# Corrupt Wish Game!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 2, 2003, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951 "2003-11-02T04:37:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 15
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/281 "2003-11-08T13:59:55Z")
```auto You never forget to wish again, you spend all your days longing to have the unobtainable. You can't help yourself. You can be found standing around wishing wells for hours. You go to other peoples birthday parties in hopes that you can be the one who blows out the candles, just so you can make a wish. I wish I hadn't spend so much money last night. ``` ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/282 "2003-11-08T19:26:27Z")
_da da da dum_ You didn’t spend so much money last night. You spent SOOOOOO much money last night that your now bankrupt. Have a nice day. I wish for a chocolate Jesus. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/283 "2003-11-08T19:37:17Z")
_Phlumph_ All hail **Vlad Dracul** , beloved overlord and god-king, whose word is law! Behold, how **nocturnal\_tick** , blessed owner of a chocolate Jesus, advances in awestruck homage to lay his priceless boon before the dread monarch’s throne! His Majesty is pleased to accept this humble token of gratitude from the least of his subjects. He is pleased to take up the chocolate Jesus from the hands of the lackey who has conveyed it to him. Aye, indeed – he is pleased to bite off its head and much contentedly as AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!! The venomous serpent concealed within the hollow figure has sprung out and fastened its fangs in **Vlad Dracul’s** face! OUr beloved overlord falls to the throne room floor, writhing in terminal agony! The guards rush forward – too late to save their master, yet in time to capture **nocturnal\_tick** as the craven traitor attempts to flee! What torments await the slayer of his lord and master? I still wish Hollywood would stop making stupid remakes of movies that were perfectly fine the first time. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/284 "2003-11-08T19:59:02Z")
_Bzzownt!_ Hollywood stops making stupid remakes of movies that were perfectly fine the first time. In the latest _Variety_ you discover to your horror that Hollywood is making stupid remakes of movies that were perfectly _awful_ the first time. George Lucas’ Imax presentation of Pink Flamingos is set for a July 2004 release. I wish I was in very good physical shape. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/285 "2003-11-08T20:01:41Z")
_Bwweeeeemp_ **Sunspace** is in the best physical shape ever! Which is, of course, a perfect sphere. I wish taxes were abolished. ---
**Author:** ![Amberlei](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e56c9b/32.png) [@Amberlei](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amberlei)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/286 "2003-11-08T20:01:51Z")
Bada-boom bada-bing! In deference to EddyTeddyFreddy’s wish, hollywood no longer makes stupid remakes of movies that were perfectly fine the first time. They’ve changed their movie making system to ensure that NO movies are perfectly fine the first time, thereby begging a remake. Unfortunately, the remakes of the not perfectly fine first time movies are just as stupid as the ones they used to make back when the first time around movies were good. I wish someone would come do the rest of my housework today. ---
**Author:** ![Amberlei](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e56c9b/32.png) [@Amberlei](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amberlei)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/287 "2003-11-08T20:08:17Z")
Ack you people post fast! Bada-boom Bada-bing! All taxes are abolished. Unfortunately, this means that we now have to stop and pay fourteen individual tolls (one for road maintenance, one for the dmv, one for police funding, one for fire department funding, etc. etc. etc. )on each and every road we drive on. This makes it impossible to get anywhere on time, and everyone winds up being fired for habitually showing up to work 4 hours late. I still wish someone would come do the rest of my housework. ---
**Author:** ![Vlad\_Dracul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/50afbb/32.png) [@Vlad\_Dracul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vlad_Dracul)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/288 "2003-11-08T20:44:53Z")
Someone arrives to do Amberlei’s housework. It’s a team of smiling, cheerful, good-looking androids with excellent manners and impressive work ethic. Soon, Amberlei’s house is spotless. Then, the happy workers start with a little fixing-up. Squeaky hinges, misaligned moldings, etc. Then, they add on a couple of new rooms. Amberlei starts to get annoyed at the noise and asks them to leave, but they don’t! They continue to work. Amberlei calls the police, but the happy workers prove to be unstoppable! More of them arrive, holding a perimeter that keeps everyone out but Amberlei, while the work continues… massive reconstruction on a scale not seen since Sarah Winchester went insane and kept re-modeling going on her mansion day and night for 40 years. The hassle of living in a project house is too much for Amberlei, but no one will buy a house that is haunted by unstoppable remodeling robots. Amberlei is trapped in an everlasting episode of “Monster House”, her only escape… sweet, sweet death! Given ETF’s corruption of my wish… I wish that I was immune to serpent venom, this wish to be applied retroactively to my date of birth. ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/289 "2003-11-08T20:44:57Z")
```auto Molly maid shows up to do the rest of your housework today. They take everything with them when they go. I wish my kids would eat their dinner. ``` ---
**Author:** ![umop\_ap\_sdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/dbc845/32.png) [@umop\_ap\_sdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/umop_ap_sdn)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/290 "2003-11-08T20:45:20Z")
_Kazundheit_ A robot shows up at your door and offers to do all your housework. Unfortunately, the robot has a bug in its program and goes berzerk. Gee, I’ve heard of a bull in a china closet but never a robot! I wish my cat would stop going into heat. ---
**Author:** ![umop\_ap\_sdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/dbc845/32.png) [@umop\_ap\_sdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/umop_ap_sdn)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/291 "2003-11-08T20:47:31Z")
Whoops! Triple simulpost! Poof! **misstee** ’s kids eat their dinner, unfortunately the farmers have gone on strike and the only thing there is to eat anymore is candy. (I’ll let someone else field **Vlad Dracul** ’s wish.) ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/292 "2003-11-08T20:48:01Z")
```auto Your cat stops going in to heat, the vet says s/he is dead. Sorry. :( I agian wish my kids would eat their dinner. ``` ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/293 "2003-11-08T20:50:00Z")
My wish was granted– I know wish I could type, \< again \> ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/294 "2003-11-08T20:58:14Z")
Blinq! You now can type, but only on a typewriter. I wish I was Chancellor of the European Union… ---
**Author:** ![Vlad\_Dracul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/50afbb/32.png) [@Vlad\_Dracul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vlad_Dracul)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/295 "2003-11-08T21:08:30Z")
Governor Quinn’s name is now Quinn Chancellor, and he or she is a citizen of the European Union… a citizen who is wanted by Interpol for numerous crimes against humanity, including the management of a Nazi death camp. Still wishing for… immunity to… serpent venom… can’t feel my legs… help me… (gasp)… it’s all going black… ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/296 "2003-11-08T21:12:28Z")
You know have immunity to serpent venom, but not to snake venom. I wish that there was some kind of way out of here. ---
**Author:** ![Vlad\_Dracul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/50afbb/32.png) [@Vlad\_Dracul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vlad_Dracul)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/297 "2003-11-08T21:12:51Z")
Oh, just for clarity, I should point out that since Chancellor managed a Nazi death camp, he or she is well over 90 years old. ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/298 "2003-11-08T21:16:25Z")
BTW, it would be **Chancellor Quinn** , not **Quinn Chancellor**. ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/299 "2003-11-08T22:41:44Z")
There _is_ a way out of here, but you don’t find it. I wish for a good roll in the hay with Sean Connery. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2003, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/300 "2003-11-08T23:10:09Z")
_Blongalongalong_ What a charming picture, **Zoe** – you and Sean Connery, sitting side by side in a hayloft, devouring with delight a platter of hot cross buns. Will you pour another cup of tea? I wish I had a good hot cup of tea right now. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951.md?page=14) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951.md?page=16)