# Corrupt Wish Game!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 2, 2003, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951 "2003-11-02T04:37:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/321 "2003-11-09T14:39:16Z")
_Shazoooooooom_ **puggyfish** , wish granted! You’ll never need to sleep again, because you’ll always have with you **BigDaiv** , nattering on endlessly in Japanese. Since **BD** sounds just like John Belushi in a _Saturday Night Live_ skit, you’ll be helplessly laughing all the time, until your inability to do anything else starves you to death. **BigDaiv** then, in a fit of remorse, commits hara-kiri. I wish I had dragonlady fingernails. ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/322 "2003-11-09T14:43:31Z")
**ETF** you now have dragonlady fingernails however now everytime you put some clothes on you tear them to pieces and must walk around naked also everytime you try to stroke Eddy Teddy Freddy or any of your other 5 cats you impale them ☹ i wish that all the ducks are swimming in the water tralalalalalaa tralalalalalalaa ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/323 "2003-11-09T16:53:49Z")
All of the ducks are swimming in the water. The water being Lake Heron, and it freezes. How do you feel knowing that you killed all the little duckies? People stare at you everywhere you go, they mock you, they hate you. All because of your silly little wish killing the duckies. I wish I hadn’t ate so much breakfast. ---
**Author:** ![Amberlei](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e56c9b/32.png) [@Amberlei](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amberlei)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/324 "2003-11-09T18:22:17Z")
~AlaPeanutButterSandwiches~ With a wave of my wand, Misstee is transported back in time to just before breakfast. As she sits down to eat, she suddenly finds that the sight of breakfast foods makes her nauseous. So much so that she’s unable to eat anything at all until afternoon. I wish I only had to shave my legs once a year. ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/325 "2003-11-09T18:45:52Z")
```auto You only have to shave you legs once a year now, as you only leave your house once a year. You are a lonely old woman who only ventures out on July 23 of every year to visit you gynecologist. I wish I could take a nap. ``` ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/326 "2003-11-09T19:25:59Z")
**@@** J \* U \* M \* A \* N \* J \* I **@@** Your nap begins instantly, unfortunately you are in a hot tub and slip under the water unnoticed… DUNT DUNT DAAHHH I wish the best part of this post were the magical utterances used to indicate the granting of wishes. ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/327 "2003-11-09T19:40:00Z")
_wicky wicky slim sausage_ All magical utterances are the best part of this thread. But then the wishes are just really bad. They’re so bad in fact that the moderators close MPSIMS altogether. WTG **SiXSwordS** :mad: I wish that I win the £1500 prize for my poem. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/328 "2003-11-09T19:48:13Z")
**boinkboinkbababoink** And a prize-winning poem it is! 1500 pounds to **nocturnal\_tick**!! 1500 pounds of rancid lard. In a 1000-pound container. I wish the ticks would stop attaching themselves to my horses – I just hate having to pick them off. ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/329 "2003-11-09T19:55:53Z")
hey **ETF** I said pounds sterling. So you don’t like the ticks on your horses? _SPOON!_ Now the ticks are attached to you and they got a taste for that rancid lard that you gave me which I’m returning out of cruelty. BWAA HAA HAA HAA I’m sorry, that was wrong. Oh well ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/330 "2003-11-09T19:57:10Z")
oh yeah I WANT MY MONEY!!! thanks ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/331 "2003-11-09T20:02:56Z")
Okay, okay – you can have your blasted money. Here, here’s your 1500 pounds sterling: In pence. A trail of pennies, in fact. Dropped at the rate of one pence per meter. In a random pattern. Over heathland. Happy hunting! I wish it wasn’t so controversial to wear fur. ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/332 "2003-11-09T20:21:29Z")
Alright **ETF** _supercalifragilisticexpialidocious_ When you go into town in your fur coat no-one thinks any wiser. In fact they all look at you with devout interest, because you are a fox and it’s hunting season, baby. I wish for myself and **EddyTeddyFreddy** to have large, yet equal armies to wage war against each other. ---
**Author:** ![j\_sum1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8baadc/32.png) [@j\_sum1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j_sum1)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/333 "2003-11-09T21:26:16Z")
Mass killings are so unfulfilling. But if you so wish… Dum da da dum. There done. Now we won’t hear from either of you again. And I for one am sad. ☹ I wish that I was crazier than a bald-headed freak-faced flipped-out postal worker on speed with one eye poked out by a blunt stick. ---
**Author:** ![puggyfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3ab097/32.png) [@puggyfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puggyfish)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/334 "2003-11-09T21:37:43Z")
Bleruughhg!! WEEE! WEEEIEIE!! FLurglE! Youz is Kerayzee! In fact, you’re so crazy you’re talent-spotted and put on national TV. Just you being crazy, for an hour, for a whole season. However, the public have short attention spans. So the TV network comes up with a new show for you - **j\_sum1** ’s Psychiatric Sessions. And you know what? That damned psychiatrist cures you. So now you see the videos of you makeing a complete arse of yourself and feel so nostalgic that you shave your head (and cauterise it just to be on the safe side), bash in your face and backflip around while taking speed after having removed one of your eyes with a blunt stick. But it isn’t quite the same. ---
**Author:** ![puggyfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3ab097/32.png) [@puggyfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puggyfish)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/335 "2003-11-09T21:39:00Z")
Sorry, I forgot to wish for a newt. A big juicy one! ---
**Author:** ![puggyfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3ab097/32.png) [@puggyfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puggyfish)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/336 "2003-11-09T21:41:39Z")
Aaah! I also missed out the postal worker bit! Can I wish that I’d put that in too? ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/337 "2003-11-09T21:42:25Z")
_Arararararararagggghhhhh_ **puggyfish** , your wish is granted! Here’s your big, juicy newt: Newt Gingrich, covered in precious bodily fluids from his latest giraffe hunt! Bwa-hahahahahaha!!! I wish **nocturnal\_tick** would try to get some blood from **Vlad Dracul** – now, _that_ I’d pay to see. ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/338 "2003-11-09T21:56:13Z")
WAZIKASHIMANSU you get the chance to pay to see **nocturnal\_tick** versus **Vlad Dracul** but you cant afford it no matter what i wish that weekends were longer ---
**Author:** ![stormchaser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c4cdca/32.png) [@stormchaser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stormchaser)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/339 "2003-11-09T23:11:06Z")
**shazaam**** bigdaiv** weekends are now longer by 2 whole days— unfortunately now there are 4 more weekdays in a week. Thanks a lot I wish Iowa’s climate was more like Florida’s climate ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2003, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/340 "2003-11-09T23:19:28Z")
Krajewski! It now is just like Florida’s climate- north Florida’s. I wish that every dead entertainer would come back to life… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951.md?page=18)