# Contribute to another story... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 6, 2000, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284 "2000-08-06T00:50:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/1 "2000-08-06T00:50:46Z")
Ya’ll try and keep your pants on this time, ok? (ahem) It was a dark and stormy night… ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/2 "2000-08-06T00:56:33Z")
and I was working the graveyard shift. I was downtown, outside the bus stop when the rain started… ---
**Author:** ![Shadowfox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Shadowfox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shadowfox)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/3 "2000-08-06T01:11:01Z")
I quickly ducked underneath the nearest doorway. Just then, a mysterious woman walked by… ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/4 "2000-08-06T01:15:18Z")
She was carrying a paper wrapped package, and kept looking over her shoulder. ---
**Author:** ![eyor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58956e/32.png) [@eyor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eyor)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/5 "2000-08-06T01:18:44Z")
As she was passing, I glanced at the bag and saw that it contained a duck, an empty soap dispenser, and one potato. ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/6 "2000-08-06T01:19:15Z")
She said “Hey! I work the night shift on this corner! Go get yourself a different corner or I’ll beat your ass!!” She had 6 inch heels, big hands, large biceps and a slight mustache, so I left. I began searching for another corner, walking slowly in the dark rainy night! Wondering what the hell was in that package… sex toys? The head of her ex-pimp? The questions began flooding my mind… ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/7 "2000-08-06T01:24:38Z")
…when suddenly a mauve weasel stepped through a hole in the space-time continuum and landed on the street in front of me, and was promptly run over by a Jeep. Then… ---
**Author:** ![Shadowfox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Shadowfox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shadowfox)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/8 "2000-08-06T01:29:20Z")
The Jeep, having the slimy remains of the weasel on its tires, careened out of control on the wet road and slammed into a … ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/9 "2000-08-06T01:33:18Z")
drunken Hobo. This really pissed the homeless man off!! He was so drunk that he did not realize his arm was ripped from it’s socket. He stood up and started waiving his good fist at the driver in anger. He yelled, "… ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/10 "2000-08-06T01:42:23Z")
A pox on all your houses!" ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/11 "2000-08-06T01:50:11Z")
The driver of the jeep got out, picked up the Bum’s arm and said, "… ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/12 "2000-08-06T02:18:01Z")
“Hey Pal, need a hand? HA HA HA !” ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/13 "2000-08-06T02:28:34Z")
ha ha ha ha ha ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/14 "2000-08-06T02:30:30Z")
Thanks, I needed that laugh!! On with the story: I kept walking, careful to mind my own business and not look anyone in the eye. Seven blocks down I found a nice corner. I hiked up my skirt and bushed the boobs up. Suddenly… ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/15 "2000-08-06T02:32:00Z")
Just then, the large-handed, slightly-mustachioed woman, who had been watchig all this. . . ---
**Author:** ![BlindFaithe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@BlindFaithe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlindFaithe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/16 "2000-08-06T06:30:35Z")
yelled at me something about an unarmed man but was sure the hobo had the one left … or was it right? I looked at the large-handed woman to find she’d gone into the liquor store to threaten the cashier there with her duck. From my place on the corner I could see the cashier … ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/17 "2000-08-06T11:41:18Z")
reach under the counter to either summon the police or get her gun. Suddenly… ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/18 "2000-08-06T12:50:58Z")
I dropped my pants. ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/19 "2000-08-06T19:14:12Z")
Whilst stooping down to pick them up, I noticed something shiny lying on the ground. It was. . . ---
**Author:** ![BlindFaithe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@BlindFaithe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlindFaithe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284/20 "2000-08-06T19:36:29Z")
my glass eye. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/contribute-to-another-story/28284.md?page=2)