# Cornell frat suspended for game in which men compete to have sex with overweight women **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 7, 2018, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385 "2018-02-07T20:18:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Corry\_El](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecae2f/32.png) [@Corry\_El](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corry_El)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/61 "2018-02-10T18:28:20Z")
The issue I think embedded here is the old one of whether colleges with students who don’t live at home should be acting in part for or in lieu of the parents. You can make the argument the college has legitimate reasons to act against the fraternity assuming nothing of the sort and ‘everyone involved is an adult’ but in fact not really, even if technically/legally yes. On this basis I see no problem with it. It’s stupid behavior by, basically, kids against other kids and adults are supposed to squelch that where they can. If the frat has no legal basis to challenge that, and I guess they don’t, all the better. If it was real adults I’d still condemn the behavior, but might feel differently about an institution they were operating under telling them to play more nicely. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/62 "2018-02-10T18:31:55Z")
No, the issue here is that is the college a community that upholds community standards according to the code of conduct and the charter of greek organizations. This isn’t kids, its young adults. The college is not acting as their parents, its acting as a community. The community does not want to be harmed by the actions of a few yahoos. They have reserved the right in chartering the fraternity and within the student code of conduct to take action against this behavior as being harassing and/or sexually abusive. ---
**Author:** ![Corry\_El](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecae2f/32.png) [@Corry\_El](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corry_El)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/63 "2018-02-10T19:02:42Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > No, the issue here is that is the college a community that upholds community standards according to the code of conduct and the charter of greek organizations. > > This isn’t kids, its young adults. The college is not acting as their parents, its acting as a community. The community does not want to be harmed by the actions of a few yahoos. They have reserved the right in chartering the fraternity and within the student code of conduct to take action against this behavior as being harassing and/or sexually abusive. You’re free to disagree but I’ll stick with my opinion and not accept yours as fact you seem to phrase it as 🙂 . College kids are only technically adults, IMO. So the adults overseeing a ‘community’ of ‘young adults’ IMO have more reason to get involved in ways which wouldn’t be as appropriate if it was real adults all around, the extent to which ‘the community’ acts collectively against stuff that is not a crime (it’s not criminal harassment or abuse to say gratuitously cruel things about people behind their backs they might find out about, it’s just not right). So again I’d lean more toward the opinion of those saying the college overstepped if it wasn’t a college but a full fledged adult setting. That’s not an amateur legal opinion who could win a civil case either way in this or any different hypothetical case. It also doesn’t depend on ‘standards were promulgated’ because the extent to which you collectively force people to adopt behavior standards beyond following the law also depends who you’re dealing with. I have much less trouble with that if it’s not fully mature people, and college students by and large are not as a practical matter, IMO. ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/64 "2018-02-10T19:22:27Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > I’m assuming you are kidding, but because it actually is a prevalent attitude, it is not female-kind’s job to take responsibility for the actions of male-kind and make sure men behave. That is the job of society as a whole (after the responsibility of the misbehaving groups or individuals), and you can’t shift that responsibility over to women. Why should a sorority act if the college doesn’t? I think the job of society as a whole should be to reduce these appalling rape and sexual assault rates on our college campuses {[NIJ Report](https://www.nij.gov/topics/crime/rape-sexual-violence/campus/Pages/welcome.aspx)} … but _Slate_ knows it’s easier to read about frat pranks … I feel sorry for these women but 1 in 5 will be felony victims, a felony for which the perpetrator is never prosecuted … Waiting for the colleges to act may be a waste of time … I have no idea how to get little boys to keep their fingers to themselves … ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/65 "2018-02-10T19:54:12Z")
This is just a game for awkward loser frat boys to (try and) get themselves laid. At the expense of overweight women. Great citizenry there, frat boys. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/66 "2018-02-10T21:05:52Z")
