# Convienience foods you have invented. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 18, 2014, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456 "2014-07-18T14:44:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/41 "2014-07-21T15:29:49Z")
“New Nabisco Tits! …corn tits, cheese tits, tater tits! Bet you can’t eat just one!” ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/42 "2014-07-21T15:56:09Z")
My contribution is uncooked oats stirred into vanilla yogurt. Additional mix-ins can include wheat germ (hi **salinqmind**!), dried cranberries, flax seeds, and raisins. But the oats are the key. It’s especially delicious when yogurt is near the bottom of the (big) yogurt container and you can dump and dump and dump in the yummies that you love. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/43 "2014-07-21T16:08:34Z")
Once when I was a kid, me and the siblings got creative in the kitchen. We had tried “suicides” - drinks where you mix all the flavors. So we thought we’d try some food combinations. I came up with the peanut butter and mayonnaise sandwich. :eek: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME! Seriously, I tried it, so you don’t have to. ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/44 "2014-07-21T16:22:14Z")
Not sure if this counts, since it requires some advance prep: 1 can of refried beans 1 package of that pre-cooked, pre-seasoned “Mexican Style” rice (Old El Paso brand, I think?) A few ounces of pre-cooked, pre-seasoned steak or chicken fajita meat, chopped into small pieces Your favorite hot sauce, to taste Put everything into a pan on the stovetop, heat it up, and mix it all together. Cool. Now, when you want a tasty burrito, just spoon some of this mixture onto a tortilla, add some shredded cheese, roll it up and nuke it in the microwave. ---
**Author:** ![bordelond](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bordelond/32/150_2.png) [@bordelond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bordelond)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/45 "2014-07-21T16:36:10Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > It definitely loses something in the transatlantic crossing. I have no idea either. Without researching, I’m assuming that a “toasty” is essentially akin to a “Hot Pocket”, “meat pie”, “pierogi”, “empanada” and such. Now off to Google to see if I guessed right 😃 EDIT: [this site](http://dictionary.reverso.net/english-definition/toasty) implies just a “toasted sandwich” … but the description given upthread seemed to imply a sealed edge. Is a “toasty” more like a “panini”? ---
**Author:** ![Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blue_blistering_barnacle/32/3386_2.png) [@Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blue_Blistering_Barnacle)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/46 "2014-07-21T17:13:20Z")
> [@PurpleClogs](#): > > Ha! I love that one! How bout we just put junk machines into the seat backs so you punch in which snack and drink you want, it drops a little cup and fills it right there on your tray. You should make it so that the harder you kick the seat in front of you, the better the snack! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lilihob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a9adbd/32.png) [@lilihob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lilihob)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/47 "2014-07-21T17:40:04Z")
Toastie [breville toasted sandwich maker - Bing images](http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=breville+toasted+sandwich+maker&FORM=HDRSC2#view=detail&id=02EF620D1EC03AEBCD2892FBBAF8CE8DA33419F1&selectedIndex=10) A truly great invention, saving students from starvation since the 80’s. ---
**Author:** ![Bozuit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Bozuit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bozuit)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/48 "2014-07-21T18:26:24Z")
> [@salinqmind](#): > > I’ve read this three times and still have no idea what you are talking about. > [@Leaffan](#): > > It definitely loses something in the transatlantic crossing. I have no idea either. > [@bordelond](#): > > Without researching, I’m assuming that a “toasty” is essentially akin to a “Hot Pocket”, “meat pie”, “pierogi”, “empanada” and such. Now off to Google to see if I guessed right 😃 > > EDIT: [this site](http://dictionary.reverso.net/english-definition/toasty) implies just a “toasted sandwich” … but the description given upthread seemed to imply a sealed edge. Is a “toasty” more like a “panini”? I appreciate the fact that someone eventually made it as far as Googling whatever was confusing them. I can’t imagine the amount of confusion one must face when reading new ideas without this skill. Is that the only source of confusion? I mean, I wrote that when I was barely awake and it’s not as clear as it could be, but “no idea”? Really? They’re all English words in a reasonably grammatical order. [Toastie maker with toasties](http://fussfreeflavours.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/Waring-Deep-Fill-Toastie-Maker.jpg). You close the lid and it seals the sandwiches while toasting. The ingredients for this particular toastie recipe are sliced bread, cheddar and red jalapenos from a jar. After making the toasties, you have triangle shapes, as shown in the photo. You can break a corner off and fill them with extra ingredients that can’t be added before cooking, such as beans. Our “baked beans” that come in cans here are a little different from the ones you get in the US, but I would expect both to work equally well. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/49 "2014-07-21T18:46:01Z")
When I saw one of these it was called a jaffle maker! That was in Asia, but still. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/50 "2014-07-21T18:55:20Z")
