# Corrupt Wish Game!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 2, 2003, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951 "2003-11-02T04:37:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 33
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/641 "2003-11-19T18:13:52Z")
_braaaaap_ France enacts a law against femine body hair (heads and pubes excepted). The good news: resulting fines make France the richest country in the universe and they stop whining for a few days. The bad news: many women resent this intrusion into their personal lives and leave the country. Belgium being nearby, most go there. In three weeks you find yourself sharing a building with 83 hairy French women, none of whom know how to _parley vouz_. I wish GWB would misplace his passport and be detained for an indefinite term by British immigration officials. ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/642 "2003-11-19T18:22:00Z")
[don’t give me no grief 'bout _femine_ - it’s a cross between feline and feminine] ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/643 "2003-11-19T18:48:18Z")
Poof GWB is detained in Britain but that makes VP Cheney President. Unfortunately, he lives up to his name, Dick. I wish that the poster after the one who corrupts this wish will fall into a well and find true happiness. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_scratch\_fever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/73ab20/32.png) [@Cat\_scratch\_fever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_scratch_fever)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/644 "2003-11-19T19:40:14Z")
o me me ! I fall into a well and find true happiness but I’m, like, uh, happy in the bottom of a WELL. I wish that the Target Greatland near my home wasn’t so getto. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_scratch\_fever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/73ab20/32.png) [@Cat\_scratch\_fever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_scratch_fever)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/645 "2003-11-19T19:41:57Z")
ooo now i get it, sorry - i don’t fall into the well, the NEXT guy does sorry ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/646 "2003-11-19T19:56:12Z")
It looks like I find true happiness at the bottom of a well, what the heck was true happiness doing at the bottom of a well anyway? Target Greatland near your home isn’t so getto anymore, because the people living their have all been evicted. They also found out who caused that to happen, and they are now living in your home, and aint happy about what you did. I wish I knew what this ‘true happiness’ is doing at the bottom of this well. And can someone lend me a ladder so I can get out of this well, please. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/647 "2003-11-19T21:16:25Z")
Here’s your ladder, **Bippy**. Careful now that you’re at the top because OOOOPS! I guess I should have told you about the lava pit before you climbed up, huh? But at least now you know why true happiness for you was at the bottom of that well rather than the top. I wish my car never slides into a ditch this winter. ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/648 "2003-11-19T21:56:29Z")
bang bom bingle you car never slides into a ditch this winter because it has been reposessed on the grounds that you didnt pay your petrol bills, so you now have to cycle to work however your bike slides into a ditch i wish for a monkey with an iq of 100 and who is willing to rid me of my sister. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_scratch\_fever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/73ab20/32.png) [@Cat\_scratch\_fever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_scratch_fever)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/649 "2003-11-19T22:06:55Z")
mmm monkeys You inherit a monkey with an iq of 100, who rids you of your sister and, incedentaly wears roller skates, a derby, and smokes cigars. The only problem is that the monkey is more popular than you and your family and friends favor the monkey to your company. Even on the Strraight Dope message boards, the monkey becomes BigDaiv. I wish for the demise of the phone company. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/650 "2003-11-19T22:11:49Z")
_OOK_ You have a monkey with an IQ of 100, who is willing to rid you of your sister. Your sister is emthralled by the monkey’s intelligence, cunning, and sheer animal power. She runs away with him. After a world-famous court case in The Hague, the monkey is declared a citizen, co-equal with humans, and with all the rights and responsibilities of that status. Your sister willingly marrys him. They make a fine couple, advancing research in genetic engineering, winning two Nobel Prizes, and ultimately leaving a great charitable foundation. She never has time for you again. You die of loneliness and neglect. I wish that cheque promised to me was in my hands. ---
**Author:** ![Jonmarzie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/50afbb/32.png) [@Jonmarzie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonmarzie)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2003, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/651 "2003-11-19T23:17:14Z")
The cheque is in your hands, but it’s much much less than you had hoped. In fact, it’s for a measley penny. I wish I got all my homework done… ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_scratch\_fever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/73ab20/32.png) [@Cat\_scratch\_fever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_scratch_fever)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/652 "2003-11-20T00:08:25Z")
Homework done. The monkey with an iq of 100 (from a previous post) completed it speedily. You spend the night out drinking and dancing in celebration, sleep in tomorrow and miss the chance to turn it all in. I still wish for the demise of the phone company ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/653 "2003-11-20T00:13:31Z")
Tranggggg!!! You got all your homework done, but you did it by copying off the internet. You avoid getting expelled from school though, since in your rush you copied a Sponge Bob Square Pants slash fiction sight by misstake. I wish this pit of molten lava wasn’t quite so hot, I’m really starting to sweat buckets down here. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/654 "2003-11-20T00:20:20Z")
\ **Cat scratch fever** The aforementioned phone company (here for reffered to as the phone company) shall now and henceforth be transfered in full to the holdings of Mr William Gates Esq. and shall continue in buisness practices under the name of Windows 2003 Phone Company (here for reffered to as crap) for the next five hundred years. I wish my lylo wouldn’t keep burning up in this pool of molten lava. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/655 "2003-11-20T02:55:53Z")
Okay, **Bippy** , I’ll cool off the lava pit for you. Heck, I’ll remove _all_ heat from it. This, of course, means that the lava pit is now at absolute zero, which freezes the lava, and you, into total immobility, right down to the subatomic level. I wish I understood quantum mechanics. ---
**Author:** ![aye5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d26b3c/32.png) [@aye5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aye5)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/656 "2003-11-20T03:35:27Z")
swish and swish and flink…wish granted. You now fully understand (and has a PhD on) quantum mechanics. But the thing is, like Einstein, your hair gets so weird all ticks and lice get lost in it. I wish **bippy the Beardless** gets out the hell/frost hole he’s in. ---
**Author:** ![aye5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d26b3c/32.png) [@aye5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aye5)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/657 "2003-11-20T03:43:33Z")
hey guys lets vote: Do you think **bippy the Beardless** gets out of the hell hole he’s in? **YES** **NO** ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/658 "2003-11-20T04:54:50Z")
Not unless he can figure a way to wish himself out. And how will he communicate that, when every atom of his being is frozen solid? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/659 "2003-11-20T04:56:18Z")
Oh, and **aye5** , your wish that **Bippy** gets out of the lava pit will be granted – as long as you volunteer to take his place. ---
**Author:** ![j\_sum1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8baadc/32.png) [@j\_sum1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j_sum1)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951/660 "2003-11-20T12:04:53Z")
I wish the vote was tied and Bippy gets to stay in limbo forever. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951.md?page=32) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/corrupt-wish-game/210951.md?page=34)