# Connect Santa Claus and Middle-earth (or, another insane Tolkien thread) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 4, 2009, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/connect-santa-claus-and-middle-earth-or-another-insane-tolkien-thread/519990 "2009-12-04T15:48:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![TWDuke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@TWDuke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TWDuke)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2009, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/connect-santa-claus-and-middle-earth-or-another-insane-tolkien-thread/519990/21 "2009-12-05T03:36:17Z")
> [@robardin](#): > > Whatever happened to Saruman’s ring anyway, the one he made as “a child’s flattery” of the One Ring of Sauron which was cast into Mount Doom? _If_ the ring had any power to begin with, it would have lost it when the ruling ring was destroyed. (Compare the three elven rings.) > [@MeDrewNotYou](#): > > I wonder, is there anyway to keep ‘Santa’ from visiting at all? If I’m good he brings presents. If I’m bad he brings coal. Are there any rules for keeping Ringwraiths out of your house, or am I hiding in the attic all night with fake bodies in the beds? 1. Do not possess the ruling ring. 2. Do not associate with anyone who possesses the ruling ring. 3. Surround yourself with fire. (Author specifically disclaims any and all responsibility for injury, death, or property damage which may result.) 4. Surround yourself with water. 5. Keep the lights on at all times. 6. Spread rumors that you possess weapons that are the works of Westernesse, wound about with spells against the bane of Mordor. 7. Constantly invoke the name of Elbereth like you really mean it. 8. Invite powerful elves to stay overnight. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2009, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/connect-santa-claus-and-middle-earth-or-another-insane-tolkien-thread/519990/22 "2009-12-05T03:48:02Z")
I can’t find the thread now but in one thread it was speculated that Santa’s workshop is where you end up if you take the Straight Road north instead of west. ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2009, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/connect-santa-claus-and-middle-earth-or-another-insane-tolkien-thread/519990/23 "2009-12-05T03:48:51Z")
I thought Rankin-Bass already did that with _The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus_ (aka “Hobbit Claus”.) ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2009, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/connect-santa-claus-and-middle-earth-or-another-insane-tolkien-thread/519990/24 "2009-12-05T04:32:37Z")
> [@BrotherCadfael](#): > > According to the [Crackpot Tolkien Theories Page](http://flyingmoose.org/tolksarc/theories/theories.htm): Wow, that page still exists? I haven’t seen or looked at that page in like, ten years. (And I’m even responsible for [one of the entries](http://flyingmoose.org/tolksarc/theories/gandolt.htm) there!) That particular one was the one I had in mind, too! > [@TWDuke](#): > > _If_ the ring had any power to begin with, it would have lost it when the ruling ring was destroyed. (Compare the three elven rings.) Hmm, well, I was going to posit that it was built completely independently of Sauron and well after the other Rings, but the Elven Rings were also “untouched” by him but were linked to the One by underlying principles of some kind. So it does stand to reason that Saruman’s “flattery” would have operated under similar principles and thus also fail. ---
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2009, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/connect-santa-claus-and-middle-earth-or-another-insane-tolkien-thread/519990/25 "2009-12-05T04:43:58Z")
> [@robardin](#): > > Wow, that page still exists? I haven’t seen or looked at that page in like, ten years. (And I’m even responsible for [one of the entries](http://flyingmoose.org/tolksarc/theories/gandolt.htm) there!) That particular one was the one I had in mind, too! Gorcs. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Bartman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/779978/32.png) [@Bartman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bartman)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2009, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/connect-santa-claus-and-middle-earth-or-another-insane-tolkien-thread/519990/26 "2009-12-05T05:17:22Z")
> [@Larry\_Mudd](#): > > Well, the entrance _is_ at the North Pole. Santa lives near Thangorodrom? He has elves (probably Noldo given how crafty they are) twisted into an almost unrecognizable form? He must be Morgoth, or some Maia in his service. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/connect-santa-claus-and-middle-earth-or-another-insane-tolkien-thread/519990.md?page=1)