> [@watchwolf49](#): > > I think the job of society as a whole should be to reduce these appalling rape and sexual assault rates on our college campuses {[NIJ Report](https://www.nij.gov/topics/crime/rape-sexual-violence/campus/Pages/welcome.aspx)} [snip] > > Waiting for the colleges to act may be a waste of time … I have no idea how to get little boys to keep their fingers to themselves … One way to go about it is to change attitudes, and that begins by showing that disrespect and harassment is not and should not be tolerated. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/67 "2018-02-10T21:55:28Z")
The state is already getting involved by giving this private boys’ club any sort of official recognition. **Octopus** , if you’re all aflutter about the nanny state, the only thing that makes sense is to recommend removing all official recognition from all private boys’ and girls’ clubs: there’s fuckall reason that the government should have any involvement with the Greek system, except to process the forms they file like everyone else and to punish its criminal and civil transgressions like everyone else. But that’s not the world we’re in: we’re in a world where frats are intimately intertwined with state functions. As long as that’s the case, frats need to take their lumps when they get out of line: if a penny of my tax dollars go toward facilitating their existence, they can damn well behave according to standards the public sets. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/68 "2018-02-10T21:59:00Z")
> [@watchwolf49](#): > > I think the job of society as a whole should be to reduce these appalling rape and sexual assault rates on our college campuses {[NIJ Report](https://www.nij.gov/topics/crime/rape-sexual-violence/campus/Pages/welcome.aspx)} … but _Slate_ knows it’s easier to read about frat pranks … I feel sorry for these women but 1 in 5 will be felony victims, a felony for which the perpetrator is never prosecuted … > > Waiting for the colleges to act may be a waste of time … I have no idea how to get little boys to keep their fingers to themselves … But waiting for a bunch of women in a Sorority to act is an appropriate response. Got it. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/69 "2018-02-10T22:02:18Z")
> [@Corry\_El](#): > > You’re free to disagree but I’ll stick with my opinion and not accept yours as fact you seem to phrase it as 🙂 . College kids are only technically adults, IMO. So the adults overseeing a ‘community’ of ‘young adults’ IMO have more reason to get involved in ways which wouldn’t be as appropriate if it was real adults all around, the extent to which ‘the community’ acts collectively against stuff that is not a crime (it’s not criminal harassment or abuse to say gratuitously cruel things about people behind their backs they might find out about, it’s just not right). > > So again I’d lean more toward the opinion of those saying the college overstepped if it wasn’t a college but a full fledged adult setting. That’s not an amateur legal opinion who could win a civil case either way in this or any different hypothetical case. It also doesn’t depend on ‘standards were promulgated’ because the extent to which you collectively force people to adopt behavior standards beyond following the law also depends who you’re dealing with. I have much less trouble with that if it’s not fully mature people, and college students by and large are not as a practical matter, IMO. Boys will be boys and until the boys reach some point of maturity, society just needs to accept that, even if women are sexually abused in the process. Got it. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2018, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/70 "2018-02-10T22:45:26Z")
> [@watchwolf49](#): > > Can’t the sorority houses fix this by just never ever having sex with any of those creeps … that’ll be a sorry ass frat house if no women ever visit … This x 1000. In a similar discussion on another board, one woman got pilloried for saying, “I’m going to not be PC, and say ‘Why the hell were some of those women there in the first place?’” I was one of them who agreed with her; there are places where women really shouldn’t go. Heck, there are places where PEOPLE shouldn’t go. ---
