitment takes form. I have never heard of someone who made their partner wear a condom during a hand job, that’s ridiculous. ---
**Author:** ![Matchka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/77aa72/32.png) [@Matchka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Matchka)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/24 "2003-12-20T03:04:42Z")
Lose her. Use your non-dominant hand. Your new “lover” will never err. ---
**Author:** ![Angel\_of\_the\_Lord](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/angel_of_the_lord/32/2949_2.png) [@Angel\_of\_the\_Lord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angel_of_the_Lord)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/25 "2003-12-20T03:54:21Z")
If you two are sharing the bed, this isn’t an unreasonable request. FWIW, when my fiance has visited down here, condoms for handjobs were the order of the day (I wasn’t about to deal with cleaning off the futon). Perhaps you could compromise in that, if you’re willing to wash the sheets right afterwards, she’ll forgo the condom? If you expect HER to do the sheets, you’re out of line. If those are YOUR sheets and she isn’t gonna be sleeping in them, she’s out of line. And for the love of GOD don’t admit to wearing the underwear you do it in. My ex did that. Imagine if your girlfriend told you “yeah, I don’t use pads/tampons/The Keeper/rags. I just let it flow like nature intended.” That’s how some of us feel. Knowing that it’s still in your shorts, we can’t sleep next to you. Weird hang up and all. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/26 "2003-12-20T04:17:08Z")
Also, is she on the Pill? The reason I ask is that in unusual but not unheard of cases, haven’t women gotten pregnant when their partners ejaculated near or on the vaginal area? Or if you have semen on your hands and touch her genitals? Far-fetched, but just so you know… ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/27 "2003-12-20T04:18:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Manduck \* > \*\*I guess a cleveland steamer would be out of the question 😃 \*\* I forgot what that is(and I’m from cleveland) ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/28 "2003-12-20T04:21:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by vanilla \* > \*\*I forgot what that is(and I’m from cleveland) \*\* I THINK it’s: when you take a dump on someone’s naked chest! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Algorithm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/algorithm/32/12204_2.png) [@Algorithm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algorithm)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/29 "2003-12-20T08:04:11Z")
AKA a “hot lunch.” ---
**Author:** ![Macrophage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/87869e/32.png) [@Macrophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Macrophage)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/30 "2003-12-20T08:36:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Giraffe \* > \*\*Tell her all your former girlfriends would give you blowjobs twice a day while you watched television. \*\* I laughed. Hard. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 9:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/31 "2003-12-20T09:29:06Z")
Am I the only one who has, during this entire thread, thought “Sweet Jesus, I hope **Alereon** wears silk socks and believes everyone else does, too”? ---
**Author:** ![Marlow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Marlow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlow)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/32 "2003-12-20T11:11:53Z")
Stick to your guns on this one. I mean, if you’re getting hand jobs, then you’re not really getting anything anyway. At worst, you’ll have to jerk yourself off, the horror. ---
**Author:** ![Sionach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Sionach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sionach)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/33 "2003-12-20T14:58:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by phraser \* > **It’s easy to get semen in your eye (so I’m told) in the heat of the moment, and that’s a no-no when it comes to safety.** Well, if you don’t point it at your face, you won’t get semen in your eye, now will ya? Just like a gun, it fires where you aim! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/34 "2003-12-20T17:07:38Z")
Sometimes? Am i the onlyone wondering why they cannot have oral or regular sex? WIll he keep us in the dark FOREVER?! ---
**Author:** ![LabRat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/898d66/32.png) [@LabRat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LabRat)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/35 "2003-12-20T18:50:22Z")
Ditto here for the Animal House reference. No offense meant, but it sounds like she gets her sex tips from Martha Stewart. Does she keep her pinkie extended? ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2003, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/36 "2003-12-20T20:13:34Z")
Unless you want to go on this way for the length of the relationship (which it doesn’t seem like you so), you must be able to talk about it openly and settle it. To me it seem like she is the one with a problem, it may be fear of giving you a STD as stated above or some hangup about the human body and natural biological fluids. If you are considerign a long term relationship perhaps she or both of you can see a counsler about this. ---
**Author:** ![blasphmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@blasphmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blasphmer)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2003, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/37 "2003-12-21T19:48:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\*I THINK it’s: > > when you take a dump on someone’s naked chest! > :eek: > \*\* Not Quite: > **[Urban Dictionary, October 19: infohazard](https://www.urbandictionary.com/)** > > A piece of information that can be dangerous for a reader to know about. Hot Lunch: The act of placing cellophane over your partner’s mouth, then deficating on the celophane. Your partner then takes your feces into his/her mouth and tongues it through the celophane. (Condom optional along with swallowing :eek: ) Cleveland Steamer When a guy sits on a girl’s chest and masturbates with his member in her crevice of breasts. The rubbing leaves a brown ass-trail skidmark. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2003, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/38 "2003-12-21T20:23:22Z")
Umm, how is that going to leave a skidmark, unless you haven’t wiped your ass? And if you’re in the habit of not wiping your ass, most people won’t want to have sex with you anyway. ---
**Author:** ![MinniePurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@MinniePurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MinniePurl)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2003, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/39 "2003-12-21T20:38:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Standup Karmic \* > \*\ ***Update:** > > She came by for a coffee this afternoon. I brought up the subject and told her I thought it was absurd and I’m not going to do it any more. She said that she knows how I feel about it and unless I wear one, I won’t be getting _anything_. I told her that, in fact, it was **my** ultimatum, not hers, and unless we go my way, _she’s_ cut off. > > She said she’ll think about it. \*\* This relationship doesn’t sound very satisfying from a sexual or emotional standpoint. I think you’d be better just moving on and finding someone who isn’t so weird about sex. I can’t imagine ever asking a man to do this. It’s just plain odd. ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2003, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015/40 "2003-12-21T21:43:11Z")
> [@](#): > > **Sex is very important** to any relationship and it’s best to **nail this problem in the ass** before some kind of commitment takes form. :eek: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/condom-during-mutual-masturbation/220015.md?page=3)