> [@Bozuit](#): > > …Take cheese and red jalapeno (from a jar) toasties. It sounds like toasties are coming from a jar. > [@](#): > > They should be sealed using one of those toastie maker things. Open up part of the toastie (you can bite a corner off) and stuff them with hot baked beans (from a can). Fucking tasty. Hot baked beans don’t come from a can. So, yeah it was a tad confusing. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/51 "2014-07-21T19:04:27Z")
“Kangaroo Eggs”. Scrambled eggs tucked into half a pita pocket. Perfect for breakfast on the go. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/52 "2014-07-21T19:32:02Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > “Kangaroo Eggs”. Scrambled eggs tucked into half a pita pocket. Perfect for breakfast on the go. Absolutely this. Enhanced by an order of magnitude if you add cheese and mushrooms. ---
**Author:** ![bordelond](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bordelond/32/150_2.png) [@bordelond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bordelond)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/53 "2014-07-21T19:33:10Z")
> [@Bozuit](#): > > Is that the only source of confusion? I mean, I wrote that when I was barely awake and it’s not as clear as it could be, **but “no idea”? Really? They’re all English words in a reasonably grammatical order**. > > [Toastie maker with toasties](http://fussfreeflavours.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/Waring-Deep-Fill-Toastie-Maker.jpg). You close the lid and it seals the sandwiches while toasting. The generic name of these devices is a “[sandwich toaster](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sandwich_toaster)”. I’ve seen these devices, but very rarely, in the U.S. They – and the toasties themselves – have very definitely never caught on in America for some reason. For most Americans over 40, the first, second, and third thing they’ll think of when you say “toasties” is [Post Toasties](http://www.cerealbits.com/gallery/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=4497&g2_serialNumber=2&g2_GALLERYSID=25d9f48ef96950792540e10f79295359) cereal. ---
**Author:** ![Bozuit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Bozuit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bozuit)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/54 "2014-07-21T20:08:16Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > It sounds like toasties are coming from a jar. That’s the part that I admit was potentially unclear. What I do, in such situations, is work out which interpretation actually makes sense, and assume that one was intended. > [@Leaffan](#): > > Hot baked beans don’t come from a can. Again, I must ask: really? Do you deliberately assume the least likely interpretation? I might just as well assume you were using “can” as a verb. In both of these two cases, I briefly considered rephrasing and didn’t come up with anything that didn’t have a considerably greater (and, I thought, unnecessary) word count. Anyway, it’s shorthand for the following recipe: **Ingredients** A can of baked beans. **Method** Remove beans from can. Heat beans in saucepan until hot. > [@bordelond](#): > > The generic name of these devices is a “[sandwich toaster](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sandwich_toaster)”. I’ve seen these devices, but very rarely, in the U.S. They – and the toasties themselves – have very definitely never caught on in America for some reason. > > For most Americans over 40, the first, second, and third thing they’ll think of when you say “toasties” is [Post Toasties](http://www.cerealbits.com/gallery/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=4497&g2_serialNumber=2&g2_GALLERYSID=25d9f48ef96950792540e10f79295359) cereal. That’s one generic term for it. I actually don’t like “toastie maker”, but I’ve found people better understand what I mean when I use that term. I often have to Google words or phrases used by Americans, or at least put a moderate amount of effort into working out meanings using context. For example, as far as I’m concerned, Parmesan cheese doesn’t come in cans. Because it’s cheese.\* I also put effort into modifying the language I use here to make it clearer to people who use different dialects. I even did with the “toastie” post (I don’t say “a _can_ of beans”, but “a _tin_ of beans”) although I admit I was a bit lazy because of the lateness and the nature of the thread, and obviously my judgement was off in that post. I don’t think it’s too much to ask that other people occasionally translate or Google where necessary. \*Neither does cheese come in tubes or sprays, by the way. ---
**Author:** ![Lukeinva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lukeinva/32/17872_2.png) [@Lukeinva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lukeinva)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/55 "2014-07-21T20:17:39Z")
> [@Bozuit](#): > > That’s the part that I admit was potentially unclear. What I do, in such situations, is work out which interpretation actually makes sense, and assume that one was intended. > > Again, I must ask: really? Do you deliberately assume the least likely interpretation? I might just as well assume you were using “can” as a verb. > > In both of these two cases, I briefly considered rephrasing and didn’t come up with anything that didn’t have a considerably greater (and, I thought, unnecessary) word count. > > Anyway, it’s shorthand for the following recipe: > > **Ingredients** > > A can of baked beans. > > **Method** > > Remove beans from can. Heat beans in saucepan until hot. > > That’s one generic term for it. I actually don’t like “toastie maker”, but I’ve found people better understand what I mean when I use that term. > > I often have to Google words or phrases used by Americans, or at least put a moderate amount of effort into working out meanings using context. For example, as far as I’m concerned, Parmesan cheese doesn’t come in cans. Because it’s cheese.