# "Cops" show comes to Omaha; 1 dead **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 27, 2014, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680 "2014-08-27T20:05:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![Not\_Carlson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bc79bd/32.png) [@Not\_Carlson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_Carlson)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/261 "2014-09-11T04:48:24Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > . . . I’m not the type that your wives would marry, 'cause I’m a working-class man. I’m the type your wives cheat on you with. That pisses you guys off. Most of you are techno-bores whose entire lives were spent over some keyboard. When you were kids, you were bullied on the playground and didn’t like it but wouldn’t fight back. So, now, here, YOU guys are getting revenge for being pushed around a lot. . . \*NOW \*you’re doing it right! ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/262 "2014-09-11T10:50:52Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > I…because you think I’m a stupid former jock. … That’s what you get for presuming, I don’t think you are a former jock at all. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/263 "2014-09-11T12:15:47Z")
Former jock _strap_ maybe. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/264 "2014-09-11T12:18:54Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > I don’t think you should describe yourself with the word “wits.” Or “class.” “Cheat”, “piss”, “bully” and “stomp”, on the other hand… ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/265 "2014-09-11T12:20:22Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > I’m 62, in good shape, have all my hair and it’s not white, and my wits. I’m not the type that your wives would marry, ‘cause I’m a working-class man. I’m the type your wives cheat on you with. That pisses you guys off. Most of you are techno-bores whose entire lives were spent over some keyboard. When you were kids, you were bullied on the playground and didn’t like it but wouldn’t fight back. So, now, here, YOU guys are getting revenge for being pushed around a lot. You have become rhetorical bullies and you wanna’ stomp me and gain some revenge because you think I’m a stupid former jock. Well, I’m not. I played sports and could handle myself with bullies on the playground; but I’m also an intellectual and can hold my own with you academic types and I happen to be smarter than the majority of you. But not all. Those are the ones I want to converse with and the rest of you suffer from insecurity and can only find fault, or try anyway. But, I have never sought popularity and never had it. I’m interested in and trust in science and have immersed myself in the study of countless subjects in the natural sciences, history, psychology, and in biographies of the great and the not-so-great, and so on. I want to be friends. But I don’t need it. You, sir, are a shoo-in for this year’s _Who’s Who on the Straight Dope Message Board_. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/266 "2014-09-11T13:20:24Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > I’m not the type that your wives would marry, 'cause I’m a working-class man. I’m the type your wives cheat on you with. Do you think everyone worth addressing in this thread is male/lesbian? And speaking as a wife, I wouldn’t be even remotely interested in sleeping with you. Perhaps you’ve heard the aphorism, “Don’t stick your dick in the crazy”? As a woman, I follow the “Don’t let the crazy stick his dick in you” corollary. That kind of rules you out. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/267 "2014-09-11T13:51:02Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > I’m not the type that your wives would marry, 'cause I’m a working-class man. I’m the type your wives cheat on you with. Shut up and clean out the pool. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![common\_good](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@common\_good](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/common_good)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/268 "2014-09-11T17:16:18Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > Dude, this isn’t a dating site. Don’t call me dude, you gen. x tool. ---
**Author:** ![common\_good](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@common\_good](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/common_good)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/269 "2014-09-11T17:19:27Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > I don’t think you should describe yourself with the word “wits.” Or “class.” I don’t think you could moderate a game of checkers. We are each entitled to his opinion. Your’s carry virtually no weight so far. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/270 "2014-09-11T17:19:43Z")
Shut up, **dude**. ---
**Author:** ![common\_good](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@common\_good](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/common_good)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/271 "2014-09-11T17:21:13Z")
> [@CairoCarol](#): > > Do you think everyone worth addressing in this thread is male/lesbian? > > And speaking as a wife, I wouldn’t be even remotely interested in sleeping with you. > > Perhaps you’ve heard the aphorism, “Don’t stick your dick in the crazy”? As a woman, I follow the “Don’t let the crazy stick his dick in you” corollary. That kind of rules you out. Nor me with you, Madame. I don’t like arrogant, stupid broads. ---
**Author:** ![common\_good](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@common\_good](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/common_good)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/272 "2014-09-11T17:22:39Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Shut up and clean out the pool. > > Regards, > Shodan Before or after I hose the Mrs. ? Maybe we’ll do it in your pool. ---
**Author:** ![common\_good](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@common\_good](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/common_good)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/273 "2014-09-11T17:23:47Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Shut up, **dude**. Nice retort. What grade are you in, sonny ? ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/274 "2014-09-11T17:26:30Z")
Teacher! The creepy old guy in the hard hat showed us his wiener again! ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/275 "2014-09-11T17:27:26Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > Don’t call me dude, you gen. x tool. 1. I’ll call you whatever is permitted in this forum, dude. Feel free to continue to complain ineffectually about it. 2. I’m going to be 60 next week, you blithering idiot. 3. You might be better served to go back to sitting on your porch and yelling at the cops stepping on your lawn. You seem to be having significant issues with the whole message board thing. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/276 "2014-09-11T17:32:08Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > Before or after I hose the Mrs. ? Maybe we’ll do it in your pool. In all fairness, your best bet at getting laid would be in a cemetery. You’ll need a shovel though. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/277 "2014-09-11T17:32:55Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > 1. You might be better served to go back to sitting on your porch and yelling at the cops stepping on your lawn. You seem to be having significant issues with the whole message board thing. Now now…we all started somewhere. You’re never too old to learn how to insult people online. Maybe **common good** will get there. (ETA: Jesus, **El\_Kabong** , you’re fucking _ooooooold_. Happy birthday.) . ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/278 "2014-09-11T17:33:01Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > Nor me with you, Madame. I don’t like arrogant, stupid broads. That’s a double standard, isn’t it? After all, you expect the women you sleep with to put up with arrogant and stupid in spades. ---
**Author:** ![common\_good](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@common\_good](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/common_good)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/279 "2014-09-11T17:34:11Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > You, sir, are a shoo-in for this year’s _Who’s Who on the Straight Dope Message Board_. I won’t accept the award. I’m not trying to impress. I’m trying to teach you hopelessly academically-impaired blowhards. Can any of you point to a single post of mine which is false or fabricated in some way ? If you can’t, then sit down and shut up and learn. Courage is what it takes to stand and speak. Courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen. I don’t care whether or not you sit. Does this resonate at all with any of you so-called educated people ? Let us see. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2014, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680/280 "2014-09-11T17:34:47Z")
> [@common\_good](#): > > Nice retort. What grade are you in, sonny ? **silenus** teaches above _your_ grade. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cops-show-comes-to-omaha-1-dead/696680.md?page=15)