# Could you date someone who had the same name as a parent?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [November 21, 2005, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132 "2005-11-21T20:10:27Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Seren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seren)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/1 "2005-11-21T20:10:27Z")
So, I’ve recently started seeing this really great guy. Problem is, he’s got the same name as my dad. It’s not a major issue…just a minor thing that makes me go ‘ick’ sometimes, if I think about it.
So, how about it, Dopers? Could you be involved with someone who had the same name as a parent/guardian?
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### Author:  [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/2 "2005-11-21T20:13:37Z")
I dated a girl who had the same first name as my mother. That didn’t really affect me - I guess in my mind, I think of my mother as “Mom” not “Betty”. But I would be somewhat discomfitted by dating a woman with same first name as my sister.
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### Author:  [@davenportavenger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davenportavenger)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/3 "2005-11-21T20:16:33Z")
My ex has the same name as my dad. I was with him for four years. If another guy came along with the same name (which would be a real coincidence, since it’s not a super-common name, but could happen), I’d have no problem dating him. The thing is, I don’t think of my dad as his first name, I think of him as my dad, as in his first name is My and his middle name is Dad. So the first person I think of when I think of that first name is my ex. Now, if another guy came along with that name it might be a little harder since I already associate that name with my ex, but ultimately people are individuals and it’s not too hard to associate an old name with a new face.
My mom thought it was weird though.
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### Author:  [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/4 "2005-11-21T20:30:13Z")
Date her? I married her!
That said, in the 14 years that **Mrs. Cliffy** and I have been dating/married, I’ve probably called her Kathy less than a hundred times. Mostly it’s “Hon,” “Dear,” or “Hey you!”
–Cliffy
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### Author:  [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/5 "2005-11-21T21:04:22Z")
> [@Cliffy](#):
>
> Date her? I married her!
>
> That said, in the 14 years that **Mrs. Cliffy** and I have been dating/married, I’ve probably called her Kathy less than a hundred times. Mostly it’s “Hon,” “Dear,” or “Hey you!”
>
> –Cliffy
That’s how me and Mr. Kalhoun are. We’ve known each other 30 years, and I’ll bet that’s the total times we’ve addressed each other by our given names. In fact, if we slip and do it accidentally, we both get kinda creeped out.
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### Author:  [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/6 "2005-11-21T21:27:01Z")
When I was in high school the idea bothered me, but my father has a very common first name so I got over it pretty quickly. 🙂
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### Author:  [@Push\_You\_Down](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Push_You_Down)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/7 "2005-11-21T21:43:40Z")
Parent? That’s nothing. Your folks are mom and dad not “first name”.
Try dating someone with the same name as a sibling… Now that is weird.
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### Author:  [@phungi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phungi)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/8 "2005-11-21T21:52:26Z")
> [@Push You Down](#):
>
> Parent? That’s nothing. Your folks are mom and dad not “first name”.
You don’t know my mother… the words “Oh, Lorraine” could only have a paradoxical effect at a moment of pleasure (shudder, and not the good kind!).
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/9 "2005-11-21T21:53:26Z")
Paul McCartney’s maternal grandfather’s mother & wife & daugher (Paul’s mother) were all “Mary.”
Andrew Lloyd Webber’s first two (now first two ex-) wives were both SARAH. Now that’s weird.
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### Author:  [@psycat90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psycat90)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/10 "2005-11-21T21:59:34Z")
It wouldn’t bother me.
My son has been dating a girl with the same first name as my mother for 2 years now. It’s not a very common name. I thought it was a little odd at first, but it’s not really a big deal. My mother refuses to call her by her name though. Every conversation we have she asks “Is he still dating _that girl_?”
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### Author:  [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/11 "2005-11-21T22:08:35Z")
If I did, my wife would kill me.
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### Author:  [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/12 "2005-11-21T22:09:44Z")
If you can believe it, Mr. Athena and I have the exact same names as my parents (I’m named after my mother, Mr. Athena is named after his father which is coincidentally my father’s name, too). Luckily, neither Mr. Athena nor my father go by their given name - Mr. Athena goes by his middle name, and my Dad goes by a name that isn’t officially his at all.
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### Author:  [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/13 "2005-11-21T22:11:10Z")
My mom’s name is Mary but is alternately known as Mary, Marie, and Maria and there is no way I am going to cut myself off from all the women with those names, especially considering I’m a bit fond of the nationalities that usually employ them. Mm.
As for sisters, the first girl I ever kissed shares my youngest sister’s name and it never even dawned on me until this very moment. Of course, she was Jessica and my sister’s almost always Jess or Jessy.
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### Author:  [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/14 "2005-11-21T22:38:02Z")
This is kind of strange for me because I’m a bastard. I never knew my father (mom didn’t either, really), but I did know his name.
But even so I was with my SO for…months, I don’t know how long, before I one day got to talking about my life and suddenly realized…oh, you two have the same first name :eek: . I honestly hadn’t thought about it.
Not a problem for me…not nearly as much as that I have the same name as his ex-wife.
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### Author:  [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/15 "2005-11-21T22:43:50Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#):
>
> Andrew Lloyd Webber’s first two (now first two ex-) wives were both SARAH. Now that’s weird.
See my above post. Don’t tell me that’s weird. ☹
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### Author:  [@Cowgirl\_Jules](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cowgirl_Jules)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/16 "2005-11-21T22:58:10Z")
I did for years, and not only did he have the same name as my Dad but he looked like him and in many ways acted like him too. It was only odd at first, and later if my Mom referred to my Dad by his given name and I’d have to wonder who she was talking about. Dad’s name was “Dad” in my mind of course!
Now I’m dating a man whose ex-wife has my name. I tease him that he’s off the hook if he accidentally calls out the wrong name, but he assures me that he has us straight. 😃
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### Author:  [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/17 "2005-11-21T23:39:58Z")
I’m living with a guy with the same name as a horrible ex of mine. Now THAT was weird at first. Especially since there was a break in time but no other relationships to speak of between them. It took me a few months to get used to it and break the association with the name.
Now, if he had my dad’s name, that’d be cool, as long as he didn’t ever want me to call him Daddy…
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### Author:  [@Lisa-go-Blind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lisa-go-Blind)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/18 "2005-11-21T23:52:33Z")
My dad has one of the most common names in America with several variants, so it wouldn’t be a big deal at all. For a while in high school, in fact, I had a crush on a guy who not only had the same name as my dad but also the same birthday. 🙂
And I agree with the previous posters that dating someone with the same name as my brother would be weirder.
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### Author:  [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/19 "2005-11-21T23:57:28Z")
The first name? No problem, although it is a bit old-fashioned now.
The last name? Fuhgeddaboudit! At least, not without a bit of genealogical Q&As first. (The surnames in my family are rather uncommon, on both sides.)
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### Author:  [@suranyi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/suranyi)
#### Post date: [November 21, 2005, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-date-someone-who-had-the-same-name-as-a-parent/332132/20 "2005-11-21T23:59:22Z")
I have the same name as my fiancee’s father. So far it doesn’t seem to have bothered her.
Ed
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