**Author:** ![SteveMonon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8491ac/32.png) [@SteveMonon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveMonon)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/71 "2018-02-11T00:44:02Z")
> [@aldiboronti](#): > > OK, pig roast as a title is totally offensive and well out of order. I’m sorry, why do you consider it offensive? If a woman is fat, she should be called out on it. If she doesn’t find it offensive, there’s no harm. And if she does consider it offensive (and if she is, indeed, fat), it should be a nice incentive for her to stop shoveling food into her mouth and exercise more. Fat shaming works and does wonders: look at recent [picture of Amy Schumer](https://s.yimg.com/uu/api/res/1.2/uld6R5IJMuNhg80zYZuCcQ--/Zmk9c3RyaW07aD0xMTM4O3c9NjQwO3NtPTE7YXBwaWQ9eXRhY2h5b24-/http://media.zenfs.com/en/homerun/feed_manager_auto_publish_494/ce183f39363153718bbf39257ba8909a) where it looks like she finally made a half-decent attempt to lose some weight. She’s still over-weight, but out of obese territory. We live in an age, where a major political figure can win elections with a single [hilarious (and historical) joke](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9lcr-wsYOk) about woman’s weight. Watch closely as women in the audience roar with laughter as Rosie O’Donnell gets demolished for (among other things) being a fatso. Hopefully, we’re coming closer and closer as a society to a state, where calling out someone for being fat is not only acceptable, but applauded. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/72 "2018-02-11T01:21:47Z")
BTW, you earned a special mention in a special thread in a special place. Good job. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/73 "2018-02-11T01:42:11Z")
SteveMonon: sorry to have to tell you, but you made a typo in your username. ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/74 "2018-02-11T02:48:49Z")
> [@SteveMonon](#): > > I’m sorry, why do you consider it offensive? > If a woman is fat, she should be called out on it. If she doesn’t find it offensive, there’s no harm. And if she does consider it offensive (and if she is, indeed, fat), it should be a nice incentive for her to stop shoveling food into her mouth and exercise more. Fat shaming works and does wonders: look at recent [picture of Amy Schumer](https://s.yimg.com/uu/api/res/1.2/uld6R5IJMuNhg80zYZuCcQ--/Zmk9c3RyaW07aD0xMTM4O3c9NjQwO3NtPTE7YXBwaWQ9eXRhY2h5b24-/http://media.zenfs.com/en/homerun/feed_manager_auto_publish_494/ce183f39363153718bbf39257ba8909a) where it looks like she finally made a half-decent attempt to lose some weight. She’s still over-weight, but out of obese territory. > > We live in an age, where a major political figure can win elections with a single [hilarious (and historical) joke](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9lcr-wsYOk) about woman’s weight. > Watch closely as women in the audience roar with laughter as Rosie O’Donnell gets demolished for (among other things) being a fatso. > Hopefully, we’re coming closer and closer as a society to a state, where calling out someone for being fat is not only acceptable, but applauded. You’re being issued a warning for trolling. It’s difficult to see this as anything other than an attempt to rile up other people. ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/75 "2018-02-11T03:22:32Z")
> [@SteveMonon](#): > > I’m sorry, why do you consider it offensive? > If a woman is fat, she should be called out on it. If she doesn’t find it offensive, there’s no harm. And if she does consider it offensive (and if she is, indeed, fat), it should be a nice incentive for her to stop shoveling food into her mouth and exercise more. Fat shaming works and does wonders: look at recent [picture of Amy Schumer](https://s.yimg.com/uu/api/res/1.2/uld6R5IJMuNhg80zYZuCcQ--/Zmk9c3RyaW07aD0xMTM4O3c9NjQwO3NtPTE7YXBwaWQ9eXRhY2h5b24-/http://media.zenfs.com/en/homerun/feed_manager_auto_publish_494/ce183f39363153718bbf39257ba8909a) where it looks like she finally made a half-decent attempt to lose some weight. She’s still over-weight, but out of obese territory. > > We live in an age, where a major political figure can win elections with a single [hilarious (and historical) joke](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9lcr-wsYOk) about woman’s weight. > Watch closely as women in the audience roar with laughter as Rosie O’Donnell gets demolished for (among other things) being a fatso. > Hopefully, we’re coming closer and closer as a society to a state, where calling out someone for being fat is not only acceptable, but applauded. This could work! I think you should do a field test and tell every overweight woman you see all that you told us. Let us know how it goes. What about overweight men? I think you should try it with them, too. Have fun! ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/76 "2018-02-11T04:55:05Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > This x 1000. > > In a similar discussion on another board, one woman got pilloried for saying, “I’m going to not be PC, and say ‘Why the hell were some of those women there in the first place?’” I was one of them who agreed with her; there are places where women really shouldn’t go. Heck, there are places where PEOPLE shouldn’t go. Because at some colleges - and Cornell is one of them, Greek life is part of having a social life for a large proportion of the campus. We expect to be able to go to a party and not get roofied or sexually assaulted. To live our lives assuming that every guy out there is a predator is a difficult way to live your life, and it really isn’t fair to the guys who aren’t. So young women go to frat parties. Because that’s where other people are. Because that is where your friends are, or you might meet friends, or you might meet someone who turns into a romance - or even, you might hook up with someone. Once again, women should not have to be responsible for men being dicks. And if we are going to be responsible, then men have to stop complaining when we treat every single one of you as a potential rapist or harasser. When we believe every story told by every woman about how you treated her. You don’t get it both ways. Either don’t blame us and look to us for solutions on your misbehaving gender - or don’t blame us when we write all of you off as assholes or when the bar for you proving to us that you aren’t is really high. ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/77 "2018-02-11T04:59:12Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > This x 1000. > > In a similar discussion on another board, one woman got pilloried for saying, “I’m going to not be PC, and say ‘Why the hell were some of those women there in the first place?’” I was one of them who agreed with her; there are places where women really shouldn’t go. Heck, there are places where PEOPLE shouldn’t go. Women shouldn’t go to parties? ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/78 "2018-02-11T05:38:56Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > The state is already getting involved by giving this private boys’ club any sort of official recognition. **Octopus** , if you’re all aflutter about the nanny state, the only thing that makes sense is to recommend removing all official recognition from all private boys’ and girls’ clubs: there’s fuckall reason that the government should have any involvement with the Greek system, except to process the forms they file like everyone else and to punish its criminal and civil transgressions like everyone else. > > But that’s not the world we’re in: we’re in a world where frats are intimately intertwined with state functions. As long as that’s the case, frats need to take their lumps when they get out of line: if a penny of my tax dollars go toward facilitating their existence, they can damn well behave according to standards the public sets. Well, having consensual sex with another is none of your business. Even if it’s motivated in part by a contest. Why is it the university’s place to stick its nose in private affairs? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/79 "2018-02-11T05:44:28Z")
> [@SteveMonon](#): > > I’m sorry, why do you consider it offensive? > If a woman is fat, she should be called out on it. If she doesn’t find it offensive, there’s no harm. And if she does consider it offensive (and if she is, indeed, fat), it should be a nice incentive for her to stop shoveling food into her mouth and exercise more. Fat shaming works and does wonders: look at recent [picture of Amy Schumer](https://s.yimg.com/uu/api/res/1.2/uld6R5IJMuNhg80zYZuCcQ--/Zmk9c3RyaW07aD0xMTM4O3c9NjQwO3NtPTE7YXBwaWQ9eXRhY2h5b24-/http://media.zenfs.com/en/homerun/feed_manager_auto_publish_494/ce183f39363153718bbf39257ba8909a) where it looks like she finally made a half-decent attempt to lose some weight. She’s still over-weight, but out of obese territory. > > We live in an age, where a major political figure can win elections with a single [hilarious (and historical) joke](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9lcr-wsYOk) about woman’s weight. > Watch closely as women in the audience roar with laughter as Rosie O’Donnell gets demolished for (among other things) being a fatso. > Hopefully, we’re coming closer and closer as a society to a state, where calling out someone for being fat is not only acceptable, but applauded. So, can we see a picture of you? Just for academic purposes, mind you. 😉 (Bonus points if you’re wearing a fedora) ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2018, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385/80 "2018-02-11T05:49:59Z")
> [@raventhief](#): > > Women shouldn’t go to parties? My point is that the problem with this frat would solve itself if women refused to date any of the men who belong to it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cornell-frat-suspended-for-game-in-which-men-compete-to-have-sex-with-overweight-women/808385.md?page=5)