# Conjugal Visits? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [June 29, 2010, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893 "2010-06-29T04:36:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/1 "2010-06-29T04:36:08Z")
After the recent publicity of the (firing squad) execution here in Salt Lake, I was reading about the very strict, controlled conditions that visitors are allowed for a guy on death-row, and it got me wondering about something. Anyone know about the details of conjugal visits? It would seem to me that conjugal visits would be a perfect opportunity for contraband (drugs in particular) to find its way into the prisons. Of course, I am sure that the potential partners are searched, but are they body cavity examined? Is it only legally married inmates who are allowed to have CV’s? (For a single guy, they don’t just allow a casual girlfriend, or a girl from the local escort agency, right?) I would assume for eligible prisoners, the promise of a conjugal visit would be an incredibly strong motivation for good behavior—Are there studies that show that CV’s are beneficial for the penal (heh) system? ## Are they approved only for non-violent offenders? I realise that each state must have it’s own rules, guidelines and laws, but does anyone know any interesting details that they want to share? ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/2 "2010-06-29T11:43:16Z")
I believe that policies regarding conjugal visits vary by jurisdiction, ranging from quite liberal to absolutely forbidden. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/3 "2010-06-29T13:43:57Z")
> [@](#): > > It would seem to me that conjugal visits would be a perfect opportunity for contraband (drugs in particular) to find its way into the prisons. > > Of course, I am sure that the potential partners are searched, but are they body cavity examined? They absolutely are a means of smuggling in contraband. We don’t really search the visitor (they walk through a metal detector basically). But the prisoner is searched very thoroughly before and after the visit to prevent him from bringing anything back into the prison. This includes urine testing to see if he was talking any drugs during the visit. > [@](#): > > Is it only legally married inmates who are allowed to have CV’s? (For a single guy, they don’t just allow a casual girlfriend, or a girl from the local escort agency, right?) In New York, they have to be married. > [@](#): > > Are they approved only for non-violent offenders? Not necessarily. ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/4 "2010-06-29T14:18:33Z")
The website Prison Talk runs a discussion forum for prisoner’s families and ex-crims and parolees etc… [This topic](http://www.prisontalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=165061) is pretty old so it may be incorrect by now but it’s worth a look According to this site only New Mexico, Washington, Mississippi, Connecticut and California allow it anymore ---
**Author:** ![MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/5 "2010-06-29T16:39:02Z")
Thank you all for the responses—I figured that conjugal visits are not widely available for the average con, but as I stated in the OP, they must be amongst the most coveted privilege that a prisoner could be granted—Since so few states still allow for them, it seems that they must cause more problems that they are felt to be worth… I wonder how other countries handle conjugal visits. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/6 "2010-06-29T17:56:10Z")
> [@](#): > > According to this site only New Mexico, Washington, Mississippi, Connecticut and California allow it anymore You dropped New York off that list. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/7 "2010-06-29T20:52:12Z")
> [@Markxxx](#): > > According to this site only New Mexico, Washington, Mississippi, Connecticut and California allow it anymore California has about 20,000 gay/lesbian couples that were married before the Mormons halted that. Presumably if someone from one of those couples is sent to a California prison, they would be able to have conjugal visits from their spouse? ---
**Author:** ![Shmendrik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Shmendrik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shmendrik)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/8 "2010-06-29T21:29:29Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > California has about 20,000 gay/lesbian couples that were married before the Mormons halted that. Presumably if someone from one of those couples is sent to a California prison, they would be able to have conjugal visits from their spouse? I never knew there were 7 million Mormons in California. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/9 "2010-06-29T22:52:57Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > California has about 20,000 gay/lesbian couples that were married before the Mormons halted that. Presumably if someone from one of those couples is sent to a California prison, they would be able to have conjugal visits from their spouse? Well if you’re gay in prison, there’s no shortage of conjugal visits. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/10 "2010-06-29T23:22:18Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > Well if you’re gay in prison, there’s no shortage of conjugal visits. D’oh ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 8:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/11 "2010-06-30T08:23:31Z")
Princess Peach has got something special in her cake. ---
**Author:** ![UDS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecae2f/32.png) [@UDS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UDS)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/12 "2010-06-30T09:05:19Z")
> [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](#): > > I wonder how other countries handle conjugal visits. It might be less of an issue in other countries, where they mostly send fewer people to prison, and for shorter times. These visits are not mainly about sex; they’re about intimacy, and preserving intimate relationships. The hope is that if a prisoner can preserve his family relationships, he may have a better chance of making a sucessful life after release. Thus prisoners who are locked up for a stretch which is long enough to leave them institutionalised, and unable to cope with life outside, are the ones who might benefit most from this aspect of a conjugal visit programme. And there would be more such prisoners in the US than in most other countries. Which is not to say that it isn’t an issue for other countries for those prisoners that they do lock up for a longish stretch. A limited release programme serves the same function, and may to some extent substitute for a conjugal visit programme. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/13 "2010-06-30T15:02:17Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > In New York, they have to be married. I thought George Costanza had a conjugal relationship going with a female prisoner at one point on _Seinfeld_. It made him happy because he didn’t have to spend any time with her except when he chose to show up. ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/14 "2010-06-30T19:21:38Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > California has about 20,000 gay/lesbian couples that were married before the Mormons halted that. Presumably if someone from one of those couples is sent to a California prison, they would be able to have conjugal visits from their spouse? Connecticut also has legal same-sex marriage. And SSM in New York is in a weird grey area; same-sex couples cannot get married in-state, but can marry out-of-state and have those marriages recognized. So that’s 3 states where same-sex conjugal visits are possible. [QUOTE=Rigamarole] Well if you’re gay in prison, there’s no shortage of conjugal visits. [/QUOTE] Yes, because every gay man is promiscuous and unprotected sex with a random inmate is equivalent to intercourse with one’s life partner. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/15 "2010-06-30T20:15:21Z")
> [@alphaboi867](#): > > Yes, because every gay man is promiscuous and unprotected sex with a random inmate is equivalent to intercourse with one’s life partner. :rolleyes: Yes, because every statement made on the Internet is serious and in earnest. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/conjugal-visits/544893/16 "2010-06-30T20:17:11Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > I thought George Costanza had a conjugal relationship going with a female prisoner at one point on _Seinfeld_. It made him happy because he didn’t have to spend any time with her except when he chose to show up. His foundation had just made a large donation to the prison in question, so they probably relaxed the rules a bit for him. And now we know that fugitive sex is even better than conjugal visit sex.