# Could or would you learn an entirely foreign language because of someone you love? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 2, 2015, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641 "2015-02-02T21:47:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2015, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/21 "2015-02-03T19:41:02Z")
Yes, without reservation. In any case, I would learn the language of my long term partner even if she was fluent in mine. It seems like something I would obviously have to share with her. I can’t think of a better reason to learn a language, in fact. ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2015, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/22 "2015-02-03T19:44:40Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > Or you could do what my wife and I do, speak a third language and not learn either other’s so we don’t have to hassle with the in-laws. Don’t you sometimes feel it limits your exchanges? ---
**Author:** ![BaldDudePeekskill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b5e925/32.png) [@BaldDudePeekskill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BaldDudePeekskill)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2015, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/23 "2015-02-03T23:14:53Z")
My dad did. It worked out pretty well. Grazie,Pappa! ---
**Author:** ![SpoilerVirgin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4491bb/32.png) [@SpoilerVirgin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpoilerVirgin)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2015, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/24 "2015-02-04T01:27:31Z")
Wait, nobody in this thread has seen _Love, Actually_? The Colin Firth story is a pretty clear demonstration of how to fall in love without speaking the same language. I’d absolutely learn a new language for Colin Firth. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2015, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/25 "2015-02-04T13:45:01Z")
> [@Misnomer](#): > > FTR, add me to the list of people who completely reject the premise of falling in love with someone you can’t communicate with… But again, that happens in real life. There seem to be many real-life instances of people from entirely different cultures, nations, languages, etc. falling in love despite having very little ability to communicate. (Yes, I know, little communication isn’t the same as no communication, but maybe there could be an interpreter in my hypothetical to interpret for the two people, etc.) ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2015, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/26 "2015-02-04T14:07:14Z")
Would I? Oh, yes, I’d definitely do it for my true love. Could I? No, not without a lot of difficulty. I have a real learning block in that area. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2015, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/27 "2015-02-04T18:28:11Z")
For 26 years of marriage and 6 years of dating before that, I have been trying to learn to communicate in “Womanese”. I have picked up a few phrases here and there, but overall I’d say it’s taking much longer than I thought. But I love her, so I’ll keep trying! ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2015, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/28 "2015-02-04T19:14:39Z")
> [@SpoilerVirgin](#): > > Wait, nobody in this thread has seen _Love, Actually_? The Colin Firth story is a pretty clear demonstration of how to fall in love without speaking the same language. I love that movie, but that particular storyline annoys me for this very reason. They didn’t fall in love, they fell in lust. > [@Velocity](#): > > But again, that happens in real life. There seem to be many real-life instances of people from entirely different cultures, nations, languages, etc. falling in love despite having very little ability to communicate. (Yes, I know, little communication isn’t the same as no communication, but maybe there could be an interpreter in my hypothetical to interpret for the two people, etc.) Well, like you say, “very little” isn’t the same as “none.” And having an interpreter is practically speaking the same language! 🙂 I don’t think it takes _much_ communication, but there’s no way it’s truly love without _any_ communication. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2015, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/29 "2015-02-04T20:59:20Z")
Nothing serious ever came of it, but years ago, I had a crush on a deaf girl (she was cute, but what really caught my interest was her taste in literature). We only went out a few times, so there was no need for me to learn much in the way of ASL. But if we’d pursued a real relationship, I DEFINITELY would have had to learn her language. And I’d have been happy to. ---
**Author:** ![Arabella\_Flynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@Arabella\_Flynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arabella_Flynn)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2015, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/30 "2015-02-04T21:58:58Z")
I’ve been known to tackle languages because I wanted to read something and I found the translation annoyingly inaccurate. So sure, I think I’d do it for a soulmate. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/31 "2015-02-05T04:07:07Z")
I see it all the time here in Thailand. Farangs (Westerners) learning Thai for just this reason, and Thais learning English or whatever language. I’ve also seen couples who never learn each other’s language and generally communicate only through their children. Myself, I learned Thai long before I met the wife, and she English before she met me (naturally, since she was a grad student at the U of Hawaii when we met). ---
**Author:** ![storyguide3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@storyguide3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/storyguide3)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641/32 "2015-02-05T16:56:08Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > Or you could do what my wife and I do, speak a third language and not learn either other’s so we don’t have to hassle with the in-laws. Is that still the case now that you are in Taiwan (if I am remembering correctly)? As for the question, I am getting ready to start leaning Chinese because of my fiancee, luckily she already speaks English so it is not urgent. So if it was the only way to communicate properly, I would certainly do it as fast as possible. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-or-would-you-learn-an-entirely-foreign-language-because-of-someone-you-love/711641.md?page=1)