\* I also put effort into modifying the language I use here to make it clearer to people who use different dialects. I even did with the “toastie” post (I don’t say “a _can_ of beans”, but “a _tin_ of beans”) although I admit I was a bit lazy because of the lateness and the nature of the thread, and obviously my judgement was off in that post. I don’t think it’s too much to ask that other people occasionally translate or Google where necessary. > \*Neither does cheese come in tubes or sprays, by the way. Here in the US a toasted sandwich with melted cheese is called a grilled cheese, and we put all sorts of stuff in with but this is the first time I’ve heard of beans. And it sounds like it’s worth a try. \*“…Remove beans from can. Heat beans in saucepan until hot…” \* TIP: Put the can directly on the burner and save on clean up. ---
**Author:** ![JR\_Brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d6d6ee/32.png) [@JR\_Brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JR_Brown)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/56 "2014-07-21T21:26:42Z")
Sardine pie. Less of a convenience food and more of a desperation recipe that turned out to be fairly successful. Take one can of sardines, preferably in oil. Drain and mash. Add minced garlic, dried oregano (crush it up a bit), and a just a little soy sauce. Crush about 6 saltine crackers (not too fine, keep them as chips not crumbs) and mix gently with a little oil (from the sardines if possible) and just enough water to make the mixture slightly cohesive (start with a few drops and increase if necessary). I prefer unsalted saltines, or a mixture of unsalted and a few salted if you have both; using only the salted ones can make the result too salty. Lightly press the cracker mixture into a small tart tin (or anything else that is shallow with a slightly cupped shape - a small heat-proof soup bowl is OK) and spread the sardine filling evenly in the middle. Bake in a medium oven (a toaster oven is fine) until the cracker edge is slightly browned and the filling is hot. Serves one as a snack or appetizer. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/57 "2014-07-21T21:30:46Z")
> [@Bozuit](#): > > … For example, as far as I’m concerned, Parmesan cheese doesn’t come in cans. … [https://www.etsy.com/listing/174477545/kraft-100-grated-parmesan-cheese?ref=market](https://www.etsy.com/listing/174477545/kraft-100-grated-parmesan-cheese?ref=market) That’s the old school version. Cardboard tube, metal top and bottom. Can-ish. Nowadays it’s all plastic, more of a container, I suppose. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/58 "2014-07-22T00:43:07Z")
I have two great inventions to my name. NASTY SNACK The origin of nasty snack was lean times in my early 20s, when extravagances like “Doritos” were out of reach. Even the thick, bland, slightly stale generic tortilla chips I bought seemed to go too quickly. I needed a snack that was flavorful and compelling, but not so delicious I’d eat more than a tiny bit. So, take a bowl of tortilla chips. Top with ample tabasco sauce. Eat. A big burst if taste and a little pain. One bowl is plenty to stop the snack craving. MAYONNAISE PASTA Peace Corps is the toughest job you’ll ever love, but seasonal markets in arid and remote areas are not a good fit for people who like to eat food every single day. Every year, as hot season dragged on, food would start to disappear from the markets. The tomatoes would leave. The cucumbers would leave. The guy from Nigeria who sometimes had eggplant would leave. And then, the final blow- they stacks of onions would get smaller, and the onions would grow shriveled and papery. The last vegetable would wane. What to eat? Well, should you find yourself in Cameroon, rest assured you are never far from mayonnaise. Glop it on your grilled fish. Spread it on your baguette. Dip your omelette in it. Almost any meal is served with a yellowish quivering dollop. And in time, you will love it. The sensation of pure, delicious, fatty calories will satisfy you like nothing else. So if you find yourself having to eat out of the pantry with no supermarket around for hundreds of miles, boil up some pasta. Add some mayonnaise. If you have an onion or a leftover strip of green pepper or a sad little tomato, dice it finely and throw it in. Eat while the pasta is deliciously hot and the mayo delightfully cold. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/59 "2014-07-22T02:45:23Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > Years ago when we worked together, my co-worker and I came up with something. > > We were talking about typography or something, and someone mentioned the ~ character, or, as I referred to it, the “squiggle”. > “But that one’s really small, shouldn’t it be a squiglito?” > “That sounds like some kind of snack food!” > > And then we had it: “Squiglitos, the Virtual Snack Food![sup]TM[/sup]” > > The idea was that there’d be a complete marketing campaign and everything, but no actual product. We came up with the main slogan, “Just because they’re not there doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy them!” But there were dozens of other slogans. > > I created a slogan-covered mug on Café Press and still have an example. This has tremendous marketing potential. It’s fat-free, gluten-free, no-carb, no-cal, and vegan. [del]Low[/del] No Weight Watchers points, inexpensive, and eligible for Food Stamps. Kosher _and_ Halal. You can’t lose! ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456/60 "2014-07-22T02:46:55Z")
1 can Hormel chili, no beans I can crushed pineapple (chunks or rings okay in a pinch) Liberal chunks of Velveeta cheese Mix together, microwave, Voila! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/convienience-foods-you-have-invented/693456.md?page=4)