# Cool things you know that you wish you didn't

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [November 2, 2018, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868 "2018-11-02T00:30:12Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/1 "2018-11-02T00:30:12Z")

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Example:  
I’ve found that large disposable medical pads like [these](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B006M5ZC5A) are really handy to use as small dropcloths. I use them to protect my workbench or table when painting, staining, gluing or doing other messy close-up work. I also use them to protect the floor around the temporary litter box when my son’s cat comes to visit. They’re reasonably cheap, less than 25 cents apiece in largish quantities.

Why I wish I didn’t know about this: I started trying them for various tasks when I ended up with a large number left over after my wife died of cancer, before which they were being used for unspeakable things I’d rather not remember.

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**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/2 "2018-11-02T01:23:43Z")

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those are also sold as puppy training pads and we use them for the same thing (under the litter box) at dollar tree

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**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/3 "2018-11-02T05:41:20Z")

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They ARE useful little fuckers, aren’t they? I practically hoarded them when my (spoiler alert) now late husband was hospitalized a few years ago.

His death was like a mule kick straight to the heart but it didn’t stop me from putting one under the kitty litter box.

UNRELATED I SWEAR but I know what gangrene smells like, so if I’m in a survivalist situation I guess I can tell you if that foot is gonna have to be sawed off. (That knowledge is courtesy of a small animal with a prolapsed uterus, and predates my husband’s illness by about a decade … also pretty sure he didn’t have a uterus.)

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**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/4 "2018-11-02T06:12:25Z")

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Every time I have learned how a magic trick works, I’ve regretted it. Much more fun to not know, often because the mechanism or technique is very mundane. I still enjoy wondering and speculating, but in the end I really don’t want to know.

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**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/5 "2018-11-02T07:55:16Z")

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I wish I didn’t know that the same sea otters who look so cute when they’re holding hands while asleep are also inter-species rapist-murderer-necrophiliacs.

It’s a cool fact to bring out (especially when someone foolishly tries to share cute sea otter memes with me), but I nevertheless wish I didn’t know it.

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**Author:** ![steatopygia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steatopygia/32/3132_2.png) [@steatopygia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steatopygia)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 9:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/6 "2018-11-02T09:18:29Z")

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I know how to remove stuff that doesn’t belong on your junk, off of your junk, without damaging your junk. Yes, I mean that junk.

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**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/7 "2018-11-02T14:51:26Z")

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^ Is that part of Test Pilot training?

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**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/8 "2018-11-02T15:17:03Z")

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> [@steatopygia](#):
>
> I know how to remove stuff that doesn’t belong on your junk, off of your junk, without damaging your junk. Yes, I mean that junk.

But why would stuff that doesn’t belong on my junk even _be_ on my junk, thus necessitating removal?

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**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/9 "2018-11-02T16:16:56Z")

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I know how to restrain a cat and shave its butt without help.

I know what it looks like when a dump truck collides with a bicyclist at 40 mph. Fascinating, but not exactly a good memory. _That_ was a fun first day of kindergarten. ☹

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**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/10 "2018-11-02T16:22:36Z")

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I know that if one of my dogs kills a critter and leaves it in the back yard and I don’t get rid of it, the maggots will come. They will make a squirming pile on top of the corpse and whittle it down to hollow bones.

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**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/11 "2018-11-02T16:24:16Z")

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My knowledge of giving sub-q hydration, insulin shots and ear sticks to cats is something I’d rather have remained blissfully ignorant of. ☹ I’d rather I didn’t know how a hanged person’s neck looks after they’re dead. I’d also really rather I’d never learned what happens when a tie rod breaks at freeway speeds. I also wish I knew considerably less than I do about how to cope with unmedicated bipolar people.

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**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/12 "2018-11-02T16:47:22Z")

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I’ve had LASIK, which means I know what burning eyeball smells like.

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**Author:** ![Ashtura](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ashtura/32/2963_2.png) [@Ashtura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashtura)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/13 "2018-11-02T16:52:33Z")

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What Gwendolyn Christie looks like naked (don’t do it).

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**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/14 "2018-11-02T16:59:38Z")

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> [@Knowed\_Out](#):
>
> I know that if one of my dogs kills a critter and leaves it in the back yard and I don’t get rid of it, the maggots will come. They will make a squirming pile on top of the corpse and whittle it down to hollow bones.

I just learned this too! They will also get a few inches down into the ground, so now i have a hole in my yard where the possum used to be.

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**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/15 "2018-11-02T17:25:53Z")

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Having had skin cancer removed, I know what it sounds like to have living flesh cut off with surgical scissors. Note to self: wear ear plugs next time.

I know how to humor an Alzheimer’s sufferer by pretending to believe whatever weird stuff they come up with, knowing that they’ll forget all about it in a few minutes. That’s not a happy memory.

Humoring a drunk person is quite similar to the Alzheimer’s thing.

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**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/16 "2018-11-02T18:25:23Z")

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Some women will do _anything_ for Cocaine.

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**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/17 "2018-11-02T19:10:09Z")

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If you sprain BOTH ankles do you still limp? I know the answer to that one.  
In my case, no

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**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/18 "2018-11-02T19:16:22Z")

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I wish I didn’t know what autopsy photos looked like.

I have a bad memory in a lot of areas, but I’ll never forget any of the autopsy photographs I’ve seen.

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**Author:** ![pudytat72](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@pudytat72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pudytat72)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/19 "2018-11-02T19:26:31Z")

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What the combination of gonorrhea and crab lice looks like.

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**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2018, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868/20 "2018-11-02T19:38:25Z")

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Not exactly the same, but related to the OP, I know that a sanitary napkin can be good in an emergency for covering a bad gash or other bloody injury. It’s clean and absorbent.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cool-things-you-know-that-you-wish-you-didnt/823868.md?page=2)
